✅ Over Protected

24. Alice Makes Demands

"You know about...?"

Mum paused, not ready to complete the sentence. But she was looking at the book on her desk. Combined with my mention of the two main lysentripases, she had to know that I'd figured out what she was doing.

"Alice, you can't tell her about that," she said. "Believe me, I only did it for her own good."

"You saw that when she was embarrassed about wetting the bed, she was more willing to follow your instructions," I said, laying out the story so far as best I could guess. "You put her in those diapers that have drugs in, activated by moisture. First to make sure that her accidents didn't clear up as her immune system dealt with the virus. And then the other ones to make her feel dizzy and suggestible. You were doing it to make her listen to you again, and to make her accept punishment. You didn't realise that she already has her own moral compass. That she's doing the right thing as best she can, and just isn't comfortable talking to you about the difficult choices. But... I told you about that now. I listened to what she told me, I checked that it's true. So why would you want to punish her more?"

She didn't say anything this time. She seemed almost as embarrassed as Sarah had been, taking punishment for her accident.

"You just loaded a bunch more punishment on her shoulders," I continued. "You demanded the right to punish her further after you made her wet herself. When you had no reason to."

"I want to protect her," she said. "Peer pressure is a terrible thing. There's... You probably don't know this, but there's a special school. For kids who have gone to acting like babies. Where they'll teach them to be good girls again, if they didn't have strong parenting the first time around. I'm in the middle of getting Sarah admitted, the daytime accidents almost convinced her that she can't risk being around those girls from school. So maybe..."

"Why?" I was actually yelling this time, but lowered my voice before continuing. "Mum, she's trying to be good. She's doing her best to help her friends. She's a good girl without you trying to ruin her life. Maybe you don't approve of the games she plays, or the TV shows she wants to watch, or the music she likes... but I can't believe that's something worth hurting her this much over. You can't keep on doing this to her. I hoped that when I told you the truth about what she's been doing, you'd realise that she isn't a bad kid. But you did this anyway. Can you at least tell me why?"

"I guess," Mum mumbled. "I got used to changing her. To treating her like a baby. I kind of missed out on that when you were younger. Always letting the neighbours look after you. I never realised how it makes me feel to be a real mother. Like that unconditional love. I heard that some parents realise it's been missing from their lives, and that's why some of them do it. When I talked to Gi–" She coughed and interrupted herself. "I talked to some other Mommies who've done this, and they said that the unconditional love of a child is the most precious thing in the world. And now I know what they meant. I guess even when I realised that Sarah deserves better, I didn't let myself believe it. I thought maybe I'll let her grow up again in a couple of weeks, or months. Putting off when I have to give up babying my little one. I'm sorry."

"It's her you should apologise to," I said. "But you won't. And you shouldn't, because she'd never trust you again. I don't want to see how much that will hurt her. But like... please..."

"I just want her to be happy. And she's enjoying herself. Soon she'll give in, and she won't have to worry about her manipulative friends. She won't have to fight against the situation she's in to be a good girl, and she won't be tempted to do the wrong things. She can just relax and be a baby, and she's starting to enjoy it already. Can't you see how that would be a relief for her?"

"I can see it. But! Not everybody is the same. Sarah does the right thing even when it's hard, because she wants to be good. And I think she cares more than anyone about not letting her friends down. She doesn't need your help. I know how hard it can be. I mean, I've done bad things as well, you know? Got carried away when one of my friends had a dumb idea. So it feels like it would be fun to not have to worry about that stuff, to let somebody else make the choices. But that's..." I hesitated when the thought came to me, but there was no doubt about it.