What's Said in Silence

Vessel-XXXXIII

Ah! Dammit!

She had made herself cupcakes for her own birthday. Honestly, if she hadn't done that, I might not have ever known it was her birthday. I wasn't one to celebrate my own birthday so the thought of hers hadn't really crossed my mind. Still though, no one should have to make their own damn cupcakes. 

Shit!

The guilt I felt once I realized I had spent most of her birthday out in the woods, contemplating my own mundane problems, had nearly made me sick. Then again, I hadn't known and it became increasingly more obvious how little I knew about her. 

Fucking hell!

I ran my hand under cold water for the seventh time since I stepped foot in the kitchen. Granted, it had been a long time since I last touched a stove, but I still hadn't expected to burn myself this much. I kept my hand there until the stinging fully subsided before shutting the water off. 

I poked my head around the corner and looked towards where the light spilled from my bedroom doorway. Her shadow danced across the ground, which meant she was still putting the clothes away and hadn't caught onto what I was up to. I ducked back and continued to read the recipe on my phone. 

The casserole had seemed almost like childs-play from how the instructions made it out to be, and it sounded delicious enough to be worth a shot. I was well aware my kitchen skills were no force to be reckoned with, but I hadn't thought I'd get my arse kicked by some pasta and ground beef. 

I had finally gotten all the components of the dish ready to be combined. I poured everything in a large glass bowl and began mixing it together, spilling some over the sides in the process. I turned to grab a napkin from the bar and came face to face with wide blue eyes.

"Shit!" A jolt ran through my body at her sudden appearance. Typically, I was able to hear her footsteps from a mile away, but she had managed to enter the room completely unnoticed. I steadied my breathing as quickly as I could, but not before a grin broke across Sera's face. 

"Seems as though I've likened you to a fox a little too much." I joked, still waiting on my heart rate to return to normal. She peered past me to the casserole dish still waiting on the stove and quirked an eyebrow at it before her eyes darted back to me. A simple facial expression shouldn't be so damn sexy, but it would seem anything she did stirred desires within me.

"I, uh" I turned to the dish and picked it up, placing it in the oven and setting a timer. "I'm making dinner." Her eyes narrowed and she cocked her head to the side, but the small grin stayed. 

"For, ah, for you." I cleared my throat. "For your birthday. I didn't get you a gift, and getting one after the fact seemed disingenuous, but I wanted to do something for you." I mentally kicked myself, pleading my mouth to stop rambling. "So, I made you dinner- am making you dinner."  

Silence fell between us like a thick blanket. My palms grew clammy and my face ran hot but I blamed that on the stove making the kitchen a few degrees hotter. Something shifted in her eyes and they glossed over like glass. I zeroed in on a tiny bead of moisture building up in her right eye. 

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The bead grew  and grew, sitting right on the edge of her lower lid, threatening to spill over. I rested my hands on the bar and leaned forward. Call me a psychopath but I wanted to watch it fall. I wanted to evoke every emotion possible out of her and I wanted to witness it first hand. It was my way of learning her, my only way of learning her. 

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The moisture began to recede and she blinked it away. Reality slowly came back into focus and I realized the timer had been going off. I quickly donned some oven mitts and reached into the oven, pulling the hot dish out and using my knee to close the oven door.

I spooned out the casserole onto two plates and prepped the table. After I had gotten silverware, two glasses of water, and had ensured the oven was off, I took a seat. Only this time, purely by accident, I sat in Sera's usual seat and she sat in mine. It felt strange, but I tried to brush it off. Sera seemed to be feeling the same way, because she sat there with her lips pressed in a tight line before looking up at me. 

Simultaneously, we slid our plates across the bar and got up to swap seats. Our hands brushed briefly as we passed each other and that familiar current nestled deep into my nervous system. I have touched nearly every inch, caressed every curve of this woman, and still, the slightest of touches affected me this much. 

Once we were sat in our respective seats, we stabbed our forks into the pasta and took the first bite. At first, it wasn't bad and I thought I might have outdone myself, but once the flavor of the cheese disappeared, all that was left was bland meat and pasta noodles. I dared a glance upward at Sera. If she abhorred the dish as much as I did, she needed an award for how well she hid it. 

Thinking that maybe I just didn't like casseroles, I kept eating. Trying not to gag on the flavorless pasta. A few more bites and I couldn't stand it any more. Something wasn't right about this dish, and I couldn't be the only one of us who noticed it. 

I looked up from my plate. Sera looked at me with a polite expression on her face and it became blatantly obvious that she hated the meal too. She had kept eating for the sole preservation of my ego. Her eyes cast downward as she continued. I mentally cursed myself and looked down at my own plate, suppressing another gag. Even the look of the food had begun to make me nauseous. 

I shifted my gaze around the room, looking for anything to distract both of us from the horrendous meal. My eyes landed on something rather important sitting next to the microwave and a low curse fell from my mouth, gaining Sera's attention.

"I forgot the sauce." I sighed, embarrassment rising in my cheeks. 

Her brows knitted together before she turned to follow my gaze and found the unopened jar of pasta sauce sitting on the counter. A beat of silence passed as we both stared at the damned jar, before she broke it with a snort. Her shoulders shook violently as she fought to hold in her laughter, but it was no use, snorts were slipping out of her left and right. She finally turned back towards me, her face beet red and her hand over her mouth, still quaking with silent laughter. 

A grin spread across my own face as a chuckle slipped free, before full out laughter broke loose. Even though there wasn't a sound to it, her laugh was contagious. My sides began to hurt and I tried to breathe deep to calm myself, just to fall right back into another fit of laughs. Eventually, though, the laughing did subside and we sat there grinning at one another.

"How does Chinese sound?"