Affluent [H.S]

Forty

❀Warning - bleeding during pregnancy/ worries of miscarriage❀

28 September 2020
Emersyn Styles

I've woken up twice this morning - first beside Harry and the second beside Niall.

My morning with Harry was doting, he kissed all over me before speaking his gratitude and affection into the air towards me and our little star.

However, my morning with Niall was different. I woke up gasping from a nightmare, crying and unable to breathe. He's a deep sleeper but I managed to wake him up without even needing to shove or shout, he was so worried.

I don't even know what happened.

I'm convinced my body knows I'm not safe here, especially when I know the dangers of my father and what he's doing plus being pregnant with a baby that's going to shatter his world.

In my heart I believe he'd never hurt me in the ways I'm thinking but he always used to be physically violent towards Koen and I - he doesn't love us, we're game pieces in his master plan.

My body is trying to keep this tiny little miracle baby desperately safe yet I'm surrounded by constant danger. A candle in a storm - I need shelter for the protection of my child.

"-and then I rolled my eyes cause he's a massive dick sometimes, he's called me a fish before cause apparently I don't have an attention span... like how do you love him? Is he not mean to you? Cause I want to punch him sometimes but I know he'd hit me back harder, you know? Anyways, I rolled my eyes and he glared at me, like an angry dad... you have that to look forward to."

I'm quite literally cradled like a baby in Niall's arms while he rambled mindlessly about the one topic that calms me down - Harry. Honestly, I keep zoning in and out; only hearing bits and pieces of the conversation so I'm very lost but I can agree with Harry, the man can't stay on the same topic for more than five seconds without flitting elsewhere.

He's very comforting though, holding me tight like he'll never let go and it reassures me. We're perched in the middle of our bed, the duvet pushed away while we're just dressed in minimal comfy clothing.

I don't even know how one would interpret this image without any context.

From my inflamed cheeks to his rambling we look like quite the pair.

"I guess it's quite exciting that you're having a baby- I've never held one before... will you let me hold it?"

"Him, yes." I correct, watching him frown above me.

"How do you know you're having a boy?"

I shrug my shoulders gently, nuzzling into his shoulder. "Harry's just convinced we're having a girl and I want something to debate over."