Crave (Severus Snape x reader)

Chapter 19

Your heart skipped a beat upon hearing that you and Severus had been summoned to Dumbledore's office. You both exchanged worried glances, fearing the worst. You entered his office, your nerves on edge, ready to hear what he had to say but the wariness in Dumbledore's expression only panicked you more as he conveyed the gravity of the situation. "Please, come in." The headmaster motioned for you both to sit and took a moment to compose himself before speaking. His voice held a mix of sorrow, fear and determination. "Y/n, Severus, I need to discuss something with you which must be held under absolute secrecy. This is a matter of urgency and something that has only been heard in rumours, but unfortunately it has now been proven correct. I regret to inform you that the Dark Lord has returned."

Shock coursed through your veins, mingling with the dread that already clutched at your heart. Your unborn child was now at risk, your once seemingly safe world seemingly crumbling around you. Severus all but looked forward, his eyes still fixated on Dumbledore as if trying to process his words. Your voice trembled with concern, a tear forming in your eye. "W-what will happen to us? We cannot allow our child to be caught in the midst of this chaos." Your hand rested on your baby bump which was now prominently showing.

Dumbledore met your gazes with unwavering seriousness. "I understand your apprehension, but you must believe that I will do everything in my power to protect you both and your child. This is a time of great danger, but it is also a time for hope and resistance."

"But what does he want?"

"Harry Potter."

Hearing Harry's name, Severus' eye twitched slightly.

"Why?" You asked. "What could he possibly need from a student?"

"A part of Voldemort lives inside him." Dumbledore admitted.

Severus finally spoke. "So when the time comes, the boy must die?"

"Yes. Yes, he must die."

"You've raised him like a pig for slaughter!" You shouted. You didn't really know Harry other than seeing him occasionally on the halls at Hogwarts. But you knew you couldn't bare to see him die.

"It's the only way to defeat the Dark Lord." Dumbledore retracted.

You couldn't believe what you were hearing and things were only about to get worse.

"Severus, I trust you are still meeting with the Death Eaters?" Dumbledore questioned.

"I am." He responded, not daring to look at you. "However, I fear their trust in me has wavered as I wasn't made aware that he was at full strength yet."

Severus had been meeting with the Death Eaters? It felt like everything you thought you knew had been a lie. A lie about the man you loved. How could he not tell you? How could he endanger yours and your unborn child's life like this?
Your heart began pounding uncontrollably, almost like it was trying escape your chest. Your breathing began to struggle as you found it hard to catch your breath, body trembling as a tidal wave of fear and anxiety began taking hold of you. Your thoughts raced, ricocheting against each other like pinballs in your mind. Everything felt distorted and overwhelming, as if your senses were heightened to the point of overload. You clutched at your chest, fingers nails digging into your skin, hoping to ground yourself in some semblance of reality as your vision became blurred, and a sense of detachment settled in. It was as if you were standing on the outskirts of your own body, observing the chaos unfolding within. The world became an intimidating labyrinth of triggers and uncertainties.
Every sound was heightened, each flicker of light intensified, and the world around you had become too sharp and piercing. You were trapped in a turbulent storm, unable to find refuge or calm.

"Y/n?" You could hear someone talking, shouting for you. "Y/n!" You finally registered that it was Dumbledore. Your eyes snapped to him, worry painting it's way across his face. Noticing the colour draining from you he darted to your side. "Focus on my voice, y/n." His frail hands touching your shaking ones. "Breathe." He whispered to you, tears now falling freely down your cheeks as you tried to listen to him. "Severus. She needs you, she's having a panic attack." You shook your head, still unable to process what was happening.

Severus knelt down in front you, taking Dumbledores place, and placed a hand on your leg, trying to calm your shaking body, your eyes now staring into his. "Y/n, darling, I need you to try and calm down." His voice was the softest you'd ever heard it. "Breathe with me." Snape began to breathe slowly in and back out again, you copied this action, finding a soft and soothing rhythm in it. "Good girl." He continued breathing with you and bit by bit, the panic attack loosened its grip. Your body began to relax, and your mind settled into a more serene state. The storm within began to dissipate, leaving behind a residue of exhaustion mingled with relief.

"Please, can you explain to me why you've been meeting with Death Eaters. And more importantly why you didn't tell me!" You managed to say.

Severus placed a hand on your face. "I have been meeting with them for a while now. Dumbledore appointed me to so I could gather intel. I have been reporting back my knowledge to help win the war that would inevitably come. I wanted to tell you, please believe that I did, but it was for your protection that I didn't." His eyes were so full of sadness and you believed him.

"Show me." You said.

Severus understood what you meant and slowly lifted his left arm sleeve revealing the Death Eater tattoo on his arm. You gulped.

"How haven't I seen this before?" Confusion showing itself in your voice.

"I used an enchantment to hide it." He admitted. "Please understand, it was for yours and our child's safety that you didn't know." He reassured.

You threw your arms round him, almost knocking him to the floor in his kneeling position.

"I love you, y/n." He breathed a sigh of relief. "I would never do anything to hurt you or our baby."

"I love you too." You completely understood why Severus had kept this from you, but you wished that it hadn't been his burden to bare alone. What he had done could have endangered his life, what if he had been found to be a spy? It didn't even bare thinking about.

I can't loose you. What would we do without you?

"I'm not going anywhere." He smiled and kissed the top of your head.

Severus sat back in his chair and leaned forward, his expression now filled with urgency. "What can we do, Dumbledore? How can we shield our child from this impending darkness?"

Dumbledore placed a hand on Severus's shoulder, his eyes filled with determination. "You both have shown immense courage and determination in the face of adversity. I have witnessed your strength, Severus, and I know that your love for y/n and your child will drive you to do whatever it takes to keep them safe."

Your eyes glistened with tears as you looked from Dumbledore to Severus. "But can you promise us, Dumbledore? Can you promise that you will protect us?"

Dumbledore's gaze softened, his voice resolute. "I give you my word, my dear, that I will protect you both with my life. Hogwarts will become a fortress, a stronghold against the encroaching darkness. You have my unwavering support and the resources of the Order of the Phoenix at your disposal. Together, we will fight for a future where your child can grow in peace, where they do not have to face the horrors of this war. I will not allow the darkness to consume what you hold most."

You felt a glimmer of hope ignite within you, a spark of determination to protect your growing family. You and Severus exchanged a resolute look, drawing strength from one another and from Dumbledore's unwavering commitment.

As you left Dumbledore's office, your anxiety began to morph into a sense of resolve. You knew the path ahead would be treacherous, but you were determined to face it head-on. With Dumbledore's promise and the support of those fighting against the darkness, you both would do whatever it took to keep your child safe and protect the future you so desperately longed for.

In your heart, you knew that the love you had for one another and for your unborn child would be their greatest weapon against the encroaching darkness. No matter what challenges lay ahead, you were ready to face them head-on, united and resolute.