Endlessly

I Am Not Afraid

The fierce growl of your stomach forces you awake.

"Loki-" As soon as the sound of his name leaves your lips, filling the empty cabin, you remember that he's not there. You reach up to rub your eyes, the crust of your dried tears blurring your vision.

When you cease your rampant rubbing, and your eyes adjust to the dim light of the room- you spot a vase, filled with a slightly grayish water and packed full of your magical purple flowers, joyously glowing next to you on a very nearby oak end table.

Hmm. Loki...

Wait- those weren't there before he left.

He must be back.

You begin to sit up in the chair, guilelessly excited, when you spot a large- perhaps too large, figure in the corner of the kitchen.

The dark figure is hunched over the stove, its black hair hanging forward, completely hiding its face. The figure appears to be at least a couple of feet shorter than Hilund, and when you take a moment to breathe, you cannot help but notice the heady smell of leather, grass and blood heavy in the air.

It's him- but he's wildly different than before.

"Loki?" You nearly condemn yourself for speaking out loud.

The massive figure lurches, immediately shrinking downward until it takes a shape you recognize exceedingly well.

"Loki- are you okay?" You force yourself through the shock of what you've just witnessed- a little voice in your mind telling you that what Loki is going through right now could be much more difficult for him than you understand.

"Gersemi- It's going to be okay- you were just dreaming-" Loki glides to your side, wrapping his arms around you, the warmth of him nearly rendering you speechless.

"Lo- no- I..."

You open your eyes to the view of a positivity intoxicating Summer's day on Asgard- a wave of relief washing over you as you realize that this had all been a dream. You wake curled in Loki's lap, the honeyed scent of him hypnotizing as sleep remains heavy at the back of your eyes. The sun is mere moments away from setting, but it's still warm enough outside that you feel no need to reach for your cloak. You turn to your left, a warm glow of happiness washing over you as you look at your parents, snuggled together, your mother's arm draped lovingly over Hnoss who leans against Kvasir, a bundled little newborn in her arms. You tip your head upward to look at Loki, and he smiles down at you, handsome and charming as ever, his arms wrapped protectively around you. He glances over at your mother with a grin, the image of them beginning to blur.

No.

This isn't right. When did Hnoss have her baby? I don't remember when my parents met Lo...

"Good morning, sleepy head." Your sister's playful tone pulls your attention back to your surroundings once again. "I swear, you've taken more naps than this little guy since you got knocked up." She gives the newborn a kiss on the forehead, and he coos in delight.

You feel your face flush with embarrassment at her crude description of your pregnant state, and you timidly eye your parents to gauge their response.

They remain eerily calm, cuddled together still; not a care in the word as they smile at their little growing family.

Wait- when did I tell them I was pregnant? How did they respond? Why can't I remember?

"Are you ready to hold your nephew? Gods know you need the practice before yours arrives." Your sister's teasing once again pulls you from your thoughts.