Chapter Three

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“Where there is ruin, there is hope for a treasure”

As non-existent as my relationship was with Khauhelo because of my best kept secret, I was still fine with the rest of my family. We still got along like a house on fire with all my other siblings and I was still the most well-behaved son to the parents. But that was purely because they didn’t know my secret. I started being very paranoid about a lot of things though. The thought of Khauhelo knowing made me realize that maybe it would be easier for the rest of the family to point it out, especially my mother. 

My mother, Mrs. Zuzile Mfusi, is a very sharp minded woman, very vigilant and pays attention to the littlest detail, something no one else could’ve picked up. It is impossible to keep something away from her. But she has a big heart, she has a lot of love to give and cares about everyone around her. She always wants what’s best for the whole family and so, my actions as a child really seem have been selfish, especially for someone who almost lost her life bringing me into the world. I should be more grateful to my mother. 

As a boy child, I was always a daddy’s boy, and not because I didn’t love my mom, I just preferred to be with my father, me along with all my siblings. Although dad was strict, stricter than mom, he was more fun than mom ever was. Mvelwenhle was the only one who lived under mom’s skirt, and probably still does. This hurt mom, but she was never vocal about it, as usual, Mvelo was the one to pick it up. How we would lock ourselves up in our rooms whenever dad was at work and as soon as he would come back, we were with him, whether he was working in the study, or doing anything around the house. Khauhelo would always ask him to read her stories, instead of mom, and all of those things hurt her feelings. 

That week of her twelfth birthday, she had her first period, she couldn’t run to dad, she had to tell mom. All that happened after Mvelo had sat her down and confronted her about our behavior towards mom. It could’ve been a very sour weekend for everyone if things didn’t go as planned, but mom sorted everything out and she had a lovely birthday. In the midst of it all, we also fixed our relationship with mom, and everything went back to being hunky dory. 

When I was sure about my sexuality, I didn’t want to be around mom for too long, because if I did, I know for sure she would have pick it out. Not that I was acting any different to my normal character, but you know how it feels like to have a secret; it always feels like everyone around you can see through you. I was definitely not ready for her reaction, I wasn’t ready for anyone’s reaction, especially after I saw Khauhelo’s and how we drifted apart after that. I knew that if mom found out, the whole family would know in a split second. So approximately 2 weeks after Khauhelo found out, I asked dad to loan me money. 

Yes, I had to loan money from my own father, but it was the best decision. I would take that R100,000 and go buy myself a flat in Durban. That’s exactly what I did. It was far from home, but I realized it was towards the end of the year and I was close to rewriting my exams. After that I was set to go to university, and I was accepted at UKZN. That was the excuse I gave them, and I’m glad they didn’t fight me about it, I mean at some point they were going to have to give me my independence, I was almost 20 then. 

When I got to Durban, I felt free. I could do whatever I wanted with no parental guidance. If I was another child, tasting freedom for the first time, I would’ve strayed. But I didn’t, I studied hard, got my grades high and made my family proud of the son they raised. Three years later, I got my degree and when I did, I had access to my inheritance that my grandfather left for me. I could finally buy myself a proper place to live and also, a car of my choice. I love cars, today, I have a collection of about five cars, and I’m working towards getting more. 

I started off at Mthiyane Construction as an intern because that’s where we all start out, as interns and we work our way up. When Mvelo stepped down as CEO to start his own company alongside his wife, I amongst many other candidates in the company ran for the position. I was the youngest amongst the group, but my hard work and dedication got me the spot. I was hated because people felt I had the upper hand, that because I was a Mfusi, and it was once upon a time, my fathers’ company. I didn’t care about all those things, I knew how hard I worked to get there, and so I wouldn’t let them get to me. 

They also had a problem with me when I grew a thick skin and became that boss that didn’t laugh with anyone. They gave me names like: Meanie and Msizi Junior. Msizi is my fathers’ older brother, the first born of the brothers. He was raised under such a stern hand that he grew up being considered a mean person, only because he was never given the platform to express himself. You were lucky to see Bab’ Msizi smile, it only happened once in a blue moon. Even his own father, the one who instilled all this teaching, told him before he died to smile more. He listened; after Mamncane Nozipho came along, he smiled more, he laughed, and he actually looked happy. 

Dad on the other hand, was a different story. He was the last born of the family, and he was treated like one. The egg of the family. All his flaws and mistakes were excused because he is Bipolar. Granny and Mummy treated him like a precious egg until their last days; may God rest their souls. 

Deep down inside my heart, I knew I was nothing like Bab’Msizi, but I kept that to myself. I used that as an advantage, as a mask to hide my sexuality. My ability to be like him worked in my favour. It worked in my favour only until I knew I was in love. You can never run away from love, there was no way to hide now.

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