Just read ig
Age:20
WC: 1k
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My love mine all mine by mitski
I'm laying in my hospital bed knowing I have only exactly an hour to live and Matt is sitting with me bawling both of us can't leave each other I need him and he needs me.
I just hope he is ok after I'm gone I hope he finds someone else and not stop his self from loving because of me. I squeeze his hand "hey it will be ok I promise" I say to him sniffing.
"No it want y/n I need you" he says with red and puffy eyes. "I know Matt but I'll always be here don't worry I'll watch over you all the time I promise" I say tearing up again
(I'm sad rn so I'm writing this depressing thing sorry)
"Please I can't" he says I pat the bed and he gets in cuddling closer to me crying and I feel tears run down my neck causing me to cry to but I try to keep them in and rub his back.
A hour turned to 50 minutes 40 minutes 30 minutes 20 minutes 10 minutes 5 minutes to 1.
"Y/n no no please just stay please" he begs "I can't do that baby im sorry" I say leaning in to kiss him one last time he kisses me back but immediately crying again.
"So when I die I just hope it's not dark done there I hope it shines and Matt I love you so much baby" I say before everything is black.
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Matt pov
I bawl "no it can't be" I say looking at her the nurses comes in trying to comfort me but nothing works nick and Chris comes and there eyes are red and puffy to.
They come hugging me immediately i bawl y/n was the only reason I was still living on this earth.
If It wasn't for her I'd be gone right now she kept me through things she keeps me going trying harder she helped me with so many things and she's gone.
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Its been a 1 week since y/n passed and her funeral is tomorrow and I'm getting ready to go to bed but I look at a my favorite picture of me and y/n biting my lip trying to not let tears slip I put my phone away and I go to sleep
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"Hey baby" y/n says smiling and kissing my temple i smile kissing her she smiles in it pulling way pecking my lips.
"Y/n please come back" i say "I can't" she says sadly "please I'll come with you" i say "please Matt don't do that live please for me" she says "but-"
"Not but live ok you have much more in life Matt I promise you have dreams to do with your brothers" she says smiling "but I want to be with you" i say "you can't do that right now baby" she says holding my cheek she kisses me and I hold her waist she soon fades.
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I wake up soon after going back to crying once again shes really gone like gone never coming back gone.
Chris walks in seeing me "hey Matt it's ok" he says sitting beside my rubbing my back and hugging me i bawl as he holds me close.
"Hey come we have to get ready" he says and that Just makes me bawl more "Chris I don't think I can see her today it's I just-" i say but Chris cuts me off "hey hey it's ok I promise I'll be there for you the whole way and Nick ok" he says and I nod.
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I got ready and now I'm in the car letting Chris drive since I can't (he Can drive for the sake of this imagine)
We make it to the funeral.
We go in I see her casket but not her and that was even enough to make me cry. Nick hugs me rubbing my back then y/n's mom comes over and she just pulls me in the tightest hug.
"I'm so sorry sweetie she loved you so much" she says kissing my head and i bawl more.
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It's time to go see her body and I'm with my mom she grabs my hand as she walks with me and we're next to see her. I walk up seeing her I freeze looking at her lifeless body. I lean down kissing her cheek since it would be my last I come back up walking out of the funeral quickly.
I run till I can't anymore and I made it to the car. I can't breath I start breathing heavy. I start crying choking on my breath and my hands start to shake a lot and I slide down the car door putting my head in my knees and I try to breathe but I can't it's hard
Please this can't happen right now y/n helped me with a lot of things "hey baby breath ok" y/n says how is this happening am I imagining things "you can do this remember ok" she says fading once again
Nick and Chris run over "hey hey breathe it's ok please breath" Chris says and I try but can't I feel like my lungs are closing my vision goes cloudy "hey hey breath please for me for y/n" he says
I remember what y/n said And I breathe in and out it's hard but I manage and soon enough I'm breathing not regular but enough not to suffocate.
I have really deep breath and sniffles. And my brothers embrace me in a hug.
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3 years later
"Hi y/n happy birthday your 23" I say placing down some flowers sitting at y/n grave. I place my phone on her grave and play her favorite movie and I starts watching it tearing up a little bit then I remember she's in a better place.
I just hope she's ok and it's not dark where she is.
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I'm sorry for giving y'all this sad chapter but I'm sad and that what my mind came up to so yea
I literally just wrote this and I'm publishing it now something I never did
