The Beautiful Hummingbird - Part I

Love Letter Twenty-One

Friday, 4th April 2014

The Loch Cottage, Loch Ness, Scotland.

My Darling Natasha,

We spent a week together in Scotland.  No one knew where we were and it felt amazing to just be us with no interference from the outside world.  Time, space and each other was all we wanted and needed.

Of course we talked through what happened but once straight in both our minds, we decided that we would park those negative thoughts for the remaining days to focus positively on each other. 

We spent time cuddled up together on the sofa, we spent time wrapped around each other in bed and we spent time laughing with and at one another.  We walked along remote pathways hand in hand to enjoy the unspoilt views of the breathtaking Loch and we admired the beautiful scenery and the feeling of it being just us, free to breathe and take advantage of the untainted fresh air and remote calm setting. 

The most important thing for me was that you smiled.  They weren't half hearted small smiles either but big cheesy happy grin smiles.  We were together and I felt truly blessed.

I remember the night we had a wonderful dinner in the pub by the Loch at the bottom of the hill.  It was a long wait for a taxi so we decided to walk back up the hill.  That was a good decision until the heavens opened and we got soaked in the torrential downpour. 

I piggybacked you up to the house and ran around the garden with your scared but delightful screaming and your laughter egging me on to keep teasing you.  That's until a clap of thunder so loud scared the shit out of me!

We were laughing so hard we could barely strip our wet clothes off each other.  We were so close and we explored each other in the darkness.  The lightening lit up the room and our naked reflections were visible in the window.  You felt absolutely breathtaking in my arms and the sounds that fell from your mouth when I touched you were exquisite.  We fitted together perfectly and when you wrapped your legs around me and tangled your fingers through my wet hair it was incredible.  You truly let go with me that night when we made love to each other.

We decided we were ready to return home.  We stopped over night at Mum's in Holmes Chapel.  She greeted us both with open arms and unconditional love as I knew she would.  I could see how important you were to her even then.  The responsibility to look after you, guide and protect you since your mum died was evident but it wouldn't be until much later that I would find out why the bond you both shared was so strong. 

We returned to London and I had the important task of co-ordinating the band and lawyers to meet up at Brazen's offices.  Turning up unannounced and en masse shocked everyone, including the normally aggressive Will.

It was widely accepted in the industry that when individuals had connections with artists and ceased those connections, whether it be of a personal nature or of a business/working relationship, they would often be contacted and on some occasions incentivised with financial reward to keep them from speaking to media outlets. This was all handled above board and in the knowledge of the artist, management company, lawyers and individual concerned. Contracts and paperwork were legally prepared and binding, as were the transfer of funds.    

In our case, none of Will's actions were company procedure or legally above board.  He had acted unlawfully through the whole debacle.  He had accessed my telephone records without permission and used outside sources to illegally obtain information about you.  On top of that he had tried to blackmail you to disappear using false information and pictures about my supposed personal relationship with Eden Scott.

The other directors of Brazen were shocked by my accusations. 

Our lawyers pointed out that Clause 12.3.1 stated that 'professionally neither artist nor management will enter into any situation deemed unlawful or ultimately break the law'. 

Brazen's lawyers replied that obtaining the information about you was necessary as per Clause 14.1.6, 'the artist shall inform management of a change in personal circumstances'.  I had a change of personal circumstances but had kept it quiet.

Our lawyers counter-argued however that my relationship with you was in its infancy and as it was still private between the two of us and not public property, there was no need to divulge the information. Brazen had unlawfully found out about my change in personal circumstances and rather than speaking directly to me as they should have done, they had tried to use false information to their advantage.

Will smirked that this would never stand up in a court of law, that you had accepted the payment and signed the paperwork.  I took the greatest of pleasure in confirming that it was indeed your signature on the dotted line but as a signatory for the charity.  In an attempt to gain a pound of flesh, Will made one vital error, the money didn't go through your personal bank account it went direct to the charity.  Technically, the paperwork was null and void because it wasn't legally binding and Brazen had therefore simply made a charitable donation. 

Brazen's lawyer's were furious that Will had, in effect, created copy paperwork for signature without checking with them first.  

This gave us the ammunition and Louis his long awaited moment. He confirmed we would instigate legal proceedings if we didn't get rewritten contracts on more favourable terms. The then contracts in existence were not fit for purpose.  

When we left Brazen's offices that day, the Directors were left in no doubt that when those new rewritten contracts came to an end Brazen would no longer represent the band.

My final parting words to Will, in earshot of the Directors, both sets of lawyers and the boys, were that if anyone from Brazen ever made contact with you again I would sue them so fast their feet wouldn't touch the ground.

For the first time I walked out of their offices that day with my head held high and feeling stronger in that environment than I ever had.

My love is always yours, H.x

PS:  Whilst laying in my arms one morning, of all my tattoos you especially noticed the one I got inked on tour in Sydney. The two Hummingbirds. The purple and pink bird represents you, the passion, light and joy in my life. The mated pair are us together and our eternity and life. I still feel that as I write this, even now. Such strong love and devotion for you. The most important and only colour tattoo I have permanently etched on my skin.