𝗠𝗬 𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗦𝗢𝗡 | 𝗝𝗨𝗗𝗘 𝗕𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗛𝗔𝗠

26.

Jude

"Hey Maria." I smile opening my arms out to give her a hug.

"Hi Jude." She hugs me back, smiling softly.

"Please." She gestures towards the chair for me to sit down as I'm just standing awkwardly looking at her. A bit nervous, haven't had an in person therapy session with Maria in a long time.

I sit down, clasping my hands together.

"So...how have you been?" She asks looking at me.

The how have you been question is always a funny one. I spend most of my time deciding wether I should answer it honestly, tell people when I'm feeling like shit, that I'm feeling like shit. Or if I should lie, give a short and sweet answer that appeases the other party but does nothing for me.

In this case, it's best to be honest.

"I've been...." I start tapping my fingers on the arm of the chair, rhythmically.

"Somedays good, somedays bad." A very honest answer from me. Somedays life's great, I feel happy and proud of myself for maturing, for being open with my feelings. I feel..mentally strong.

And then other days the darkness creeps into my mind and it gets all foggy. All of a sudden I'm not proud of myself, I'm thinking negative things, I'm wanting to shut down and not share how I'm truly feeling.

"What's been good lately?" Maria questions. I've learnt that this is her tactic to get me to open up more. It's so I evaluate my life and manage to look at it in a positive light.

I let out a deep exhale, looking around the room a little. Nice room. Cosy. Probably to make her clients feel at ease. The rooms lamp lit. Warm orangey colour. Candles around burning, a few plants.

"Uhm....well....my last game before Christmas break went really well. We won."

"That's great Jude!" Maria smiles. Genuine happiness for me.

"Yeah." I sniff a laugh.

"Uh...Isabella and I are now really good friends. We both agreed dating wasn't for the best now we've moved on from it."

"She's met someone recently. Which is good."

"Lovely to hear that the pair of you are good friends now. Very healthy of you two."

"And you said she's met someone recently. How does that make you feel? Does that bother you?"

"Nah. It's extremely platonic between Isabella and I." I smile. It really is. And I'm glad. I like having her around.

Maria nods with a smile. Writes down a few notes as she does whenever we had face to face sessions. I assume she did the same when we had phone call sessions too.

"What else is good?"

Harmony being back in my life is what's good. In fact that's the top thing for me.

"Harmony and I are also friends. Not sure if it's good friends. I assume so seeing her and I went Christmas shopping the other day." I laugh to myself, reminiscing on her dragging me towards the Christmas market stalls.