Nothing // l.h

Chapter 10

I wasn't sure what possessed me to want to go see Luke on Sunday like he wanted. After I saw the note on his window, I seriously considered it for at least an hour. At the end of two episodes of How I Met Your Mother I didn't think it was a terrible idea. I mean I wanted to know if Luke sucked at writing songs or not. Michael called once but I didn't tell him my decision or even what Luke did. I would tell him eventually, probably after it happened. I did tell my mother, and when I did she laughed.

"Why are you laughing at me? I thought you wanted me to get to know Luke." I questioned her at dinner on Saturday. My father was working late so we decided to go out to dinner. 

"Sweetie," she started, "I gave up on the thought of you becoming friends with Luke a long time ago. I knew from the moment your sister said she wanted to go to boarding school." My mom didn't know about the situation with my Julia. She just thought that Julia was becoming a 'very well shaped young woman' and that I should follow her, even though she was actually a year younger than me.

"It's not like I'm planning on being his friend. I'm just going to listen to his song and then leave. That's it." I promised her.

"Sounds like this thing friends do, it's called hanging out." I didn't appreciate her sarcasm toward the situation at hand. I rolled my eyes and shoveled the spaghetti in my mouth. 

When I got home that night I called Ashton.

"Hey what are you doing tomorrow? I was thinking we could get together." Up until that moment I wasn't paying much attention to what he was talking about. I knew that he was talking about last Thursday's basketball game, a sport I didn't care at all about. 

"I have plans." I said coolly. With Ashton, he could tell when you were lying, it was like another sense for him. I should have elaborated. Now he was going to grill me until I said exactly what I was doing that would prevent us from hanging out. 

"With who? Calum is going on a date and Michael is cramming for a test Monday." There was a long pause for a moment. "Are you keeping something from me, Ellie?" I couldn't tell him, he would never speak to me again. That sounded a little over dramatic and exaggerated, but trust me it wasn't. 

"No I'm going to visit my sister." I braced myself for what he would say next. Julia went to a boarding school that was four hours away. That's why I was surprised when he believed me and told me he was tired and wanted to go to bed. I hung up with Ashton and looked at my own clock.

Before going to bed I went to shut my blinds. I saw the glow of a TV coming from Luke's window. The room was dark and the TV illuminated the room. The note was still on the window but Luke had moved it to the bottom pane. 

**

Even though I was having second thoughts about meeting Luke, I still found myself standing outside the bookstore at four. Actually I had arrived at three thirty, because I sure as hell didn't want to be the last one here. Luke would probably be leaning up against the building smoking, and when I came near he would smirk at me like he always did. I sat against the building and read my book while I waited. 

I looked down at my phone. It was four fifteen. I knew I shouldn't have gotten here before him. I turned off my phone and returned to reading. "At it again, huh?" I looked up and saw Luke. He wore a backwards maroon snapback and a shirt from a band I've never heard of, black jeans to match. It amazed me how he dressed just like his personality declared. Which was like an asshole and thinking he's cooler than everyone else around him. "Still reading that book?" He sunk down and sat next to me. 

"I just started it a couple days ago, Luke." I explained. I looked at him and something was missing. "I thought you would let me hear your song." He sighed and hung his head. "You weren't going to play me your song, where you?" 

"I was." He perked up, as if having some really good explanation for why he showed up empty handed. "But I haven't finished it."

"I'm not sure I believe you." I closed my book and looked at him. His blue eyes looked at me and I saw them in a new way. It was almost like they didn't even match his personality. He looked somewhat upset. "Was that why you were late? You didn't know what to do?" Why did I think coming here was a good idea? I should've known that something was going to happen. After all this was Luke Hemmings. 

"I'm telling the truth." He said, reaching into his back pocket and pulling something out. "Here's proof." He handed me a folded piece of paper. It was torn in some places and really wrinkled.

"What is this?" 

"Just look at it, jeez. You ask so many unnecessary questions." He groaned, resting his head up against the wall. He reached into his front pocket and pulled out a cigarette and a lighter. He lit up and breathed in the smoke, blowing it out a few seconds later.

I rolled my eyes at his actions and unfolded the piece of paper. Quickly scanning over it I realized that he was telling the truth. He seemed to have most of it done, except the last couple lines. "This isn't that bad." I nodded, folding the paper back up and giving it to him. 

"Did you think it was going to be awful?" He sounded surprised. I opened and closed my mouth, trying to find the right words to say. "You did. That's just great. You know I thought that you saw just a little something in me. Something that wasn't complete failure." He inhaled the smoke again and puffed it out. 

"Stop trying to make everything about you!" I almost yelled. "That's why not everyone likes you! The world surprisingly does not revolve around Luke Hemmings." He was so egotistical.

"Don't you think I know that? I'm not stupid, Ellie." He shook his head and put out his cigarette butt on the ground.

"No wonder she left." I mumbled to myself. Luke turned and looked at me, confused by what I said. "Is there any other need for me to be here or can I leave?" 

"Hang on." He said. He was just looking at me. He told me to wait but he just sat there looking at me like I was a piece in a museum. Before I got up something happened. Something I would never expect to happen. Luke's lips were on mine before I knew it. I didn't have time to react so I just sat there with my lips against his. He tugged on my shirt, wanting me to do something. In the heat of the moment I kissed him back, closing my eyes. His lip ring cold against my mouth and his left hand moved up to cup the side of my face. What was happening? Why was this happening? 

"Luke." I stopped, pushing him away from me. "I have to go." I put my phone in my pocket and grabbed my book. "I can't do this. I made a mistake. This was a mistake." I got up, feeling my heart pounding inside my chest. 

"Ellie come on." He started, rising up from his spot. I shook my head and brushed hair out of my face. "It's fine we were just kissing. A lot of people do it." But I didn't do it, not with people like Luke anyways. "I'll take you home if you need. I assume you walked here."

"I'll walk home, too." I said. I looked at the people coming in and out of the bookstore, not wanting to make any eye contact. "I'm sorry I just need to go." I held my book closer to my chest as I walked away. 

"You're being ridiculous!" I heard him call after me. I didn't care what I was being. I just knew that I kissed the last person on the Earth that I would want to kiss. All kinds of thoughts were swimming through my head right  now. I couldn't deal with them so I went to the one place I knew I could get a distraction. Michael's house.

**

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

that was fun