Zavier
The shit Za'ir fussed at me the other day kind of stuck. At the end of the day it's about our daughter. The thought of us not working out just hurt me too much. Za'ir meant the world to me and is being best friends meant even more.
"Son what's wrong?" My mom asked sitting next to me on the couch.
"Ma, I fucked uo with Za'ir. I didn't cheat or nothing. Shut I accused her of cheating. But instead of her handling it the way she did I snapped on her. Called her out her name and some more shit. I know we not getting back together shit she made that clear. I just want to be there for my daughter at this point. I'm not saying I'm a fuck up as a boyfriend or nothing like that. But I am saying the shit La'monica said did kinda get in my head. She told me since things didn't work out with her and I she hoped Za'ir would cheat. I thought she knew something I didn't do I was on edge the whole time. I let another bitch get in between us. I'm annoyed." I began to vent.
"Well son. Honestly y'all had no business getting back together. Look at the circumstances." She shrugged.
"Momma what type of advice is that? Bye." I said frustrated getting up.
"Wait you keep running the fuck off and it's going to piss me off! Sit the fuck down!" She yelled.
"That's your muthafuckin problem you're always running. Running to the next bitch, running to me, instead of facing what's really going the fuck on. You need to grow up Zavier. Stop running!" She yelled as I slammed the front door.
Fuck what anybody says. At the end of the day it is what it is.
...
Later one that evening I gave Monica a call.
"Hello?" She answered sounding annoyed.
"Where you at?" I asked giving her the same attitude.
"Boy I'm on campus in class Whatchu need." She sighed.
"I wanna meet up real quick." I chuckled.
"No. Plus I'm doing finales today. You know how much this nursing program means to me." She fussed.
"It'll only be for a minute." I pouted.
"Hurry up." She said giving in.
Her school wasn't but 20 minutes away so I got there pretty quick. La'Monica is 21 almost finished with college. I met her through Monty of course. Up until Za'ir getting pregnant things were perfectly fine. I just couldn't get Za'ir out of my head.
"Whatchu want?" She fussed climbing into the car.
"Damn no hug or nothing?" I fussed.
"No. What do you want? The last time I was trying to be civil you fucked that up." She snapped.
"I'm sorry look... I was trying to make things easier for Za'ir and I. She did have my baby. I will forever love her for that. But I understand I fucked up with you big time. Things was going straight until I fucked on her. Im sorry." I finally confessed.
"You know what Zavier fuck you. Do you know how hard it is to actually put my gaurd down? And you go and fuck on someone you told me was just a friend?!" She yelled at me with tears in her eyes.
"Baby I'm sorry. In all honesty she is a friend. She's my best friend. Our feelings just got too deeply involved. You know how much she meant to me. I thought you understood. I love her on a different level." I told her honestly.
"So what the fuck did you pull me out of class for? To hurt me even more? You're telling ne you love this bitch probably better than you can love me nigga!" She spat.
"Im telling you what Za'ir and I have will never go away... but what me and you had is something totally different. I love you differently. I touch you differently, I fuck you differently and I damn sure provide for you differently. You know this." I explained.
"Zavier... I need some time." She sighed.
"Take all the time you need. I'll be here." I said kissing her cheek.
"Whatever." She mumbled before getting out of the car.
I made sure she made it back into the building safely before I pulled off. I'm not sure if I just made things worse or better but it is what it is. My momma is right. I gotta stop running.
...
Za'ir
1 week later
"So here's your check." I sighed handing Rinny her check.
"Wait I thought I was supposed to be paying you for the damages." She asked confused.
"You did." I reassured her a little confused.
"I still have $1000 on this check." She said turning the check towards me.
"Yea I know. I do payroll myself. Look at the check and see how much you made throughout the week." I instructed her.
"I made $2000 in just a week? All I did was wash hair and sweep it up." She said confused.
"Yes but I still pay my employees very well. Especially with the cost of living. Now don't spend that all at once. How's your car?" I asked her.
"It's fine. Like nothing happened." She shrugged.
"Okay we'll don't do no stupid shit like drinking and driving again." I warned her.
"Yes ma'am." She sighed.
"Okay I'll see you tomorrow. Be safe driving home." I instructed her.
"Yes ma'am." She smiled leaving my office.
"So are you going to tell me why she's working here or no?" Ray asked walking in behind her.
"She crashed into my car drinking and driving so I paid for both of our damages and put her on payroll until she pays me back." I sighed.
"How much did she do?"He asked sitting down on the couch.
"Just $3000 on both of our cars. You know I got the discount from Keith." I shrugged.
"She'll be out of here soon." I smiled.
"Well damn. Okay then motha." He teased.
"I was a kid once... not that slow but I was a kid once." I laughed.
It's funny but I can sense myself maturing and getting back to the old me. I hope this feeling lasts and nothing stops me from achieving my goals.
