Just because you know someone's leaving doesn't make it any easier to deal with. At least not for me. The Bluetts had thrown a going away to college party for Justin the night before, and it was so easy to get caught up in all the excitement and lights, and presents, and people. Take all that away and what are you left with? What am I left with? I had the sudden urge to break down into a tantrum and demand that Justin spend the rest of the summer in town, with me. Now I had self-diagnosed attachment issues.
Justin notices how quiet I am, but doesn't bother filling in the silence. It's just as well, because the tears start rushing down my cheek. I wipe my face before turning to face away from him. This is really embarrassing. "And I thought you weren't going to miss me," he says in a low voice, but I don't crack a smile. He has to leave pretty soon...as in five minutes or so soon, but he doesn't start walking to his packed up car. "I'll be fine, I'm just being a baby. And you're gonna be late," I add, and grab his hand so I can walk him to the car. Instead he pulls me to him and with his thumb wipes the corners of my eyes. Then he leans in and kisses me. The kiss tastes like salt and endings and all that sentimental jazz, and when he goes to pull away, I hold on. I've got to let him go sometime and choking back on a sob, that's what I tell myself to do. "Call me when you hit the interstate, and then when you're at the campus," I say from the outside looking in, as Justin buckles his seat belt and leans his arm the window door. "What, are you worried about me?" he teases, even though we've been over this before. Plus I don't want to be responsible for him getting into an accident.
"Yes, it's nice being on the other side for once," I say, but I'm not joking. I can still remember the looks of alarm on Justin's face earlier this summer, and now I can understand. Mostly. Everything in my soul is screaming at me about this simple send off, but because I can't put my finger on it, and I'm not going to tempt the Universe with my crazy off the wall theories and fears, I push it way down. Like holding down vomit but less graphic.
"Kay, well."
"Wellll..."
"Bye..."
I lean in so Justin can kiss me on my nose, refusing to utter a proper goodbye, and then he's off. I follow the car with my eyes until he's up the driveway, down the road, and finally out of sight. I don't bother saying goodbye to Olivia or Mr. Bluett, instead choosing to leave immediately to have time to myself. Someone is blowing up my phone, and I peak to see if Justin's picture pops up. Nope. I ignore it and drive to the movie theater. I've seen almost every single one of the films still out playing, but I pick one anyway, and buy a tub of over-priced popcorn in an attempt to take my mind off the present. The trailers are already playing when I walk into the theater room, and I find an empty row right in the middle. I'm mindlessly shove popcorn into my mouth, when I haven't even made a good dent and decide I want something to drink. But is it worth walking all the way out to the concessions and all the way back? I decide to lay off the popcorn and in the last few minutes of the movie leave then to get something to drink. That plan lasts all but a couple minutes, and then I'm back to stuffing popcorn. Screw it, I bought the damn tub and I might as well eat it, thirsty or not. The low, occasional talking of people enjoying a movie starts to bother me, but when my phone buzzes in my pocket, I answer right then and there, the caller making everything better.
"On the interstate," Justin says, and I grin in the darkness of the theater. "Wait...are you watching a movie?" he asks, and I try to keep my voice contrast from his. "No, I'm skydiving, just about to jump out of the plane." On the movie screen, there is a skydiving team, but of course I'm just comfortable in my chair. "Pshh, okay Love Song." My next sarcastic response dries up on my tongue. "You...shut up," I whisper, because the soundtrack has suddenly become soft again. "I'll talk to you later," I finally say, when we're just listening to each other breathe, which I don't object too, but my dad might when he sees the phone bill.
When it's just me and my thoughts, and everyone else in the house has gone to bed, I wait by the phone, ignoring how silly it is to wait for it to come to life. He's going to call, there's no reason to be on pins and needles. My stomach does flip flops, but I manage to keep it to a minimum by thinking about how ridiculous I'll feel when I hear his voice and he's just fine.
"Earth to Lyric, is she there?" Danté waved his greasy fingers in my face, and it took all my restraint not to clock him right then and there. "Get your French fry fingers out my face before I help you," I said sweetly instead, and took a bite out my burger. It was cold now, thanks to my mind being elsewhere, sometimes my gaze drifted to mom's picture, where the slip of paper used to be in the frame. She was on my mind tonight, but why worry over a person's who's already dead? "Eat any slower, and you might actually manage to go back in time," Danté commented, and I managed a swift kick to his leg. "Ow!" he yelped, and my dad looked up from his tablet, but I feigned innocence and concentrated on another bite of dinner. "I'm not in this," my dad put both hands up, one holding a napkin between his palm and thumb, before I sat on my legs to ensure my brother wouldn't try me again.
Amazingly my worry has tired me enough to lull me to sleep, but I jump up wide awake when my phone rings, alert and ready. "I'm here...well for twenty minutes. I check in tomorrow" he answers sleepily, and I do I silent fist pump in the air, before responding. "Yay, now get some sleep," I say, giddy to hear his voice. "Wait," I say before he hangs up.
"I love you." I'm cheesy. Breathing.
"I love you too." He's cheesy too.
Hey guys! Hopefully you've enjoyed my first story, and I'd appreciate it greatly if y'all have any feedback or (constructive) criticism :)
There's a sequel to this that would be called Blue September, that I have in mind, so PLEASE let me know if there's any interest in reading more about Lyric and her college escapades
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Hello August, Please Be Good To Me
Teen FictionI look out into the parking lot and squint to make sure I'm not going crazy. Walking up with a bouquet of flowers is Justin. He's wearing a muscle tee, and my eyes settle on the part of his tattoo that's not covered up by the plastic holding the flo...
