Invisible Halo (MGK Fanfic)

Chapter 20

Colson pov

When I woke up I decided to go for a walk before everyone got up. Yesterday was too much to handle and yet it was all I could think about. The way she broke up the kiss was enough for me to feel ashamed and what would I tell the guys?

Shit! Slim! I thought to myself.

Slim had been my best friend since we were eleven years old and I had just kissed his sister last night. The betrayal was extremely real and to him of all people.

When I got on the bus after it went down I was too prideful to say no to having sex with some girls from backstage. I was a lady's man but after kissing the pure lips of Monica I knew no other women would ever amount to that.

I heard footsteps behind me; That's funny since when did anyone bother to wake up before 9:00 A.M. I thought.

"Can we talk?" Monica asked from behind me.

My heart instantly dropped and my fear engulfed me.

Was she going to leave early? Did she regret ever meeting me?

"Um....Yeah." I said nervously, not making any types of eye contact or sudden changes in body movements.

She walked up next to me and gestured to the bench that was to my right. We both sat down and I knew I'd be the one listening while Monica would be the one talking.

"About yesterday.." She said staring at the ground.

I then knew I wasn't the only person here who this affected and who was embarrassed. I had never once wondered how shameful she must have felt after kissing me. I nodded giving her a smile of reassurance and waited for her to continue.

"I don't really have much to say about it. Although I didn't mean to make you feel bad if I did in any way." She said slowly and gracefully.

While she stared at the ground I looked at her face, examining every little detail. The dimple that was nonexistent today, the wrinkles by her eyes when she smiles, her beautiful brown skin and the warmth that naturally came with her.

I wanted to do it again, I wanted her, she had to be mine but it would never happen. For just another chance to wrap my lips against hers would be a miracle.

"You didn't! Make me feel bad. I didn't mean to put that sort of vibe out there, it was just uncommon." I said.

She started giggling and it made the nervousness come back. What was so funny?

"I know such a disappointment, probably the worst kiss you've had in awhile." She said mocking herself.

"No! Was it that noticeable?" I said sarcastically.

We started laughing together and it felt good, after last night I honestly wouldn't have pictured her even talking to me.

"I'm sorry." I said reaching for her hand and breaking her laughter.

"It's okay, I needed the practice." She said, her dimples surfacing for the first time today.

"Why is that, you were a natural!" I said.

"Yeah, naturally terrible."

When she said that last line she had looked me in the eyes for the first time since last night. Her green eyes were always filled with hope and kindness while mine blue as ice resembled the opposite.

"Can we keep this between us? Slim would probably commit murder and than throw my remains in the ocean." I said.

"Deal, you don't touch me and I don't touch you! By the way, you wouldn't have been the first guy I hid from Slim." She said mockingly.

That was the thing how was I not going to let temptation get the best of me if she was always going to be around. I couldn't imagine a life without her, so I guess keeping my feelings to myself was my only option. But other guys? She seemed so pure and innocent there was no way. She had probably never had sex before, not with Slim as a brother.

"We should probably get back on the bus, everybody's probably up by now." Monica said, biting her lip.

I pretended not to notice because it would only lead me to the exact same situation as yesterday. I wondered if her biting her lip was out of emotion or just trying to mess with my mind. We walked to the bus talking about performing and the schedule for today.

"Look what the cat drug in." Ashley said pointing at Monica and I.

"Dude where have y'all been? We've been looking for you guys!" Rook said.

"Looking for us or food?" Monica asked sarcastically to Rook as he had a half eaten bagel in his hand.

"Chill! We went out for a walk, being cramped on this bus isn't the best for active people." I said.

"Oh true, so what's the plan for the day?" Rook asked.

"One performance at 1:00 and the rest of the day is for us to do whatever we want." I said.

"Wow, that sounds relaxing!" Ashley said enthused.

"The tour just started, what are you complaining about Ash?" Dub said coming from the back.

"You guys woke the bear out of his cage!" Monica said.

Everyone busted out laughing. Beautiful? Check! Sense of humor? Check. Amazing kisser? Triple check!! I would never stop thinking about her in that way anymore she was no longer a friend but someone I found myself tripping for.

We walked to the venue and everyone went their separate ways to their own dressing rooms except for Monica and I.

"Mohawk time?" She asked.

"If you'll do the honors." I said handing her the gel and my comb.

I sat in the chair facing the mirror so I would be able to look up at her and analyze her features. She was a good looking women and I couldn't help but stare, her body spoke of such originality that it almost scared me. Monica finished up my Mohawk and before she left she gave me a good luck hug. I wish the hug could've lasted forever and that she would speak on her feelings instead of laughing them off like earlier.

What am I going to do with her? I thought to myself.

It was an honest thought, I wouldn't be able to love her like she deserved but I also wouldn't be able to leave her alone. I couldn't mess this up for Casie either, she needs a good female role model and Monica was just the person. Just in the weeks I had known her she had taught me more about myself than anyone has in years.