Defective - Jacob Black {1}

Chapter 37: Icy Exchanges

I stared up at the nearly empty Cullen house. It was like my brain had wired itself to absorb everything as if it was the last time I was going to see it and it was driving me insane. I didn't want to think about dying, why I couldn't I be as confident as everyone else?

"What are you doing out here?" Edward's voice called from the porch steps and I moved my eyes from looking at my bedroom window to him.

"Just looking." I shrugged nonchalantly. He didn't buy it.

"Aria," He began but I shook my head as I started towards him.

"Yes, everything will be fine." I finished for him as I stomped past him up the stairs.

"Everyone is out hunting still, they should be back soon. Bella is upstairs getting changed." He explained as I stalked past him.

"Well I'll be up in my room until then." I announced, my brain already wanting to take a mental picture of my beautiful Cullen bedroom.

"Alrighty then." Edward shoved his hands into his pockets, silently agreeing to let me be for the next few hours, he was probably going to let Bella know that too.

The clouds were looming darkly leaving hardly any natural light to fill my room and bounce of the mirrors. I threw myself onto my bed and gathered up my quilt around me breathing it in. Stranely it smelt of Esme and that comforted me greatly, once this was all over and done with and if we actually win this tomorrow I needed a supernatural mother-daughter talk. Some boy advice would be helpful.

An hour or two passed before Alice burst into my room all smiles and humming to herself. "What are you so happy about?" I mumbled into my pillow as my face was stuffed into it.

"You shall find out soon enough." She beamed at me, her bright white teeth on show. "Now let's get you packed. I think there's a storm coming and even you will be cold tonight." She skipped around my bed towards the closet door behind me.

"I thought I wasn't going until this evening?" I asked, slowly sitting up from the bed to follow her.

"Change of plans." She began as she pulled out a small backpack from one of the bag compartments. "Carlisle and Esme would prefer it if you weren't out travelling alone. I can't see you properly anymore since you let the dog back in." I groaned irritably as I sunk down on the small, plush couch in the middle of the room.

"Really?" I asked exasperatedly. Why does he have to ruin everything?

"Yup. It sucks." She stuffed a woolly beanie hat and some gloves into the bag rather aggressively.

"I kissed him last night." I admitted and she froze before her golden eyes shot to me.

"You what!" She hissed, placing her hands on her hips ready to scold me. She was the furthest thing from intimidating but I let her be.

I sat up and propped myself up on one elbow. "It was a goodbye kiss!" I said trying to defend myself. "Like I know it was a stupid idea but just the thought of possibly not seeing him ever again ran through my mind. And," I added quickly, "what if one of us dies tomorrow, we needed that possible last kiss!"

Then it dawned on me and my mouth fell open into a sort of 'O' shape.

"Damnit!" I hissed, punching a fist into one of the couch cushions. "I'm going to see him in a few hours!" I buried my face back into couch completely humiliated.

"Oh, sweetie." Her voice seemed closer and when I felt her place her cold hand against my back I knew she was beside me. "I get it I really do. I can't empathise with you because I've never been in this situation, I had Jasper and that was that." I turned my face to send her daggers. "But I can sympathise. You're torn between wanting him and knowing what's right. I wish I could help you I really do. Or at least see when the mutt straightens himself out." She grimaced, still agitated by her lack of seeing the pack.