Endlessly

You're By My Side

With several hours left still to kill before you'll be attending dinner with Laufey, you and Loki have both found your own unique ways to pass the time; none of which, however, include the two of you actually talking to each other.

He's returned to the armchair, staring into the fire while you occasionally let out an emphatic sigh, pacing the large room with your arms wrapped around yourself- hoping that eventually he'll take notice and ask you what's the matter.

To be entirely honest, you're unsure what you'd say if he did ask. I mean, what isn't the matter at this moment?

You're meant to be back on Vanaheim in just two days, for your wedding to a man who has equally no interest in that marriage, pregnant with a frost giant's child, lightyears away from your family and anything else remotely familiar to you, sick to your stomach with worry for your sister.

Absolutely nothing is okay right now.

"I need to get back home." You don't realize the words have left your mouth until you hear them echoing through the otherwise silent room.

"I'm working on that." The despondent prince sighs, shoulders slumped forward toward the fire, a visual display of the weight of the mental load he bears.

"Prince Aster is a good guy, you know." You have no idea why those were the next words your mouth, certainly not your brain, chose to emit, and you wish you could rewind time and never have spoken them when Loki's fingers dig into the armrests of the chair in response to them, tearing into the thick leather fabric.

It's too late to backpedal now, so you continue your attempt at explaining yourself. "He doesn't want to marry me. Just as much as I do not desire to wed him. He's... stuck- trapped in the situation much like me. He loves someone else- as I do." At last, your words seem to have struck him in a way that has evoked an emotion apart from anger, and his eyes meet yours as you continue. "I would not have been able to return to you if it was not for his understanding and the help of his lover's magic."

Don't... don't say it. The little voice of reason in your head is screaming, begging you to shut the hel up, but you brush her away as you would a pestering fly.

"Aster knows that I am with child. He also knows that the person he is in love with would not be accepted by his people as a suitable partner to a king; because of this, he's offered to continue forward with our marriage if things between you and I cannot be remedied quickly. The marriage, obviously, would be strictly for the public eye, but would also ensure that our baby was protected, respected, and an heir to the throne of Vanaheim." Your stomach twists into a knot as you begin to ramble. "I know this might all seem crazy, but I'm sure that you and I could work something out with-"

"What?" He rises from the chair, clumsy and unsteady on his feet as though you've just struck him. "No! I would never allow my child to be raised by another man," He clutches one hand to his chest. "Never knowing who their true family was... How-" He staggers toward you, using the back of the chair for support to regain his balance. "How could somebody do that?" A silent sob vibrates through him, shaking his shoulders and interrupting his rant as tears stream down his face. For the first time, the gravity of exactly what you'd be asking him to do sinks in.

"Loki- I..." Your voice catches in your throat at the sight of him unraveling before you. This clever, charming, undaunted man that swept you off of your feet in a matter of seconds upon meeting him is falling apart in front of you.

And it's all your fault.

How could you be so dense? Not to see how horrid what you've just said to him is?

"I would never ask you to-"

"Never!? He rasps, with a sudden and terrifying change of demeanor, rising back up to his full height and beyond- his form, still mostly Asgardian, emits a chill that cuts straight through your thick layers of clothing, radiating off of him.

"I'm sorry." You reach a hand, far larger than you're used to, up to caress his cheek. "I'm a bit out of my element here." You hold up your free hand in between the two of you, marveling at its Aegean state- a single, bewildered laugh forcing its way out of you.

He tangles his fingers in between yours, never breaking eye contact with you nor speaking a single word. His eyes say enough for you to understand the complex and painful mix of emotions surging through him.

"You asked me how I was doing earlier." You swallow, trying your absolute best to choose your next words with the utmost care. "I'm not okay. The only thing that is okay right now is that you're by my side." He squeezes your hand tighter as tears fill your eyes. "I have made promises to people that I care about very much back home and I am absolutely terrified that my sister will not survive if I don't return very soon."

"I will attempt to make a deal with Laufey- and her people tonight; a deal she would be a fool to not accept. If she refuses, I will get you out of here and back home no matter the cost. There are vernonia's growing on Asgard as we speak. We will collect as many of them as we can carry, and immediately go to your sister. Whatever is left over, we will study. I promise that I- with your help, will be able to keep you and our baby healthy no matter the circumstance."

"Loki?" You pause, pondering on your words. "What do you want to happen? Do you want her to accept and be gracious, or do you want there to be a fight?"

"I'm not entirely sure." He turns back to face the flames.

You nod. "I understand."

Loki morphs into a completely different, but certainly more familiar, person at your words. As simple as they seemed to you, the clearly unexpected reassurance you've provided has reduced him into an emotional quagmire- calm and unsuspecting on the surface, with grievous danger lurking below if you were to get too close and accidentally slip in.

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When you and Loki arrive at the dining hall, you're surprised, almost startled by the sight of it. You'd expected it to be all sharp angles and ice, but it wasn't any of that.  It's heavy fur rugs and candlelight; intimate- small and warm, with a dark wooden table placed in the center of the room, only large enough to accommodate the three of you, or perhaps one more if you were comfortable being elbow to elbow with each other. You and Loki take your seats, seemingly all unassigned- just another small oddity in this already bizarre environment. As you settle into the chair, you marvel at how strange it is that you could easily reach over without so much as leaning, and make contact with either Loki or Laufey, when she arrives. While wildly unusual, you find the setting to be overtly familiar- comforting, even.

Before long, Laufey saunters into the space, her paper-thin silk dress reflecting the candlelight with each swing of her hips, confidence oozing from her every pore.

You're finding it more and more difficult each moment to believe there's any chance her and Loki aren't related.

Her wavy black hair falls past her shoulders with no barret or clip to hold it back into a more formal style. She's also left her crown behind, another bizarre detail that goes completely against the grain of how a royal should greet guests.

When you finally tear your gaze, well, stare, from her, you realize that she's entered the room entirely alone, no housecarl or guards at her side. In fact, the three of you are completely alone in this room together, not a servant or member of the waitstaff in sight.

"Who's hungry?" She purrs, hands rested leisurely on her hips, the muscles at the corners of her mouth tugging her lips up into a grin, exposing a row of shiny, white, razor-sharp teeth.