a beautiful soul

30-Justin back

Scared

I have always been scared! Since I have memories they always have one thing in common, fear. It follows me around and it comes in different shapes, sizes, subjects, but it's always the same old feeling. I tried to hide it by become mean and cruel, but even then it never left me.

I created such a mask to cover the fear, that I even let myself be fooled with it. I belived in my own lie.

The mirror in front of Mia shows nothing but a human being, but in her own eyes, those hazel eyes see a fake, plastic and insecure teenage girl. The mirror over the years became her worst enemy, because even though it didn't laugh at her when she cryed, it remimed her of how hypocritical she was.

I'm not proud of the choices I have made, and I don't think they were clever at all, but what kind of choice did I have?  I'm not fragile like a flower, but I am fragile like a bomb, so instead of being afraid I became something to fear.

"Mia" Clay knock on the door "Mia please open it" he said out of breath.

"God Clay what is it?" Her voice get's low as she talks observing the concern look on his face.

"I need your help" he said.

"Duh, obviously because than why would you be here?" she pointed "I have trial and school, I need to leave Clay" she said walking outside her bedroom.

"No, you can't go to school now" Clay spoke quickly stoping her from moving.

"What you mean? Clay what is going on ?" she asked concerned.

"Justin, he is in my room" She looked shocked at first, but quickly walked towrads Clay bedroom.

"But Mia wait, he isn't looking too good. It's probably gonna remind you of-" It didn't matter if he was able to end his sentence or not, Mia was already inside Clay's bedroom.

"Just" she wishpered to herself walking inside Clay's bedroom. Justin was sat in the desk chair with a blanket over his shoulders, eating something from a plate.

"Mia" he chocked in his food, not expecting to see her, just now.

"You piece of shit" she started walking towards him" What are you on?" she asked, her voice angry and desperate, seeing him like these gave dark falshbacks to the blond girl.

"What are you talking about?" he asked pretending he didn't understand her, mostly because he was embarassed.

"Don't fuck with me Justin Foley" she said. Mia turned to her brother in hopes he would know.

"Heroine"Clay mouthed

"Okay, okay" she reapeted over and over again to herself, she sat on Clay's bed trying to find her breathing rythem "Call Sheri, tell her I need my bag. She will know what to grab us" Mia spoke to her brother.

"Why Sheri?" Clay asked, opening his calling app. Of all the people she knew, why would Sheri know what to bring them.

"Because she has helped me before she can now help us help Justin" she admited.

"What about me?" Justin asked, his mouth filled with food.

"So I was cleaning your clothes and I found your shit and I fluzed it down the toilet, and now Mia is going to detox you" Clay admited. Justin's eyes fell on Mia, she looked so disspaointed and sad and even angry at him, he couldn't stand that. 

"Fuck this! I'm out of here" Justin shouted, getting up from the chair he started to look for his things.

"You can't and you won't leave Justin. Accept help" Mia spoke. When he ignored every word that left Mia's mouth Clay interviwned.