The Assistant [MxM]

30.

Happy Mother's Day to the mothers.. IG.

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"Today is just me getting to know you— anything you're comfortable with sharing. Why you seek therapy or just simply questions you need to ask of me,"

Sincere stared into the camera as his therapist spoke— today was finally the day they'd speak. The business trip had been going well. It was now day three and Mike had gave him this morning off since he had to go out and do whatever it was that he had to do with his colleagues and Sincere explained having a Skype call with his therapist. He'd did as much filing, organizing, faxing, and scheduling as he could before his time to meet with Dr. Sanchez.

"I mean I'm not really comfortable with sharing anything— aren't you supposed to tell me why I need therapy? That's the point right? If I knew why then.. I wouldn't be here."

Dr.Sanchez chuckled, "What brought you to therapy? What made you reach out?" He rephrased the question.

Sincere sighed, "those around me suggested that I need it."

"Okay good— those around you meaning those closest to you I'm assuming?"

"Yeah— and a few doctors."

Dr.Sanchez nodded, "Doctors? Do you want to talk more about that?"

"I'm not trying to be rude, I literally had to damn near type an essay on why I'm seeking help. You know all the answers to the questions you're asking. I chose you because you're one of the best with great reviews and you also specialize in suicide. I searched hard for a therapist like me," he referred to Dr. Sanchez having a husband. "So— I wouldn't feel judged but I'm feeling like this is already a waste of time. I literally in the assessment told you all you need to know."

"I understand your frustration— you're correct I do know but I can't help you if you're not going to open up Sincere. Writing things down are different from saying them outloud, how can this be a waste of time when you haven't even given it a chance? Are you seeking help for those around you or for yourself? I can tell you now this isn't going to work if you're not in it for you."

Sincere sighed, "I apologize. It's just new for me and honestly speaking I don't believe in this type of thing. I genuinely do want to try though,"

"That's understandable, at any time if you feel as if this isn't for you then we can end the meetings. You're afraid of commitment—"

"I'm not," Sincere cut him off, "See what I mean? I haven't even said anything and you're already trying to know me."

"In your assessment— from what you did provide. I see a pattern of you never finishing things you start, never having a serious relationship until you were forced into one, you jeopardize friendships/relationships, you never had a steady career because you can't just stick to one thing for a long while, the suicide attempts always failed because although you wanted to end it you couldn't go through with it. Even now you're pushing me away not even thirty minutes into the session because you're afraid to commit to anything. You have a fear of dedicating yourself to something for a long time. Do you know why that is?"