Case 420 /finished BxB/

21. the call

I am so close. So close to touch his lips with mine. To feel his lips agaisnt mine, the feeling i was longing for for so long.

I move so close to him that i couldve almost felt his lips. So close that the space between us couldnt even be counted as millimeter. We were so close.

So close to doing the one thing that separated us apart so many years ago. We would never do it. No matter how much we wanted to. The one thing i wanted so bad that i couldnt even describe it.

Everything in my whole body and mind was telling me to go for it. To kiss him. To show him that i wont leave. I was so ready for it.

The way he looked at me was making me feel like there was nothing else in this world. The way his stare is so intense that i didnt want to look away for even one short seccond.

It felt like the moment lasted forever. Like we were so close yet not touching frozing in time like that. Like this moment was infinite.

Our breaths matched up and my heartbeat raced and i could hear his match mine. Everything that was happening was happening together. Like a song.

The seccond i decided to close the distance between us is the seccond my phone rang. For fuck sake.

I groan and fall back next to him on my back. Ash lets out a small chuckle because of the distraction.

I take the call and my boss voice takes over the room. "Hello aspen" he says and i take a deep breath "hey" i say flat with no emotions other than annoyance.

"Am i interrupting you right now?" He asks me and i look ash his way for a few secconds. "No" i lie. Totally didnt interupt anything.

"I would like to discuss a few things about a case" he says "ok" i say shorting my awnsers as much as i could.

"We had some information about case 420 being in amsterdam. The guy who took the case from you is in the hospital right now so we cant place him on it right now" he waits to talk again letting the information sink into my head.

"I want you to take the case right now. Dont mess it up" he says knowing i might mess up. "Ok" i say quiet. "If you succeed you will be my successor when i die" he says and could feel the shock go all the way through my body.

Be his successor? I know he treats me like i am his son but taking over the company is such a huge thing i dont even know if i could take it all over.

I let out a very silent gasp and my boss chuckles on the end of the line. "You deserve it aspen" he says "thank you so much" i say forgetting reality for a few minutes.

"You are like a son for me. I still remember the day we brought you in so clearly. I'm thankful i was there in time" he says and i could feel the words sting like they always do.

I try to forget that day. To scratch it from my memory and to never be brought up again. I know that it wont happen but if i could i would let that day disapear from existence.

"I have to go now aspen. I'll see you in a month" he says and hangs up the phone.

I stare at the ceiling for a few secconds letting the words set into my mind. Letting reality hit me like a brick and drown me in the cold water holding me back from swimming up.

The spotter is in the hospital? He honestly deserved it but i have a sneaky suspension that he wasnt there just because of a accident that doesnt involve ash.

I would need to take the case again. I need to kill ash. The guy i was about to kiss. The guy who i was so sure of i wanted to keep close to me a few minutes ago. The guy who i promised to be friends with forever when i was younger. The guy who i ruined his life of.

The guy right next to me staring at me without any emotions on his face.

"You will kill me?" He asks softly without any anger in his tone. Without anything. He doesnt look mad or sad or happy. He doesnt look like anything. He is like a blank canvas being shaped.

"I-" i dont know what to say. I dont know how to speak. I dont know how to tell him. I dont know if i really do want to kill him. Do i?

Maybe deep down i know the awnser that i am hiding for myself and to him right now. I dont know what i actually want.

Its him or the company. Its the person who made me this way agaisnt the only way ive known how to life like.

"You are?" He asks after a few minutes when i still havent awsnered him. I stay quiet. He doesnt run away. He stays there. Waiting for me to say it.

Would he run away if i told him i was going to kill him. Would he try to kill me first or would he let it all happen. Would he watch me die or would he look away regretting the thing he did.

Am i able to handle him dying? Because of my hands non the less.

"Aspen" ash says and a twisted smile appears on his face. "You will?" He says with a new type of hint in them. A weird twisted emotion spreads all over him.

He looks thrilled to hear the news. Happy almost. Somewhere in his eyes i could sence something different but i wasnt sure what it was. The way his smile turns into a huge grin showing off his white teeth.

"I dont know" i say and sit straight up not turning to his face. The last thing i want to see is that expression.

The same expression he does when he is trying to self destruct everything he has. The smile he learned to put on to hide his real feelings. The way his eyes change and are unable to read. Its all because of me.

I shake my head and grap my hair with my 2 hands and pull my knees up to my chest and burry my head between them.

"I think you should do it" he says and laughs out a maniac laugh. Its loud but without happiness. Its empty like a loud can.

"Stop it!" I scream at him and he immediately does so. His face change back to the same blank canvas like he hit the on off switch.

"Dont you want to see my blood flowing all over you?" He asks me like he is offering something romantic. I look his way. He takes my hand and forms it into a fist.

The way my hand would be if i had a knife in it. He holds it with his 2 hands and makes a stab motion and stops right agaisnt his heart.

He fakes out the scenario like he was actually dying because of me. He acts like he couldnt breath anymore and choking on his own blood. His eyes flutter and he lets his body fall back on the bed.

He spews out a laugh loud and clear for me to hear. I was out of words and didnt know what to feel like. I didnt know what to do except sit there emotionless like a statue.

A single tear falls from my eye. I take a deep breath trying to get the image out of my head. I try not to replay the memory but like it was real.

The way my hand would be tight agaisnt the knife and the warm blood going over it. The feeling of taking out the knife and the blood going all over me. The way i could see the light in his eyes disappear and see the last breath leave his lungs.

Ash sits up and places a hand on my cheek brushing away the tear that had fallen. He lets his hand there like it is its home. Like it belongs there and should forever stay there.

"You should kill me" he says letting his real emotions shine though for just a seccond. "Its a great deal. Me for a whole company" he says and takes a deep breath acting like he is okay with it all.

"Look at it as if its payback for your sister" he says and the right corner of his smile goes up. "Dont mention her" i say harsh and cold. "Dont ever fucking say that again" i say blood slowley boiling up inside me. "Then kill me aspen" he says and holds his hands in the air to show me i could kill him easily.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP" i yell loud at him.