To Jupiter and back

Chapter 20

In the midst of Billie's tumultuous emotions, Jupiter's soothing voice resonated through the room, gently caressing the air. "Calm down, it's going to be alright," she reassured, her words a balm for Billie's troubled soul. But despite Jupiter's comforting words, Billie couldn't find solace; she felt trapped, the weight of their shared secret pressing against her skull. With trembling arms, she clutched her head, desperately trying to ward off the turmoil within.

"It's not okay, Jupiter. They know," Billie's voice quivered with anxiety as she let her emotions pour out. Her fears hung heavy in the room, suffocating her. "And you have no idea how bad it can get. They'll speculate about me being gay, spew hate my way, and it might even lead to my record canceling our deal." Billie let out a sigh, heavy with the weight of her worries, as she stormed out of the bedroom.

Leaving everything behind, except for her essentials—phone, wallet, passport, and keys—Billie hastily fled, her footsteps echoing the panic within her. The world of fame proved unforgiving; one misstep could lead to irreparable consequences. And now, the once-private kiss they shared on the iconic Eiffel Tower would be plastered on every article, scrutinized by gossipmongers.

The fear of judgment gnawed at Billie's heart as she anticipated the headlines that would invade her thoughts relentlessly. Her knee bounced anxiously as she desperately searched for a ride that could whisk her away to the airport, seeking refuge far from the turmoil.

A white Prius glided towards her, the driver offering a simple French greeting. Billie kept her head low, desperate to shield herself from prying eyes, as the white car carried her towards the airport. Her mind raced, her heart pounding in her chest, as she searched for any ticket that could take her back home, to California.

In a state of panic, Billie finally found a lifeline—a ticket leading her to familiar territory. She purchased it in a hurry, her trembling hands betraying her inner turmoil. Stepping through security was surprisingly smooth, perhaps because she carried only the bare essentials.

But even amidst the chaos, her thoughts clung to Jupiter. Memories of their time together flooded her mind—the way Jupiter meticulously checked everything, the tender moments they shared, and the love that blossomed between them. The vintage Nike hat, the teal crocs Jupiter wore while taking out the trash, and the blue hoodie she had stolen from Jupiter—they all served as reminders of the love they had shared.

Regret gnawed at her insides, her decision to leave her staunchest ally beginning to haunt her. Amidst the boarding process, her thoughts fixated on one thing—Jupiter.

Jupiter, whose reaction had been peculiar. Jupiter, who didn't cry or lash out in anger. Instead, she laid down on her bed, gazing at the ceiling, a void settling within her. Jupiter missed her, missed the warmth and love that Billie brought into her life. But why was she ashamed of her love for Jupiter? Why couldn't she fully embrace it without reservation?

Unaware of Billie's impulsive departure, François entered the room and inquired about her whereabouts.

"Elle rentre à la maison," Jupiter explained softly, revealing Billie's decision to leave.

François couldn't fathom the reason behind Billie's departure. She had witnessed the depth of their connection, the way they gazed into each other's eyes, and how Jupiter made her granddaughter feel truly loved.

Billie had become the missing piece in Jupiter's heart, filling the void

that had consumed her in moments of solitude and despair.

"Jupiter, my dear, I may not fully understand the circumstances, but I do know a thing or two about love," François spoke with wisdom, her deep French accent adding weight to her words. "And when someone loves you, you don't easily let them go."

François sat down beside Jupiter on the bed, near her granddaughter's feet, offering gentle guidance. "Talk to her, Jupiter. Be understanding and compassionate. Don't let your emotions overpower you. I've seen how sometimes you lash out, only to regret it later."

Jupiter realized that releasing Billie would only perpetuate her cycle of loneliness and despair. The thought of sinking into darkness, spending endless days lost in the abyss of a tequila bottle, haunted her.

She needed a distraction. Something to take her mind elsewhere.

So she did the one thing she excelled at.

Putting on her swimsuit, she left the house and walked to the nearby lake she visited every summer. The lake she hadn't shown Billie because she left—NO, she pushed those thoughts away. Jupiter convinced herself that she wasn't worth thinking about, that she had left Jupiter like everyone else did.

Taking off her shirt and pants, she stood on the water's edge, her toes sinking into the soft sand. With a resolute determination, Jupiter jumped into the water, submerging herself in its chilly embrace. The coldness numbed her, offering a temporary respite from the weight of her emotions.

She swam with purpose, her strokes cutting through the calm surface of the lake. It wasn't a deep or vast body of water, but it held a special place in Jupiter's heart. The cold water against her skin provided a welcome distraction, temporarily whisking her away from the depths of her own thoughts.

As she moved through the water, the outside world faded away. The worries, the regrets, and the pain were momentarily suspended, replaced by the rhythmic sound of her own breathing and the serenity of the lake. In that moment, Jupiter found solace, a brief respite from the storm raging within her.