Avenged

20] Phobia of Cigarettes (2)

Taehyung's pov:

The moment he said that, I knew that I had to handle it with care. Knowing that it might be dangerous , I still chose to ask him because my paranoid self was too curios to think stupid. I didn't even want to think what my head was try to make me.

Phobia of cigarettes?

The thought of them only made me go at such depths of torture that I had not ever seen in real life. And I swear that if this time I heard something bad , I won't be able to stop myself from ruining shits.

" Go on kook. I am here. I will be always there for you so speak. Don't keep it to yourself and tell me whatever you want , whatever you need and whatever you can. And remember that I am always with you." I said and again this unfamiliar feeling fluttered in my chest doing something to me. 

These days I was doing things too strange that I myself couldn't believe them sometimes. I didn't know what was happening to me but I just wanted to be close to him and make him smile. 

Jungkook had gone through a lot and I could feel it....I had experienced for how he would be feeling and that's why I wanted him to be happy.

I did a mistake and am paying for it since forever but now , I won't let it happen again. Not when I have this second chance to my fullest , to bring Jungkook out of this mess. Now everything was in my control and I had the chance to make a life happy. 

I won't let Jungkook go through the pain.....I won't let the guilt of being useless take over me again. No. Not again.

I scooted closer to Jungkook and wrapped my arm around his waist making him look up at me with frozen eyes and figure. His body was cold and pale. His eyes were stuck with mine while he kept on staring at me. They were deep like the never ending water surface. Silent like the ocean and beautiful like the waves.

Slowly my eyes trailed down those doe dark orbs to his lips. They were rose red and looked soft like petals.  Glistening and looked so juicy even the thought of that smoke blowing out of them made me go insane. That cigarette didn't deserve his lips. I di-

" Jesus!" I hissed not realizing that I had hissed out loud. 

" I am..... sorry. Here." I brought out the lighter after clearing my throat. Jungkook looked away with pink cheeks, pushing the cigarette between his lips and I lightened it up before he sucked a puff and blew it out vigorously.

" Wow." I stated staring at him smoke like a pro.

" What?" He questioned leaning in my hold and placed his head on my chest as his back came in contact with my chest , nuzzling himself into me. He was really cold. " You smoke so sexily. Like man!" I laughed at his frown and added " Keep your legs on the couch. " 

"......why?" He questioned looking up at me after taking a puff.

" Just do as I say , kook-ahh." I  said making him nod.

He removed his shoes with his toes and then placed them long , on the couch and after that I took the light blanket that was kept at the corner and opening it , I covered us in it.

I supported my torso by the railing and pulled his back into my chest as he smoked laying long on the couch.

" Is it comfortable?" I asked and he looked up at me.

God~~

My chest thumped at the sight so beautiful and almost extinct to see. Kook was smiling beautifully like a bunny. This was the first time I had seen this expression on his face and it looked so beautiful that I felt my chest breaking into millions of happy feelings. The palpation in my chest hyped as his eyes went zero on my lips but he was fast enough to look away and acted as if he didn't think something terrible like I did just a few moments ago.

" More than ever." He spoke and I couldn't help but grin at this point.

" Very well. Then tell me....now" I said getting back to the main point where we had left.

" Hmm..." He hummed shifting in his place and placed his cold hand over mine - under the blanket - only to wrap both of my hands firmly around his waist and in the response my legs-on their own-secured his lower body around them.

We weren't that close to each other. We weren't lovers. We weren't drunk either....yet this was happening right now. His head was over my chest and I knew that he could feel my heartbeat because I myself could hear them through my forehead and ears.

We were laying so close that we were actually cuddling. Damn! This feeling was so intense that I couldn't help but try to remember the moment when what happened that we ended like this. 

I was cuddling with Jungkook under my hold . His tiny torso now wrapped with both my hands while my legs were wrapped around his legs. What was I doing was getting out of my control and I my entire focus was on the thing that Jungkook was with me , happy. 

I finally got that bunny smile to see on his face and now I wanted him to have that smile as long as he lived with me. As long as I was going to be with him.

" Firstly....its nothing related to me. And secondly....He didn't burn me with cigarettes." He chuckled when he saw me visibly relax at those words.

" What? Did you think that he burnt me with cigarettes. He was a monster but not stupid to waste cigarettes over me. " His voice was cool and he talked recklessly as if it was all so simple and fun.

" He used hot rods but never once used a cigarettes so yeah....Its was not because of him." He puffed out another cloud of smoke as it disappeared into the air mixing its smell into the atmosphere.

" You see....my mom used to smoke a lot...She used to....smoke and then push the stick over her skin and.....smile at me. She used to do that in front of me while all I did was cry because my hands were tied with r-ropes as I sat on the floor useless and w-worthless." His words started to come out weakly and his figure started to get colder.

I hugged him tighter than before and placed my cheek over his fluffy , thick and soft hair as he spoke under my hold.