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It was unreal. You were actually going through the Scorch with these people. You were just blindly trusting them.
Well, not them.
Aris. You had blindly trusted Aris.
You had been unaffected by Winston's death. After all, everybody dies in one way or another. His wasn't even the most brutal you had witnessed. He was able to do it himself and say goodbye to his loved ones beforehand. While he was also young, he once again wasn't the youngest death you had seen.
They thought the fact that you acted the exact same after, walking with your head high, being on the lookout, already forgetting about his existence, was cruel. The way you could just keep the fire going, your eyes showing no kind of sadness, sent chills up their spines. While they were aware you didn't know him, they weren't aware just how much you had seen. Even if they did, it wasn't fathomable that you could go numb to it. It didn't make sense. It disgusted them.
Aris didn't understand that logic. While knowing someone had caught the Flare and had to commit suicide brought this heaviness on his shoulders, he knew you had no reason to react as though it mattered. He had found you with literal blood on your clothes, shaken up, with your first instinct being to protect your life. It seemed like common sense that you would react differently.
You watched him sitting on a rock, his hands in his pockets as he sighed.
You had never comforted anyone before. You never had a reason to. You were always doing the exact opposite.
You had found out about Rachel. He had said something about her just last night. When you realized his voice cracked at her name, his eyes turned solemn, and she wasn't here, it was clear that something happened to her. Something that took her away forever.
He left before you could respond to his words, and you didn't want to push him. You let him be by himself to gather his thoughts.
No. You had never gave anyone any kind of comfort before.
For him, it was worth a try. You didn't want him to hurt. You never want anything bad to happen to him. He's truly all you have in this cruel world. He's the only one to show you genuine kindness without expecting anything back.
As he heard your footsteps he looked to see you standing there.
"Hey,"He quietly greets, wearing a strained smile.
"Hi,"You greet back, you eyes flickering to the ground for a second as you debate backing out.
Then, you remember who you're talking to and meet his gaze again.
"I'm sorry you lost Rachel,"You apologize, being genuine despite you not quite getting it.
He was taken aback for a second. While he knew you weren't heartless, he also knew that people dying didn't affect you. Being sorry for someone you didn't even know because he had been close to her was a strange.
It was a kind thought though. It truly was something good in a world full of bad.
"Thanks,"He nods.
"Would you like to tell me about her?"You offer, shuffling in your spot.
You would never be able to understand this kind of pain. The closest you would get to it is when he would get taken at the Safe Haven. Only then would you somewhat learn what it means to lose a friend (with romantic feelings that neither of you quite understood yet).
"Yeah. I would,"He nods, his smile a little bit less forced this time. Scooting over, he pats the cramped space beside him. Joining, you accept his hand as you climb next to him.
You didn't really understand his grief. You didn't really understand his pain.
You care about him though, and that's enough to care about her death.
