I'm Also A We // Hyunlix

The Sum Of Seven, Pt. 1

NOW

F E L I X

Felix ends the live and doesn't feel the urge to immediately check the reactions online, even though he usually takes so much delight from reading the comments. Especially for this one, where they just revealed to Stay that both he and Chan are home in Australia, here and together. Felix joked before that he's not sure who of them anticipated this moment more, them or Stay.

But Stay is not on his mind today. "How is he?" he asks instead.

Chan takes off his mask and Felix once again notices how tired he looks, exhausted in a way that is more than just missing sleep. Chan squeezes Felix's shoulder, and Felix is glad he's not being made fun off. "He's alright. Bored mostly. He's not in pain, I promise. He's in the waiting room now, Minho is staying in the car."

Felix nods. It's easier today because they're outside, where it's windy and warm, and the world feels alive and real enough to be reasonable about this. Hyunjin fractured his hand during rehearsal, nothing crazy, not even the worst thing that happened to any of them, and after an initial examination at the ER he is now, a few days later, getting consultation on a possible surgery. Felix had seen him briefly through Minho until Hyunjin went up to the doctor's office where he wasn't allowed to take anyone with him because of their Covid regulations. He looked good. Normal. Nothing to be worried about.

"What about what BamBam said?" Felix whispers, even though there's no one else close enough to overhear.

Chan wraps his arms around himself and ducks his head and Felix understands that he's thought about that too.

"It should be fine," he says eventually, and Felix wants to believe him. "It's not a company contracted doctor. If they're doing the surgery there, they'd have a really hard time to get to his medical records. Which is not gonna help them if they don't get to perform their own tests anyway."

Felix shudders and it's not from the wind. What Chan is saying is making sense in the twisted universe they're living in now, but they both are acutely aware that they don't know anything at all about how things work and that all they can do is rely on the fractions of knowledge they do have, hope, and what's left of their common sense.

"How are you holding up?" Chan rubs Felix's arm, and Felix is reminded of how little he had that lately. Chan all to himself. And present. He's missed this, missed the person he is when it's just Chan, a reminder of the part of him that is still the little kid from Australia, with big dreams and determination to get there.

"I'm alright," Felix says as they both turn to walk along along the riverside, the botanical gardens on the other side, and he finds that it's the truth, that he's doing better than he thought he would. Even if it takes the occasional slip over to one of the others, and Hyunjin's latest selfie from today in his messenger app.

Chan is unusually quiet, locked in his own thoughts, and Felix walks a little closer, brushing their arms together to remind him that he's not alone, that Felix is right there.

"Ah, sorry." Chan rubs the back of his head, aware he's been caught.

"You are so far away lately," Felix says and glances over. Some days he knows he will get a reaction, others Chan is so busy with his own mind that the comment doesn't even make it through to him.

"I'm sorry," Chan sighs. "It's just-," he gestures vaguely.

Felix worries his lip between his teeth. Chan's been distant even before the bond started, working even longer hours, being on the phone during shared meals and so often not even in the room when they're all together, but Felix is not sure if he wants to say that out loud.