You Just Love To Hate Me || Ricky 'Horror' Olson (EDITING)

Chapter 27: I Don't Love You Like I Did Yesterday

Song for this chapter: I Don't Love You - My Chemical Romance

Quick thing. I've changed my update schedule so this will now be updated on Mondays.

Vamp's POV

Today's the day. The day where I know I'll run into Ricky or someone from Motionless In White. They'll pressure me into making up with him and I really want to, but it won't be the same. I realise I overreacted, but you would too if the person you love has seen you get hurt over and over again, has promised to always be honest and then fucking lies to you. It hurts. A lot. I want to be with him again, but then I'll seem weak and he'll think he can do this to me again because I'll just take him back. I've been weak in the past and look where it's got me.

I haven't gotten out of my bunk since I got in after the show last night and the guys have been pestering me to go and get some lunch with them since 'I haven't eaten properly in weeks'. I personally think they're overreacting, but I'm going to have to go with them before burst my eardrums.

"Give me two minutes then for fuck sake," I grumbled and got out of my bunk.

All the guys backed away from my bunk and Carson gave me a small, encouraging smile from her place on the couch. She's the one person who hasn't spoken to me today knowing what I'd be going through, the guys don't really get it.

I pulled on a pair of leggings and a baggy, plain, black hoodie. I pulled on my black converse and pulled my hair up into a messy ponytail without brushing it first because I couldn't be bothered. I pulled the hood up over my head and walked out of the bus in silence, everyone else slightly in front of me.

The guys were messing about, but I seemed to cast a gloomy shadow over them. Carson was slightly to the side and was quietly chatting to Flame about something - most likely me since that's all they talk about. I hear them talk about me constantly how 'they're worried' how 'they miss me' and all of that bullshit which makes no sense because I'm fine and I'm right here.

I pulled a cigarette out of my hoodie pocket and brought it to my lips - it's a disgusting habit I've picked up in the past few weeks and I'm not at all proud of it, but it calms me down - and pulled out my Slipknot lighter and lit it. I inhaled the sweet relief and exhaled moments later, watching a white vapour cloud form before me. It disappeared as soon as it came - just like he did.

We reached the restaurant and I threw my cigarette to the ground, stomping on it violently. The guys all looked at me with sad eyes, and waited for me to catch up before going into the small diner they chose to eat at.

We got a large booth and I sat next to the wall, Carson on my other side and Galaxy sat across from me. I stared down at my chipped black nail polish when I felt a soft kick on my ankle.

I looked up and Galaxy mouthed, 'I'm proud of you,' at me. I rolled my eyes and looked back down at the grubby table.

The diner was quite quiet and seemed homely enough except for a rowdy group of guys in the back corner whom I just rolled my eyes at, they were here before we came, but I never looked at them because I was too focused on sitting down and ignoring everyone again.

Some woman came and took everyone's order and I just got a plain burger and a water. Galaxy tried to make me get something bigger, but a burger is big enough anyway.

Everyone was chatting and laughing, but it was all muffled and merged together so I couldn't make out what anyone was saying and they sounded like they were on the other end of a tunnel.

I stood up and climbed over people after announcing I was going outside 'for some air' when in reality I was going to smoke. Galaxy is really upset that I've developed the habit, all the guys are, but he's focused on that while the rest of the guys are just focused on getting me back together with Ricky.