The Brick Wall

Chapter 70

Collins POV

  "So, when will you start?"

  It's been a week since Ace offered me the little gig at Legends. I'd continued mulling it over, even though the idea of putting myself a little more into the real world with an actual paying job gave me a bit more pep in my step. 

  Curtis, however, has continued to tell me everything will be fine and to stop worrying my already overactive brain about it. Apparently he's gone a step further and been discussing it with his mom who is sitting next to me in the front seat of Curtis' truck.

  "If I take it," I start, pulling out of her driveway in Norfolk, "I'll go in the Tuesday night after the trip. But, I haven't decided."

  "I don't understand why not. You've got the voice. You've got the presence." My eyes flick to her, wondering how she knows about stage presence. "Oh, please," she waves me off. "Curtis sent me a video that night. I watch it at least once a day, or any time I need a pick me up of 'bad ass female' energy."

  Her smile is genuine, but a bit weak.  Dottie enjoyed her little trip to keep Lennox while we flew to Dallas, but she had to hit heavy treatments when she returned. Curtis told her that maybe it wasn't the right time for a family vacation where there would be a lot of walking and sightseeing, but she shut that down quick.  I believe her words were "I don't know how many more opportunities there will be. Better take them while I can."

  He admitted to me those words left an uneasy feeling in his chest. I told him they were probably pretty sour in her mouth. It was my reassurance that I'd keep an eye on her, pick her up and drive her into D.C., that made him concede and agree to keeping the original plan. 

  I glance in the rearview mirror, giving me a chance to check on Len. The little stuffed mirror that sits across from her gives me the glimpse of what I expected. Her little heart shaped mouth is puckered with a small little opening for the tiniest bit of baby drool to escape. She's sound asleep.

  A pregnant pause passes between Dottie and I, my heart aching. There's a tingle in my nose and it feels like my throat may close as I try to speak why I'm hesitant.

  "I don't want to leave her."

  I slow the truck down at a red light just before we're inching closer to the highway.

  "Collins." Dottie's voice is filled with loving warmth as her hand reaches over to pull one of mine from the wheel. "Leaving her for a few hours a day doesn't make you a terrible girlfriend."

  I press the accelerator, slipping my hand out of hers to put all my focus on the road ahead of me. I hear her mumble something and ask her to repeat herself.

  She rings her hands in her lap. Out of the corner of my eye I see her shake her head like she's trying to convince herself not to tell me what she said. 

  "GaGa. Talk to me," I plead with her.

  A little chuckle fills the cab of the truck, quiet enough that it doesn't wake my angel. "You're terrified to not be around her for a few hours a week, yet her mother dropped her off and walked away months ago." Her laugh grows louder, making me wonder if she might've been smoking a little medical marijuana for her pain before I picked her up.

  Because why else would she find that situation comical? I know she can't find her granddaughter being dropped off on her son's doorstep as a funny story. It's not possible that she is laughing at the fact that her granddaughter hasn't seen her mother in seven months. And there's certainly nothing funny with how no one knows who her mom is. 

  "I'm failing to see how laughable this is to you." I'm tempted to pull of the side of the road and call Curtis to talk to her. He'd be the one to let me know if she was indeed high or not and whether we should continue this trip since his daughter is in the backseat. 

  "It seriously gives me anxiety when I think about leaving her with someone new," I admit further.

  "Pull over," she tells me, still laughing. It's almost uncontrollable before I can get the truck onto the shoulder of the highway.

  I pull off further than I normally would and nearly  jerk her back into the seat when she opens the passenger side door but she's too quick. "I swear, Dottie. If you're not in your right mind," I mutter, grabbing my cell phone. My finger is hovering over Curtis' name, although now I'm wondering if I should be calling 9-1-1 instead.

  When I see her laughing turn into what looks like hysterics, she actually stumbles and lands on her butt. I look over my shoulder at Lennox, who thankfully is still oblivious to her grandmother's antics, and slip out the passenger side as well. 

  "Are you alright?" I ask, still mentally trying to decide which phone call to place. I crouch down next to her, noticing tears streaming down her face all the while a smile is plastered to her lips. "Dottie!" I shout, trying to be heard over the passing cars doing seventy miles an hour. "Are you high?"

  My questions causes her to stop her peels of laughter abruptly. "What? Are you serious right now, CaCa?"

  I roll my eyes at the nickname. "Are you?" I repeat. "It's fine if you are, I know the pain and nausea has been rough lately. I just need to know whether to continue north or go back to your house."

  She sighs, swiping at the tears that have left trails on her cheeks. "You really don't get it, do you?"  I stare back at her, bewildered. "I'm laughing at the irony of the situation, sweetheart. Your heart is conflicted over taking a job that will cut down your time with the baby, when her own mother left her forever. You have zero blood ties to that little girl," she points at the truck behind us, "yet you love her as though you carried her under your heart. You're already so much better than what she started her life with, Collins. But it's alright for you to have something for yourself as well. I know you've at least got to pay rent. Unless you're ready to move into the apartment across the hall?" Her lip curls into a challenge, maybe trying to see if our talk a week ago has changed anything between her son and I. 

  I don't play into her question.  Instead I decide a tease of my own. "I'm sure he'd love a live in babysitter, but-"

  "No, baby. He'd love a wife and mother."

  

*Unedited

*Sorry it's short. Might delete later.