Maidens & Killers

Belonging

      Weeks pass in a mix of riding Craobh, perfecting my signet and spending as much time as possible with Garrick. War Games creeps up before I am fully ready, but ready or not I find myself lined up with the rest of my squad being given directions on stealing a Navarian artifact. I keep close to Violet and Rhiannon, even though Imogen and I are fine now, she will never be my first choice for a companion.
Everyone begins speaking at once when we are released, arguing about what to steal. Ridoc suggests a professor's underwear and I can’t help but laugh at the image.

     Violet suggests something from her mother's office and everyone unanimously agrees.
“I don’t know how much help I am going to be,” I tell Violet, “My signet works best outdoors. I have never tried to do anything indoors.”
Violet just nods, “You can be a lookout. If we need to make a quick getaway maybe we can jump out the window and you can make a hole or something. For now, just let Liam and Sawyer know if someone is coming.”
I wish that I was more helpful in this situation, but so long as we are inside the castle, I don’t know what I am capable of. I’ve been training with Professor Carr, but only outside in the courtyard and still don’t feel comfortable not hurting someone nearby.

    Thankfully I’m not needed much for the chaos that ensues as we steal a map of battles from General Sorrengail’s office, and we actually win this particular game. That evening, while everyone celebrates I snag a glass of spiked lemonade and head out to the courtyard to be alone.

“YOU’RE MOPING.” I hear Craobh tell me.
I’m not moping. I feel useless. I respond silently.
“NONSENSE. I WOULD NOT BOND A USELESS RIDER.” Craobh says with a snort.
Sorry to disappoint. I sniff, feeling overwhelmed with frustration.
“UGH. LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU ACTUALLY WANT MY HELP.” Craobh says and I feel his shields slam into place.

    I’ve always been good at wallowing in self pity. Poor little rich girl with so many opportunities given to her. I’m so deep in thought that I don’t hear the person that sidles up next to me in the courtyard until they are seated within arms reach. I turn, expecting to see Garrick’s big frame, and am surprised to see Xaden’s dark eyes meet mine.
“OH! Were you looking for me?” I ask confused.
“Not really. But I found you nonetheless.” Xaden replies shortly and lights up one of the sweet smelling handrolls I sometimes see him smoke.  “Why aren’t you inside celebrating with the rest of the wing?”
I shrug my shoulders, “ Not in the celebrating mood.”
“I’m not one to judge you for that.” Xaden replies.
If anyone understands wanting to be alone in a crowd, I have a feeling it’s Xaden.

     “Garrick’s been in a better mood lately, less quick to throw a dagger. I suppose I have you to thank for that.”  Xaden says after a few minutes of silence.
I smile despite my glum mood, “Ya, I suppose you do.”
Xaden smirks, “Ah well, I’m glad you guys worked your shit out, though I do think it’s a liability for him.”
“I don’t want to be a liability. I want to make his life easier.” I defend. 
“What we want to be and what we actually are can sometimes be two different things.” Xaden says looking up at the sunset that is creeping over the treeline.
I don’t know how to respond to that. Am I really putting Garrick in danger by being something that he cares about, that can be used against him? Am I holding him back?

    “Thanks for all the positivity.” I say shortly to Xaden with a roll of my eyes.
I hear the distinct crunching of leaves behind me, and turn to see Garrick approaching Xaden and I. He looks incredible, like usual. He’s wearing black pants that are tight on his thighs and ass, a soft long sleeved black shirt with a black flight jacket over it. His patches are perfectly lined on the chest of the jacket and his twin swords are secured to his back, their handles peaking above his shoulders.
My heart jumps into my throat, just like it does everytime that I see Garrick.

    “You two catching up?” His voice holds a tinge of nerves in it.
Xaden nods, “Becoming great friends, your girl and I.” Xaden puts his cigarette out and gets up from the ground in one swift motion.
“Glad to hear it.” Garrick responds and drops a protective arm around me where I am sitting on the dirt.
Xaden notes the protective stance Garrick is taking with me, “Look, I’ve come to terms with the fact that there’s no stopping this crazy train.” He waves his hand in mine and Garrick’s direction.
“Good.” Garrick just huffs. “You need anything else from me tonight?”
Xaden looks up at the sky now, almost examining it, “No. Nothing imminent tonight.”
I look between Garrick and Xaden and can tell that they are having a full conversation without words. I’d pay a pretty bag of gold to know what was being said.
Xaden finally turns to leave, but before he does he turns back to us, “Hey, Maeve. One last thing.”
I look up at the dark wing leader and he tosses me a small trinket wrapped in paper. I catch it and look confused at Garrick, who is sporting a shocked look on his face.
“Um, thanks Riorson.” I say and unwrap the paper.

      Nestled in the paper is a simple gold braided chain. I don’t see the charm at first, but when I lift it out of the paper, I see the small solitary pearl that is dangling from the chain. I gasp when I see it and turn to thank Xaden but he’s already walked off. When I look up to Garrick, he still looks surprised and speechless.
“It’s beautiful.” I say simply.
“It’s my mothers.” Garrick finally answers and reaches for it.
I think for a split second he is going to put it into his pocket but he simply unlatches it and motions for me to turn around. I give Garrick my back and he fastens the long chain around me. Once it settles, the cold gold lays against the front of my flight jacket, the small pearl ending just between my chest. I pick it up and hold the pearl between my fingers and examine it. It’s the most simple yet beautiful piece of jewelry I’ve ever worn.
“I can’t believe he has that, that he kept that.” Garrick mumbles.
“How do you think he got it?” I ask softly.
“My father, I’m sure. He somehow got it to him, knowing I would want to have it one day.” Garrick says with a sigh. 
I lean against Garrick’s shoulder, “Is it okay that I wear it?”
Garrick smiles at this, “Ya. It’s where it belongs now.” Before I know it I’m flat on my back on the cool ground with Garrick’s weight on top of me, which is definitely where I belong.