Another Chance for Lives

Puzzle of Possible Outcomes

 KARNA

Its almost morning but I still am here in this unfinish chamber since evening. Draupadi came for her walk as usual and started asking me to come to Khandavprasth. I asked her why she needs me there and she says it will be good for everyone. Only with that we started arguing. She informs me that I have to come there with Duryodhaan anyway once they pick a spot to build a palace. I don't like her leaving but I still say that I am happy she's leaving, why should I come there where I have to see them everyday. She got angry and left. I couldn't go after her. But in the mist of argument I didn't ask her the question I wanted to the most. 'Does the Maharani of Khandavprasth wants me to come or does Draupadi wants me to come?'

DRAUPADI

We start our journey to Khandavprasth with hopes and determination. Pitamah Beeshma, Krishna, Guru Dronachariya, Kul Guru Kripachariya and Vyed Viyas accompanies us. Jyest pitashri and Jyest mata  requested Matashree to  her to stay back. Matashree said she will come back to Hastinapur soon . After all there is nothing in Khandavprasth waiting for us. Only snakes maybe. Moreover I have noticed that Mata Kunti loves Hastinapur, her late husband's kingdom. 

A great deal of Hastinapur citizen followed us, many came out to bid us farewell. I look back for a moment hoping I can see my reason to miss Hastinapur, but he's nowhere to be seen. 

It was difficult when we reached Khandavprasth. We performed a lot of rituals and smalls hut were made for us to stay. I stay inside most times making sure every little details is checked. It's not just the brothers building their palace, it's mine too. I was planting flowers with Malini when Nakul interrupts. "Panchali, we need to tell you something." 

When I entered the bigger hut, where we usually gather, everyone was there. My Husbands, Krishna, Vyasa, Pitamah. "is everything fine" I ask, looking at their worried face. 
"Panchali, there is a problem. Settling here won't be easy. Right now we got news that Takshak is planning to attack us. And there are many more hurdle we need to overcome to make this place ours." Yudhistir informs me. 

"Takshak?" I ask.
Arjun replies. "Yes Panchali. And he is not to be underestimate. We have distributed some tasks. Each of us will take care of each side and one will protect the people. We have asked everyone to leave, as you said this is our 'Karma Bhoomi'. We want to do everything ourselves without help. So its better you and Matashree head back to Hastinapur with Pitamah Bishma, Guru Dron and Kul Guru."

"I can't leave. I have to stay with you guys here. Matashree should go with them. Who will look after food? And sleep? And you five? I can't leave. I can't enjoy the luxury of palace when my husbands are struggling here." As wild as my heart is, I know I should follow my patni Dhaarma. I tell myself everyday I should follow hell and heaven with them. They also sacrifice a lot for me. They've been understanding of me this whole time. They listen to my every word. 

"No Putri, you should come with me. If we are here they will not be able to concentrate, and if you stay back alone, I can't go and Tatshree Bhisma will be restless there in Hastinapur for our safety." Mata Kunti says. 

Pitamah tells, "I don't worry a bit about them putri. I know they can win against anyone. But you should come with us."

But I worry. I look at Krishna. "Are you staying with them Govind?"

Krishna replies. "But they didn't ask me to stay back. They say they won't take any help."
I put my lips together in case my word hurts my husbands. 

"Say what you want Sakhi. You are just concern for your husbands. You often keep your worries to yourself. Some time just one word can change a whole life. " Govind always knows what I feel inside, sometimes I am embarrassed in front of him.

I look at my husbands. "You guys should certainly ask Govind to stay back. He is our guide. With him we will only walk the path of righteous."

"I can only guide Sakhi. I don't force anyone. Those who have the strength to follow, follows." Krishna flashes his pleasant smile.

"It's right Madhav. Please stay and guide us." Arjun folds his hands.

Govind decided to stay back and as we get prepare for the travel Vyasa says, "To become an emperor you need to start your marriage life. You need an empress."

"Panchali will always be the empress of our kingdom Rishivar." Yudhistir says. 

"Hmmm. I will come when its time for Bhumi pooja. Putri, come see me off. You have a lot of worries, don't you." Vyasa says to me. 
I follow him silently, my palm sweets. I always felt like Vyasa and Govind has a secret code.

"Learn to express your worries. Your husband surely will understand you." Vyasa says walking slowly.

"I trust them with my life Rishivar. But I still don't understand how I will lead this life. How will I do justice to all? And I fear they will neglect me too, after all, no one looks after something that has more than one owner." I confess my fear.

He turns to me. "Never trust anyone with your life unless he is Narayan. And remember you should pull the string of your own life. And for your worries, you can tell them you will have the children of only one of them, the one who adores you the most. Put them through some task. The journey of child birth is a hard one. I am sure your children will  be worthy of all hardship but remember root keeps the tree tied in a burning forest."

"Still how can I do that injustice to them? They all have a right to be a father." I shake my head.

"I can only guide Putri. For every choice you make, there are hundreds of possible outcome. I just don't want the one gods are trying to prevent to come true." Vyasa left saying that. 
Not being able to understand, I look for my friend.

"Govind what do I do? Will I be able to do this? What if it results to something bad?" I ask Krishna. 
"Sakhi, we can only do our karma, the result is not in our hand. However we should choose our steps carefully, we still have time to change things. Our present action should not lead us to a dreadful future." Krishna answer me but I am more confuse.

I beg him, "Can you please tell clearly. What is this future everyone keeps talking about?" I ask.

"Every action should be taken careful. Ever word, should be said carefully." Krishna becomes emotional. "Sakhi, I see a lot of possible outcome, and in some, my heart breaks with yours. I see people who blindly follow words, I see people tugging their own grave, I see people living an eternity with regrets. I see people wishing they had more courage. And to prevent this devastating outcome, God shows us the way. Its up to people if they follow it or not." 

I look at him in confusion. What is this outcome that is making even God worried.
"What outcome? Who will live in regret? Who will wish they had more courage?" I demand.

He makes a face that says he already said too much and answer. "I don't know much. I just heard it from someone that there's a high possibility of happening to someone Surya Dev knows." 

"Someone Surya Dev knows?" 
Before I could ask more, Arjun calls me.

Arjun helps me get ready to go to Hastinapur. 
"Stay safe Panchali. Nothing should happen to you in the presence of Pitamah. Don't go out of the palace." He says.

"Don't be worried Arya. I am just going to Hastinapur." I laugh.
"No matter where it is, I will always be worried for you. After all we were made for each other." He holds my hand and confesses. "Sometimes I want to yank off Jyest's hands off your shoulder." 

A worry I kept aside for few moments creeps in again. 'How will I do justice to them?' Since everyone keep saying me and Arjun are made for each other, I do feel like I have a closer connection with him.
But the worry of loving one of them more doesn't comes up. The image in my heart will always stay hidden.