Chapter 4

65 1 0
                                    

I don't know whether to make Christian toxic or love worthy.
There will be acts of self harm in this chapter.

————————————————————————

"Why didn't you tell me?" Tessa asked. Wesley booked us a few rooms in the hotel where the party was hosted last week. We each had our own, and right now they were all here in mine; besides the dumb blonde. My mother chose to stay behind, so neither of them knew of our whereabouts.
Why did she have to be so stupid? My dad is an abuser; he's selfish, greedy, and heartless. Why would she stay with a man like him?

"Now isn't the time, Tessa," I replied. I didn't want to have to explain my frustration with her.

"So you just let it go on?" She asked, raising her voice.

"Don't act like you care Tess."

"Why wouldn't I care? You're my sister!"

"Because! Because, since you were a child you've had it easy. You were loved, you were held. Meanwhile I was being trained. Who knew being a wife would take training? And if I slipped up, well, you know now. You never had that, you never saw that side of Father."

Her eyes were filled with tears. "You think it was easy for me? To always keep a smile on my face, to pretend that everything was okay? I missed you! We were close, and then one day you were just distant. Do you have any idea what that felt like for me? To lose my twin! That was hard for me, Terra."

"And you still don't get it!" I shouted. Then I laughed, "God, Tess! I feel sorry for you. I am so sorry that I was being taught how to be a good wife while you ran through the house laughing, enjoying yourself. I am very sorry that while I was being beaten and becoming a strong woman who could take it, you got to play with dolls. I am so sorry that you had the chance to fall in love and to be loved, while all of that was taken from me. I am very fucking sorry that was hard for you!"

"So this is how you truly feel," she said. "All those years, that bitterness, the cold. That was all because you blamed me. You're right, I was favored. And the entire time I never once noticed your suffering. But every time that I asked, 'Are you okay?' 'Do you want to talk about it?' You sent me away. You shut me out, Terra. That's what you do, you shut people out. I tried fixing things between us. I hope you know that you will always be alone. Because you can't trust people and you can't let them in. You don't let anyone care for you. Get over yourself, or face the truth."
Tessa stormed out, and it felt like a million stabs to the heart.

"Get out," I told them. "Get out!"
Jacob and Christian left, while Wesley walked towards me.

"There will be a bodyguard assigned to you first thing in the morning. I just wanted to let you know."
As he walked out, he turned around. "I'm here for you, Terra. If you need anything, let me know."

He left the room, going back to his own. I locked the door, and slid down to the floor. I cried, like the weak little girl I am. Tessa was right, and for years I didn't want to accept that it was my fault. I wanted to find someone else to blame for my own hurt and I drove a wedge between my sister and I for it. I blamed her because it was easy. It was easier for me to hate her than to live with the fact that my dad just didn't love me.
I raged. Screams escaped my lips as my hands pounded into the floor in anger. I stood and punched the wall, creating a hole. I punched more, and more, until that wasn't enough. I ripped the covers from the bed, shattered the mirror getting glass stuck in my hands, I threw the flower vase from the bedside table at the wall, I slammed my arms down on the glass coffee table, I flipped over the arm chairs and threw the tv across the room.

What have I done? How does that make you any different from your father, a voice in my head asked.

-It begins here-

Falling for my Husband's BrotherWhere stories live. Discover now