Say you love me

Part 20

"Christine, how the fuck could you let this happen?!"
"How could I? Don't put that fucking shit on me, you bastard! I didn't make this baby by myself!" Chris threw down her hands in both frustration and exasperation, because was he really pulling this shit? Unbelievable. "I don't remember you running to the store for protection!" Chris sneered.
"You couldn't have paid more attention?"

John paced around the room, then sat down at the table, putting his head in his hands. He groaned.
"How far along are you?" He asked in a hushed voice. "Seven, almost eight weeks." Chris replied. John didn't look up. He didn't speak for several moments before it dawned on Chris on what he was implying. The thought made her sick.

"Oh my god, you bastard. You selfish bastard!" Her voice cracked as the tears came. She sat down on the floor, her shoulders heaving as she cried. How could John even suggest it? He knew she'd always wanted children. He knew.

"We can't have a baby, Christine. We're not ready."
"You mean you're not ready!" Chris snapped. John was fucking ridiculous, now he was acting like he wasn't going to support his own child. Hell, if Chris's guess was correct, he wouldn't. But she didn't need him.

It was 1969. Women were getting jobs, more rights. Christine wouldn't be totally alone; she had her mother, and she had Mick's wife Jenny. Jenny and her had became friendly over the past year, being the only two women of the bands. They stayed up for hours, talking and laughing and doing each others hair and nails, even though Chris wasn't very fond of that sort of primping. But it was just nice to have another woman to talk to and share stories and magazines and nail polish with.

Certainly Jenny and Mick would be kind enough to let her shack up on their couch for a night or two, just until she got her plan together.

"I don't need you, John," Chris spit the words like daggers.
"I'll go far away and raise this baby by myself, and maybe someday I'll write you to tell you if you have a boy or a girl." She stood up, went to the corner where the suitcases were kept.

"Where the hell are you going?" John yelled as Chris picked up her suitcase and started to repack the items she'd just unpacked yet a few days ago.
"I'm leaving."
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Jenny was in her own hotel room with Mick, watching TV. The Dick Cavett Show was on and she was enjoying Janis Joplin's interview when there was a knock at the door. Who could it be now? The concert was cancelled due to rain and most of the guys went out to the bar, except Mick obviously. He preferred to have a quiet night in, watching TV and ordering room service. Now he was stuffing himself with mozzarella sticks, when it was Jenny who ordered them.
"Save some of those for me, you greedy asshole!" Jenny said as she went to the door. She opened the door, being greeted by a wailing, very wet Chris.

Chris's hair was matted to her forehead, her clothes stuck to her body. She was shivering, making her cries twice as heartbreaking.
"Oh honey! Come inside." Jenny pulled Chris inside, every step tracking water droplets. The dog immediately came over and kicked Chris's wet leg.
"He--acted-- like it was--my--fault!" Chris was crying too hard to speak properly.
"Honey what happened?" Jenny got up, got a towel, and dried Chris's hair and face.

"I'm-p-pregnant and I thought maybe, maybe John would be happy you know?" Christine hiccuped. She was freezing, and the dog kept licking her wet feet.

"But he wasn't! I should've expected it, I don't know why I didn't. I've told him so many times I want kids of my own, I've tried so many ways to get him to change his mind." Jenny rubbed her back as she waited for Chris to continue.

"I can't stay here, I can't keep touring with a husband who wants me to abort. I can't deal with it," she looked at Mick pleadingly, silently asking him to help her.

"Christine, go. You don't need to stay here. I'll try and talk to John if I don't tear his ass apart first. Go and sort things out."
Chris nodded, her eyes refilling with tears.

She slept on the floor of Mick and Jenny's hotel room that night, the dog curled up by her head. The dog was very affectionate, he kept waking Chris up to play and give her sloppy kisses. It wasn't the best nights sleep, but Chris was more at peace than she had been in a week.

In the morning, she left for her mother's.