Losing Control✓ (New Adult Romance)

Chapter One

It's the first week of summer, thank God. The air reeks of lilacs and lake water, making the beach smell funky, like too many air fresheners sprayed in one room. I lounge on one of the old lawn chairs with a Gillian Flynn novel gripped in my hand. Wes lingers near me, but I use my book as a defense against conversation. If the rumors are true, Wes wants to get back together, and unfortunately, my family is determined to make that happen.

"Thanks again for inviting me," says Wes, leaning toward my parents.

They sit at the fire with my older sister across from them. Their faces flicker in the warmth of the flames, their bodies otherwise shadowed. The sun falls behind the mountains and the moon crawls above the horizon. It's just after dusk and the crickets and frogs are chirping loudly.

"You are so welcome," says my mother. "It wouldn't be the same here without you."

For once, my mother has a point. Our beach house would not be the same without Wes—it would be far more comfortable and far less stressful. I'd be able to swim and read and tan in peace without Wes's expectant gaze tracing my every move. He's been trying to talk with me all weekend, but somehow, I've evaded any real conversation.

"Why don't you two join us?" asks my dad. He drapes an arm around Mom and gives an easy smile. It seems to say don't we make a great couple? Don't you want to be a great couple, just like us?

"I'm reading," I say, holding up the book.

"Honey, you'll hurt your eyes trying to read in the dark," says Mom with a laugh. "Come sit with us. I feel like I've barely seen you all weekend."

That's because I've been hiding.

I hesitantly climb from my lawn chair and take a seat on one of the logs before the fire. Of course, Wes is quick to follow. He sits directly beside me, close enough that our arms touch and I can feel the slight sweat on his skin. I scoot a few inches down the bench, barely able to resist rolling my eyes.

For the next hour, I withstand horrible tortures, including s'more making, story telling, and hint dropping. Mom relives memories of my relationship with Wes, the one and only relationship I've ever had. Dad mentions that we would make a very handsome couple. Even Paige joins in on the fun, lamenting the fact she doesn't have a boy as charming and as kind as Wes after her.

"It's nice that you two will be going to the same college," says Mom. She turns her attention to Wes. "You be sure to take care of our Addie."

"Of course," says Wes, his voice husky and too-sincere.

I can't help myself—I start to laugh. Wes stiffens beside me, and Mom stares at me with gaping eyes.

"What's so funny?" she asks, a bit too sweetly.

A million things immediately come to mind, but I'm too shy to voice any of them. I'd probably piss off Wes and Mom if I made fun of their conversation.

"I'm just tired," I say finally. "I think I'm going to bed."

"It's only ten thirty," says Paige, arching a nearly-invisible blonde eyebrow.

I shrug my shoulders.

"At least let Wes walk you," says Mom—of course.

"No, I'll be fine," I say, my voice a bit harsher than I intend. I give Wes a quick smile. "You stay, enjoy the fire. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

Wes nods, but he doesn't say anything, a sure sign that he sees through my facade. It doesn't matter—as soon as I get to the University of Montana, I plan to escape my family and Wes and everything that happened in the past. For once, I won't be broken, damaged Addie—I'll just be Addie.