The Brick Wall

Chapter 16

Curtis POV

  The woman in front of me would have no idea how deep her assessment of me actually cuts. The assumption of 'no name needed to enjoy a good time' hits too close to home, especially where the little girl down the hall is concerned. 

  The nervousness I felt just a mere moment ago at the door has faded, replaced by agitation. I try to remind myself not to be upset towards her, she has no clue that she hit the nail smack on the head.  But my jaw goes tight and I can feel my body squaring up. 

  "It's Collins, by the way. Collins Kennedy," she tells me while she attempts to get comfortable. 

  I know the correct response would be something gentlemanly, a 'nice to meet you, Collins Kennedy,' or something to the effect. Not the spew of aggravated venom that I keep swallowing down. 

  She's somewhat opened a door, an opportunity for me to get to know her a bit more than just the woman down the hall whom my daughter happens to adore.

  Lennox is a baby, she'd probably love everyone, even Thaddeus Horn.

  However, after the simple cut she's made into my metaphorical flesh, I'm not interested in a door. I'm not interested in getting to know her. So, I respond as such. "Night."

  I don't give her a blanket although I'm pretty sure one of Lennox's little baby blankets are hanging over a kitchen chair from earlier. She came right in and made herself to home so I'm sure she'll go snooping if she hasn't already.

  There's nothing around this apartment that will tell her anything she doesn't already know. It's me and my daughter. Period. End of story. No sordid details for her to go digging through and strum up any information that she might could throw in my face for no apparent reason.

  No apparent reason? Seriously, Curtis.

  I fall back onto my bed with such force that the headboard rams against the wall. I hold my breath, silently cursing myself because it's on the same wall as Lennox's bedroom. Thirty seconds pass and there's no noise coming from the monitor, allowing me to exhale and relax again.

  My mind however doesn't shut up. There's one half of my brain that wants to continue staying closed off, while the other reminds me I wasn't always this way.  I'd like to say they tend to stay at war with one another, but really, it's only been over the last couple of weeks that the debate has began screaming loudly.  

  This time last year I was going out with the guys after every game, having a few beers, maybe some shots and see where the night would lead. Most nights I'd find a little fun at the bar or club, occasionally continue it at home. I felt carefree. The only person I had to worry about was myself, outside of my mother.  I'd wear out my body on the ice whether it be for a game or practices, and let a woman soothe my sore muscles after.  

  That was the time I was an open book. "Maybe we could do this again sometime?" would be the question on most women's lips before ducking into an Uber or their own car. My answer could range from "Maybe" to "You bet."  Both being viable options. And for the ones I knew I'd never want to see again it was a simple "I'm not looking for a relationship right now." 

  See. Open book.

  But then Lennox. 

  Lennox changed literally everything about my mind set. As much as I fought the idea of being a father, and I did, at this point I can't imagine my life without the little butter ball. But she's my priority.  No one gets brought into her life without proper vetting. 

  Or so I thought.

  Then Miss Nelson goes and makes a decision for me, without me, and throws the two of us into the midst of someone else's life. Well, maybe more like invites someone else into our lives because now Lennox is just ga-ga for the woman who I now know as Collins Kennedy.

  I don't purposely set out to be rude to her, but she's not exactly helping the situation either. I swear her brain must be on overdrive constantly, probably no filter between her thoughts and her mouth. 

  Tonight was suppose to be easy. Come home, have a quick conversation about a bookshelf before Collins left. Give Lennox a bath, eat some food and then for myself to relax in the tub and let the warmth of the water ease my damn aching muscles from a grueling practice today, then fall into a restless sleep all the while praying my little angel would sleep through the night.

  But as I hear the baby's soft whimpers, I realize not a single expectation for the night is going to go off without a hitch.  My hand scrubs down my face, over the bristles of my beard while I sit up on the edge of the bed.  I don't grab the monitor, because what's the sense in that, and creep out of my room and into the baby's.  

  Lennox is laying on her back, kicking her hands and feet around and I see what I believe to be the problem.  She maybe nearing eight months old but she still loves to be swaddled as though she was a newborn.  But with a dad that's over six foot, she's too big to be using a normal swaddling blanket, as evidence is proving right now. 

  "Did you go all Hulk on your swaddle, Lenny Lou?" I ask. All the exhaustion in the world I could be feeling doesn't matter when I see her little chunky hands reach up and grab towards me. "We gotta find you a bigger blanket, baby." 

  I scoop her up into my arms, knowing if I walk away and go hunting around the apartment she'll just start to wail. On the off chance that our night's guest is actually asleep, I'd rather not disturb her and find out what other crappy discord we can sew together.

  With a pacifier between her lips, Lennox's hands start beating on my chest happily as we walk through the hallway.  I put one finger over my lips as though she'll understand that I need her to be quiet. But, my girl's smart for her age. 

  Lord knows she probably gets that from her mom. Whoever, and wherever, she is. 

  We look in the small hall closet, only finding a blanket that would definitely be too big for swaddling. I check my own bedroom and come up empty. Then I remember the one hanging over the chair in the kitchen. "Gotta be super quiet, alright?"  I get a grin in response, the pacifier threatening to fall right out of her little mouth.

  I tiptoe through the rest of the apartment, taking note of Collins whose body is turned towards the back of the couch. I'm unsure how she'd gotten comfortable enough to sleep on the old thing, but more power to her.  Once in the kitchen I grab up the blanket and begin retreating back to Lenny's room.  She's apparently not a fan of this plan and takes the paci from her mouth and throws it to the floor. 

  I bite back scolding her because I don't want to wake our guest. But as soon as I take a step closer to her room she balls up her fists and screams, her little face turning red.  My steps pick up speed allowing me to duck into her bedroom and shut the door.  

  "No ma'am. That is unacceptable." I set her in the crib while digging through her dresser to find another pacifier.  She doesn't appreciate the loss of my arms and makes her annoyance clear to anyone within a three mile radius.  My hand finally finds the plastic cork in the midst of her socks and I'm swiftly popping it into her mouth as I lay out the blanket. 

  My angel baby is turning into a demon child right before my eyes.  She's fighting me every step of the way as I do my best to wrap her up like a little burrito, the same way all the Youtube videos directed me.  Her hands refuse to stay down and she keeps rolling back and forth trying to get away from me.

  "Work with me, Len," I beg, pleading with her every time I have to move her back onto the fuzzy green blanket.  At this point I'm guessing our house guest must be dead to the world to not be banging on the bedroom door, demanding peace and quiet. 

  I'm five seconds away from throwing up my arms and giving up, residing myself to another night of no sleep. "Is it your gums again, baby? You cutting more of those painful teeth?"

  "No," I hear quietly behind me. "She's hungry."

  Collins walks past me, scoops up my daughter whose fingers are pulling a bottle of formula up to her mouth. Her little lips begin moving as though she's ravenous.  I stand back in awe, looking at both of them.  "How'd you know?"

  "It's not my first rodeo," she answers calmly, walking back into the living room all the while coddling my little girl.

*Unedited