𝕸𝖞 𝖒𝖔𝖔𝖓 | ᴏꜱᴄᴀʀ ᴅɪᴀᴢ

19. butterflies

Once I was done with my makeup, I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I tried to quickly prepare myself, and mentally hype myself up. "Are you done?" I heard Cesar groan from behind me. I got up and took one last look in the mirror, before grabbing Cesar's hand and dragging him out of the room. 

Once we entered the kitchen, there were more people there than I had expected. We walked to the fridge to get a couple of beers, while two people were making out against the kitchen counter. "I don't know how I feel about random people making out in my kitchen." I whispered, just so Cesar could hear me. I handed him his beers and earned a chuckle from him. We walked to the backyard which was full of people, separated into their own groups. I noticed Antonio and some of the guys, including Oscar, chilling on and around the couches. Cesar started walking towards them, me following behind. Oscar was sitting in the corner of the couch with the other corner free. I had my eyes on the free spot on the other couch, but Cesar decided to sit down there, causing me to have no other choice than to sit next to Oscar. I sat down with my knees against my chest, so I wouldn't take up too much space. I sent him a small smile, while cracking my beer open. He looked at me with an intimidating gaze and handed me his pack of cigarettes. I hesitated for a second, not knowing how my brother would feel about me smoking, but I quickly remembered I wasn't a kid anymore. I took a cigarette and thanked him under my breath, before placing the cigarette on my lips. He lit the cigarette, but this time he kept his eyes on the cigarette, instead of my eyes like last time. He leaned back down, while I exhaled the smoke. "Since when have you smoked?" I heard my brother ask, from the other couch. "Maybe you don't know everything about me." I laughed, jokingly rolling my eyes at him, causing him to put his hands in the air in a defensive manner, making everyone laugh.

The night went on, we listened to music, and even more people came by. Beer after beer, I started to feel more worry-free, and just enjoyed the night. Even though I was sitting next to Oscar, we didn't really talk much, but he also was chugging beers like never before. I'd never really seen him drunk, tipsy even. I watched my brother with a beer in his hand, and his arm up in the air, singing along to the music with some of the guys beside him, doing the same thing, including Cesar. The sight made me laugh, throwing my head back. I looked at Oscar, who also had a smile on his face, looking at his friends making fools of themselves. I kept my eyes on him, still smiling from ear to ear. He turned his head towards me to look at me with drunken eyes, but a soft smile. "Shouldn't you be singing up there too?" He asked, nodding his head towards the others. "I think I'll need a couple more of these to do that." I smiled, holding up my beer. "You gotta be careful, I don't wanna be carrying you inside when you're passed out." Oscar shook his head and chuckled. I really wanted to get closer to him, but I didn't quite know how to do it, subtly. I was still sitting on the corner of the couch, with my knees against my chest, watching him on the other end. "Fuck you." I laughed, kicking him jokingly, making him laugh. I straightened my legs and left them beside him, feeling ridiculous about my attempt to get closer to him. Suddenly, he grabbed my legs and pulled them on his lap, causing my stomach to fill with butterflies. He was very nonchalant with it, while I felt like I was floating. He rested his arm on the edge of the couch, while the other was placed on my bare ankle, his thumb softly rubbing it. I was already dizzy from the alcohol, but that made me feel ecstatic. I was nervous about how this would look to the others, but when I turned my head to look at them, they were still very much into their own karaoke show. I turned my head back to look at Oscar, who was already looking at me. I couldn't help but smile, earning a smirk back, which made me feel like I could do things that I would later regret. I wasn't quite sure what the situation meant, since Oscar was drunk, but I wanted to enjoy the moment, even if it didn't mean anything to him.

After a while, the guys started to come back to the couch, causing me to get a bit nervous about the placement of my legs. "I'll be right back." I said, pulling my legs away and standing up. I walked away, and went inside. I went to the bathroom, and felt the room spin, some of it caused by the drinking, and some by my heart doing cartwheels. I walked out of the bathroom and went into my room, closing the door, and freaking out for a second. I looked at myself in the mirror, not believing what had just happened. I know it wasn't a big deal, but for me, it was. I took a deep breath in, and collected myself, before walking out.

When I opened the door, I saw Oscar leaning on the wall, making my heart jump in my throat.