Maidens & Killers

If You Were Mine

     Silence hangs heavily in the doorway of my room.
“What do you mean?” I ask softly.
Garrick  blows out a breath I didn’t realize he had been holding and pushes off the wall. Before I even realize what has happened I am pressed against my door, my body in a cage of Garrick’s arms with his hands pressed to the door on both sides of my head.
“GARRICK!?” I exclaim, widening my eyes in surprise.
“You don’t seem to get it, you’re all I fucking think about. I TRY so hard to ignore you, Xaden says that he needs me more than ever right now, that we can’t both be distracted, but I PHYSICALLY can’t stop thinking about you. I’ve tried everything and then you walk around the corner with these green eyes that I swear to Malek see straight into my soul, or whatever I have left of one.  And that ass! I’m pretty sure the sight of your ass in those leathers will haunt me for the rest of my life. But I can't do a damn thing about it! It would be the stupidest thing I have ever done to involve you in my life. You’re so…. perfect and my life is so fucking ugly and dangerous that I can’t do that to you. Plus you think you’re in love with some absolute IDIOT who lets you join the rider’s quadrant without him!”
Garrick doesn’t appear to be stopping anytime soon so I butt in quickly.
“Hey now, no one lets me do anything! I don’t need a man to take care of me, that’s my sister’s thing.”  I say pushing on Garrick’s chest.
Garrick’s hulking body isn’t budging as I push his chest unsurprisingly, he just sighs and slightly shakes his head.
“No, you don’t need a man to take care of you, and that’s sexy as hell. I don’t want to take care of you Maeve, not in the way you think at least. But if you were mine, I would never have let you join without anyone in your corner. If you were mine, you would always know who was right behind you, you’d never have to watch your back because I’ve got it. You wouldn’t have to figure everything out on your own, because I’ve been there. “ Garricks eyes darken to smoldering before he speaks again, “You would NEVER have to take care of yourself in bed at night, because satisfied is the bare minimum I would accept Maeve. If you were mine, I wouldn’t be able to get enough of you. I lay awake at night wondering what you sound like when you come,  I count the many ways I can elicit the most animalistic sounds out of you. You try so hard to keep this calm demeanor, and I want to shatter it like glass. I want you wild and crazed and screaming for me.”

      At some point in Garrick's passionate speech I close my eyes, listening to the delicious words coming from his exquisite mouth. When he stops speaking I open them again and what I see sends a shot of electricity right to my already dampening core.
Garrick looks a bit crazed himself right now. Dark smoldering eyes softly look upon me , and tense muscles surround me. I never knew that someone’s eyes could look that dangerous and also that soft at the same time.
Slowly, I raise my hand to cup his cheek. His breath catches, but he allows himself to lean lightly into my touch.
“I don’t know what to say. Ofcourse, I feel what’s between us. But you just gave a lot of reasons why we shouldn’t do this and I’d have to agree. I think right now, it would be a mistake. You are getting ready to graduate and you won’t be here next year and as much as that terrifies me, you have to focus on things other than me. I need to figure out this thing with Soren, I think.”

      Garrick closes his eyes for a moment and nods, “I’m so sorry for unloading this on you.”
I shake my head, “Look at me Garrick Tavis.”
Garrick’s eyes fly open so I continue, “Do not ever apologize for telling me how you feel. You are the sole person that I  truly trust here right now, and we have to be able to talk to each other.”
There is so much desire etched onto Garrick’s face it is making my knees weak. He bites his bottom lip, and sucks it into his mouth in a way that is doing nothing for my heartrate. “I know it’s a bad idea, but could I just kiss you? I just need to feel something for a minute.”
I smile up at him, but internally I am suddenly incredibly nervous, “I’ve only ever kissed Soren, I may not be good at it.”
Garrick scoffs, “That is actually not possible.”

        We hold eye contact for a few breathless seconds before I nod my head ever so slightly. Will I regret this? Possibly. Am I going to do it anyways? Yes.
Garrick thankfully moves towards me, as I am pretty sure a mix of my door and his arms are the only things holding me up. It surely isn’t my traitorous knees. My hand is still cupping his face though, so in a way it gives me the illusion that I am controlling this. I know without a shadow of a doubt, if I changed my mind right now, If I said stop right now, Garrick would give himself whiplash with how quickly he stopped.
I don’t change my mind though, in fact I encourage him by using what strength I have left in my body and lean towards him.

       I know the moment that our lips make contact, despite the fact that my eyes have fluttered almost closed. It’s like lightning during a rainstorm, it shocks you at first but you immediately lean into its beauty. When Garrick finally kisses me, I know that I stop not only breathing, but all conscious thought. The constant anxiousness in my mind that I work so hard to calm dissipates and my blood turns to warm honey.  It’s almost like a release of its own, and I immediately throw myself into him, and thankfully he’s right there to catch me.

        Garrick drops his arms to the back of my knees and lifts me with ease, all while pushing me closer into the door. His kiss is an anchor for me as he lines our bodies up perfectly, pressing into my wet core, exactly where I need him. I don’t have a lot of experience in this area, but I am pretty sure no one kisses quiet like Garrick. I’m drunk on the incredible mix of softness and strength he uses to completely melt me. I am liquid in his arms. His tongue presses tentatively against my lips and I open my mouth for him. The second that I do , I am suddenly overwhelmed by him in the best way. There is no corner of my mouth that he is not softly exploring and I can’t help but moan as he sucks my tongue lightly.

        We both hear the footsteps at the same time, and realize we have been playing a dangerous game. At any time someone could have walked down this hall and received a show of their life. Garrick places me on the ground quickly and turns around, his big back shielding me from the other riders gaze, as though he knew I would need a moment to get myself together and breathe normally again. A pretty blonde haired rider walks hand in hand with Ridoc towards his room and Garrick clears his throat. “Curfew, first years. Don’t break it.”
They both nod to him and pick up the pace to the end of the hall.

        As soon as they enter Ridoc’s room Garrick turns to face me again.
“Are you okay?” He asks me with concern in his eyes.
I chuckle, “Yes, I’m fine. I’m beginning to slowly feel my legs again.”
Recognition comes across his face and he gives me one of those rare true smiles of his, “I should go, or you're not going to be regaining feeling in your legs anytime soon.”
I nod, I know that he needs to leave but there is no part of me that wants him to. The idea of going back into my empty room to lay in that bed and agonizingly wait for morning to come sounds like a nightmare to me right now.
I summon all of my courage and hold Garricks gaze, “What would happen if I asked you to come into my room and stay with me tonight?”
Despite the risk, Garrick lets his head fall against mine so that our foreheads are pressed together as he whispers to me, “A lot of things would happen Maeve. All of them sound so good to me right now that it’s taking all of my will power to turn and walk away, but I’m going to. You have to figure out if you still want to be with your boyfriend. Because when I lay you down in that bed for the first time, it’s not going to be as someone else’s girlfriend.” There is almost a tinge of anger to Garrick’s voice as he continues. “ Your body will belong to me, not because I own it, but because I can make it come alive.”

      And just like that, I am right back to breathless and aching, if I ever even fully recovered.  “I need to see Soren. I need to talk to him and see where he’s at.”
Garrick nods, “I’ll talk to Xaden and we’ll get you in. You can have your conversation, no matter which way it goes. If you decide it’s him, I’ll still get you back here safely and I will still be your section leader. I won’t let it change anything but what we do together. You’ll still be able to trust me.”
I nod, “I know that. You wouldn’t hurt me.” I don’t know how I know it, I just do.
“Never,” Garrick growls and lightly pecks my lips before pushing off the door and walking away.