Almost Normal

Chapter 19

A/N-Hello everyone. I'm sorry for such a long wait on this chapter, but promise me, it will be well worth the wait. And also, thank you guys so much for 4.5k reads on this story!! I love you all so much, and it makes me so happy to see you all enjoying the story. So without further waiting, here is Chapter 19! Happy Reading-Zenovia

Armin's POV

Chapter 19

Pills and snow start to both decrease as time passes by. It's almost April now and I haven't seen Eren since that horrific surprise meeting a couple of weeks ago. I know that I've fallen back into the person I was before. "I-I'm depressed." I scribble down into my notebook. It didn't take me long to realize the signs after that night. However, my wrists have stayed clean throughout all of this torment, and I intend to keep it that way. But just like the seasons changing, things might start to get better starting tonight. It's Eren's last game of the season. Of course his team made it to state with the powerhouse duo of Levi and Eren. 

Mikasa texted me a few days ago to check up on me. She's made sure that I was getting enough sleep and food to eat. I smile at how motherly she can act sometimes, but I cherish every part of it. She then asked me if I would go to the game with her and the squad. I tried to tell her that I wasn't in the mood, but she wouldn't take no for an answer. "You need to start seeing Eren again, especially with basketball season ending." She told me one day. So with a little persuading, I finally agreed to go.

Pulling out my coat, I finally met up with Mikasa, and we both walked to the gymnasium. The silence was absolutely deffining. I knew that the raven haired girl wanted to talk to me about my mental state of mind, but I just kinda want to forget everything that has escalated within the soon to be four months. I started to think that maybe things would go back to the way they were before Levi came into the picture. That Eren and I could go back to the way things were in the fall. But with each step in the now melting snow, I know that all of my thoughts probably won't come true, but I can still hope. Mikasa started to pick up on my weird mood, and she did something that I wasn't expecting her to do. She gently took my hand in her own, and squeezed it comfortingly. I looked back at her and gave her a small smile. Over these hard months, Mikasa has really made sure that I'm still breathing by the end of the day. I couldn't thank her enough for all that she's done, and I think in this moment, she understands, and that's all I could ask from her.

We finally walked into the all too familiar gym, and it looked the exact same from the last time that I was here, except everything was decorated with motivational posters for the game tonight. I took a seat next to Mikasa, and soon everyone else showed up. There was laughter all around, and it made the atmosphere warmer. I didn't feel so upset anymore, and I soon started to converse with everyone. I smiled, laughed, and talked normally. It was nice not to worry and stress for once. Sasha turned over to me and smiled, "Hey, listen after the game, I think that all of us are going to go over to my grandparents and have a bonfire, just like we did in the fall. Do you wanna come?" Sasha's eyes glimmered in excitement, and I couldn't possibly say no to her when she was looking at me like that. "Yeah, I'll come. It should be fun." I replied. She grinned and then went back to talking with Connie.

I wish that I could stay like this forever, to not feel the overwhelming sadness anymore. But my optimistic mood fades away when I hear the sound of the buzzer going off. I see both sides of the team walk out onto the court, and start to warm up. I try not to look at Eren when he's throwing the ball to his teammates, but I fail time and time again. It's as if he doesn't even notice me anymore. He doesn't see the pain in my eyes when I see him smile at Levi. My body stays numb as I keep watching them warm up, until I feel another presence next to me. "Hey, don't try and focus on him. It'll only make it worse." I'm met with kind grey eyes that only could belong to Mikasa. I sigh and nod my head. I know that she's right. I should move on and not dwell on the fact that Eren and I will never have the relationship that I crave for us to have. But the more that I think about the obvious facts, the more my heart wants him.