as the world falls down

chapter 22

Mina: When are you coming back? It’s getting late.

Y/n: Sorry, I have been put on the night watch. I should have called you earlier.

Mina: Just leave. I miss you.

Y/n: I’m sorry, I can’t.

Mina: I’m so bored. Ever since Sehun and Chan left for vacation I have had nothing to do. Can I go down to the corner shop for some cigs?

Y/n: Sure but keep your head low. Bring the gun with you.

Mina: Please come home. I’ve barely seen you all week.

Y/n: No.

Mina: How about now? 1 photo attached

Y/n: Put your bra back on and stop acting like a child. I miss you too but I’m working.

Mina: Is it so bad that I just want to spend time with you? Why is this more important than me?

Y/n: I still owe Jungkook.

Mina: You don’t owe him anything. Stop blaming yourself for your friend's death.

Y/n: And the organisation knows who you are. If I fuck up you could be in danger.

Mina: You never should have gone back.

Y/n: I had to get you out from prison. Everything has a price.

Mina: Stop being so cryptic.

Y/n: We have this small argument every night. I will try to get off as early as I can, how about when I come home we go out for food?

Mina: Ok. Keep yourself safe.

Y/n: You too. I love you.

Mina: I love you too.

Mina slammed her phone down on to the sofa and let out an audible groan. She pulled her arms into the chest to combat the cold chill that was spreading around the dark apartment. This night was a harsh and cold one- one that was now apparent she was going to have to spend alone. She used the moonlight seeping through the drawn curtains as a guide and picked up her discarded discoloured hoodie and pulled it over her head, making her already messy hair frizz with static. Mina fell back onto the itchy grey couch and stared up at the ceiling placing a cigarette between her lips, she flicked the switch, her finger hurting as she tried to light the flame. The orange fire lit up her face as she put it to her mouth and inhaled the smoke, desperate to feel the nicotine rush in her veins to calm her buzzing nerves.

Her eyes started to droop as she mindlessly watched the flashing colours on the TV, she didn’t even know what was playing, she just let the sounds crawl into her ears and intoxicate her with tiredness. Her heart felt heavy, she had no motivation for anything.

The one person who could make her feel better wasn’t here.

She was never here. She was out killing people, a pointless job that does nothing but create more negative force in the world.

It was selfish of her to wish for Y/n to be around more but she couldn’t help it. Mina felt terrible every second of the day, she felt like she had hit rock bottom and there was no coming back. Everyday it felt like a new worse, the drugs gave her a fun rush but the crash left her shittier than ever; but she couldn’t stop, her body wouldn’t let her. The only time she felt normal was when Y/n was around.

But once again, she wasn’t here. Mina had to fall asleep alone, passed out from all of the mind numbing substances she used to keep herself sane.

She was far from happy, in fact she’d forgotten what it even felt like. She remembered being happy when Y/n proposed, running her engagement thing over her hand made her re-live the memory but she still couldn’t feel happiness from it, her mind blocked her from feeling joy from anything that wasn’t drugs. Although as always, Y/n defied those rules.