Nothing // l.h

Chapter 30

I looked to see if Luke's car was still in the parking lot after school, which it wasn't. I jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked to see Michael was standing beside me. "Do you want me to take you home? I'm sure the buses have left by now." He offered. I nodded silently and followed my friend to his car.

"Did you talk to Luke today?" Michael asked as soon as we got in his car, wasting no time. I shook my head and stared straight ahead as he pulled out of his parking spot. "Is that why you're mute today?"

"I guess I just don't have a lot to say." I said softly.

"Did you meet with Luke at all today?" Michael asked yet another question. I nodded again. "Ellie you have to talk. We'll be at your house in like 5 minutes."

"What do you want me to say Michael?" I snapped, throwing my hands in the air. "Do you want to hear that I really did try? That I was only turned down when I thought I was getting somewhere? Or that I'm going over to his house to try again, even though it was hard enough the first time? Was that what you wanted me to say?"

"Damn Ellie, I'm sorry. That really sucks." Michael and I made eye contact for a second before he focused back on the road. I rested my head back against the seat, letting out a long breath. I knew Michael had run out of supportive things to say, so the rest of the ride was spent in silence.

"Thanks for taking me home." I thanked my friend as I undid my seat-belt. "I'll see you tomorrow at the normal time." I said the goodbye words but I didn't actually move from the passenger seat. I looked out the window at Luke's house, knowing he was in there waiting.

"Ell," Michael spoke softly, "my meter is running." That managed to get a smile out of me. "Get out now. I have high paying customers waiting for me." He continued to joke. I opened the door and stepped out, closing the door behind me. Michael waved before he drove away to his next taxi stop.

I spun on my heels and walked in the direction of Luke's house. I wasn't sure if I should knock on the door or just walk in. After moments of consideration I raised my balled up hand to the door, lightly knocking on it. Two knocks later Liz swung open the door with a bright smile on her face. "Ellie!" She greeted cheerfully. "I haven't seen you in a while!" She ushered me into her house, "how are you?"

"I'm great." I lied and tried for a genuine smile. It was hard to be any type of sad around Liz. She was such a cheery and excited person that she made you want to be too. "Is Luke here?"

"Of course! I think he's somewhere upstairs. You know the way." She laughed before sauntering off to the living room. I followed what Liz said and allowed myself to walk upstairs. I looked down each side of the hallway seeing that all doors were closed, except for one. Luke's room. The door was ajar and sunlight filled the room. I saw Luke laying on his bed staring at his phone with his headphones in. The door creaked when I opened it slightly but that didn't phase him. I figured slamming the door shut wouldn't please anyone in this house. My next instinct was to knock over the desk chair that was placed next to the door. Not even at his desk.

The sound of the chair hitting the floor made Luke shoot up from his bed, tearing his headphones from his ears in the process. "What the hell, Ellie?" Confusion and anger flooded his face as he looked from me to the chair.

"I wanted to get your attention." I said nonchalantly. I did him a favor and picked up the chair, seeing how concerned he was.

"You almost gave me a fucking heart attack!" His voice was angrier and louder this time. Luke calmed down after looking at me and the chair with anger. "Anyways."

"You wanted me here because of that math test that was so important." I said shyly. The mood of the room changed very quickly once he calmed down. "I just wanted to clear things up and try to be less of a shitty girlfriend."

"You're not a shitty girlfriend, Ell." Luke sighed, throwing his phone and headphones onto his bed. He grabbed my hand and sat me down on the chair I just picked up. He grabbed the sides and rolled it over next to his bed. Luke sat across from me, with one hand on my knee. It felt nice, his touch on my skin. "You couldn't be a shitty girlfriend even if you tried. You're too nice." When Luke said things like that it made me wonder if he forgot about when I hated him.

"So you know why this is extremely hard for me?" Luke nodded understandingly. "It's all my fault." I cupped my face in my hands, complaining loudly. "I didn't want things to be this way. Julia is so pissed at me it's unbelievable. I don't know what I could do to change it." There was actually one thing I knew I could do but I hoped it wouldn't come to that.

The other option was ending things with Luke. I didn't want to take away the one thing that made me the happiest, even if it meant making someone else happy. I couldn't win at this point. Someone was going to lose this battle and I had a feeling it was going to be me.

"Ellie I get what you're feeling." It was such a relief to hear those words come out of Luke's mouth. The last couple days I've been wondering if he would understand. "I love you." His light blue eyes filled with compassion met mine, making all my insides turn into goo. "I don't want you to worry that this is going to affect anything." Wrong. It has already affected how Julia looks at me. "I'm sure Julia will cool down after a while. She just needs to be mad, Ell."

"You don't know her at all, Luke." I huffed at my boyfriend. "I stabbed my own sister in the back. She has a right to hate me for eternity."

Luke looked defeated. Knowing that no matter what he could say wouldn't help. "You just need something to take your mind off of it." I laughed at the thought. Nothing could let my mind wander from this. "I take that as a challenge." He raised an eyebrow.

"It's not, Luke."

"We'll see about that, Elizabeth." He bent forward and kissed me. It was a short kiss but it gave me a little hope that everything was going to be okay. He pushed the rolling chair, with me still on it, towards the door. "I have a lot of planning to do now."

I stood up and looked at Luke who made his way to his chair-less desk. He opened and closed drawers, looking for something. "Ellie I need you to leave if this is ever going to work." I pouted, leaving the room. I shut his door just slightly. Slightly enough for me to hear him say that he loved me. I don't think he knew I heard it, assuming I was farther away.

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author's note

LUKE IS SO CUTE THA T HE STILL SAIF HE LOVED HE R EVEN THOUGH HE DIDN'T THINK SHE WAS STILL THERE W T F

ALSO I JUST KINDA ENDED IT LIKE THAT BC I DIDN'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO.