The Beautiful Hummingbird - Part I

Love Letter Nineteen

Monday, 31st March 2014

The Loch Cottage, Loch Ness, Scotland.

My Darling Natasha,

To see how broken you were ripped right through me and practically shredded me apart from the inside out.  I'd come this far and wasn't going to walk away from you without a fight.

When you said I had no right to call you Natasha that really hit me hard, like a punch in the gut.  But, you were right I had no right whatsoever, I hadn't earned the right.  But I would earn it back, of that I was determined.

Then you followed up about promises, that practically broke me there and then.  My heart was beating so hard in my chest that I felt sick, my whole body was shaking. 

What had I done to you, my beautiful girl.      

Despite the fact I knew your barriers were firmly back up and you were doing everything in your power to push me away, I was not going to give up that easily.  I had to be resilient, to make you listen to me and listen to the truth.  If necessary, I would beg for your forgiveness because I loved you more than anything.   

At first, you seemed resigned to the fact that no amount of explanation would change anything but as I kept talking and trying to make you understand that we had been played against each other, I could see you beginning to question everything and your resolve wavered.

Brazen had spun a web of lies to manipulative both of us for their own gain.  The fact was we had fallen for their deceit because we didn't trust in each other enough.  That could have been our downfall but we were stronger than Brazen had bargained for.

I had done all I possibly could to make you understand the truth and my heart was literally in my mouth waiting for your response.  I knew it wouldn't come with words but with actions and when you held out your hand to me I lost a breath for one moment.  I crawled into your arms and we both broke down in a mix of hurt and anger over what had happened, pain at what we could have lost but ultimately, sheer relief that we had found our way back to each other.

We sat wrapped up in each other on the hillside and watched the sunrise over the Loch.  I believed then and still do in the strength of love above all else and that morning I had been proved right, love had conquered all.   

I vowed to myself that from that day forward nothing would ever break our bond again. 

My love is always yours, H.x

PS:  You were now my priority and spending as much time in this spectacular setting for however long was necessary was the most important thing.