Nothing // l.h

Chapter 17

I walked down the empty halls after school on Tuesday. I stayed after for math tutoring. I made one last stop at my locker before heading outside. I grabbed the rest of my books and walked into the sunlight.

I saw Michael waiting for me by his car like I had asked. "Sorry it took so long." I apologized after we were both in his car.

"It's fine. I know how hard it is for you." He said sympathetically. Math was never my strong suit, no matter what type. "So I haven't seen you in a while. Always so busy with Luke."

"Well lucky for you, you'll be seeing me a lot more." I mumbled, playing with the hem of my skirt.

"Did something happen with Luke? If he hurt you I'll kick his ass." He looked at me concerningly. "I knew he was no good."

"No, Michael. He's fine, it's fine. He didn't do anything." I bit down on my bottom lip, debating if I should explain.

"Then what's the problem? I thought you liked Luke? Plus I think Ashton and Calum are just standing by for you to get rid of him anyways." He explained, keeping his gaze on the road.

"I don't know what I like anymore. It's just confusing." I sighed rubbing my face with my hands.

"I hope you still like me." He joked as he pulled into my driveway. "Looks like you have a guest."

"Maybe if we back out right now he won't see us." I said softly. I didn't feel like seeing Luke ever since I left so abruptly the other day. Michael gave me the look that said I needed to get out of his car. I did what the look granted and got out. I watched Michael back out into the street and drive away, before turning my attention to Luke.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, looking down at the blonde haired and blue eyed boy sitting on my steps.

"You've been ignoring me at school, you haven't opened your curtains, you haven't called me since I gave you my number. You're ignoring me, Ellie. I thought we had a thing going but now you revert to your old ways." Luke stood up and crossed his arms, 

"We did have a thing going, and it was nice for a while, I guess." I drifted off. 

"Why can't you ever just talk to me, Ellie? I mean I can't be that hard to talk to. It may seem like all I want to do is smoke and make out with you, but it is much more than that." Luke explained, leaning against the railing. 

"Luke I don't want to talk about this now. Just go home. I've had a long day." I hung my head and walked past him. I wish I locked the door behind me because all he did was follow me inside. "You're very persistent." I said as I collapsed on the couch.

"I know, it's one of my many talents." He smiled as he sat next to me. "What's up?" 

"I told you I didn't want to talk about it." I reminded him. I needed to figure out a way to get Luke out without having to talk a lot.

"Ellie, come on. We have to."

I sighed, figuring I have to deal with this sooner or later. "I can't do this anymore Luke." He looked confused from the moment I opened my mouth. "You and me, it can't work out. I can't make it work out. There's no point to it anymore."

"I disagree." He started to tap his index finger against the back of the couch. "I'm all in here, Ellie. I don't want you to just quit on me. This isn't some game that you can quit because you're tired of it. We're neighbors remember?"

"It can't work if we're not both invested in it equally. I still like you but I just can't do it. I'm sorry Luke." I looked down at the couch, trying to avoid as much eye contact as possible.

"If you still like me then why are we having this conversation?" He rolled his eyes. I hated the thought of telling Luke the truth, but I needed to at some point if this was going to continue. I had Luke, as much as I hated to admit it, I did. He seemed to not care about any other girls. It made it that much harder to tell him the truth. 

"Because there's something I haven't told you. To be honest I'm surprised you haven't figured it out yourself." I shrugged, making eye contact again. He gave me a concerned look, a look I didn't like to see on anyone. "You knew my sister, Julia, she's a year younger than us. You obviously don't remember but it was last year, around this time."

"I really don't remember anything about her. I didn't even know you had a sister until I came over that one time. But even then I didn't recognize her." He told me.

"Of course not." I muttered.

"I'm still confused."

"Around this time last year was when she decided that she wanted to go to boarding school." I took a deep breath before continuing. "She wanted to leave because of you."

"But we were juniors last year. Why would I want to hang around with a sophomore?" He questioned. 

"Luke will you just listen and not interrupt me for five minutes!" I yelled, making him jump a little. Him constantly interrupting me started to make me mad, and I didn't want to be mad when I had this conversation. "She left because you pressured her into so many things, like smoking and drinking. My mom hated it when she came back and smelled like smoke. She didn't know where my sister was even coming from smelling like that. Eventually, after I guess two months, Julia couldn't take it anymore. She talked with my parents and had them send her to some weird boarding school. She hated the way she acted after she met you and how she let herself be. You're the reason I my sister can't even call us anymore. She's only allowed phone time three times a week and for ten minutes."

"Can I talk now?" He asked in a hushed tone. I nodded. "Ellie I'm sorry that I was obviously such a dick. Is that why you're so afraid of me and how I make you feel?" I didn't say anything as he got closer to me. "I don't know if you're still mad at me or what."

"I don't know either, Luke." 

"Do you think you would be somewhat willing to give me another chance? You can't let what happened with your sister affect how you actually feel. I know it may seem bad or wrong, but that's half the fun, right?" He got closer, close enough for me to feel his hot breath on my skin. "I don't know if it's okay to say that I like you way more than I liked your sister." He put his hand on the small of my back. "Don't be afraid, Ellie." He moved his hand under my shirt, rubbing my back. He leaned in and softly pressed his lips to mine. The feeling I got when I felt his lip ring came back. It was a feeling I enjoyed having. Maybe Michael and Luke were right. Maybe I shouldn't let the past affect my decisions now. 

I went with the flow and kissed him back. Luke kissed me harder and slipped his tongue inside my mouth once he realized I enjoyed it. "Trust me." He muttered as he kissed my neck and my collarbone. 

**

AUTHOR'S NOTE

will this lead to some smut? is she too forgiving or is should she fight more on the soft subject of her sister? idk.

gwyn