Hate is a strong word, but I still hate you.

Chapter five, Mom, I love you

*Rayne's POV*

She had said she loved me. I'd heard it before but this time I tensed. I had allowed her to hug me only because I wanted to gain enough of her trust to let me into her recording studio.
It was my ticket out.
If I showed her producers I could sing and write then I might make it. I could leave Taylor and that would be the end.
I could maybe even live with Katy. Maybe.
Taylor fell asleep and her grasp stayed strong. I wanted to grab my phone and call Katy but it was just out of my reach.
I struggled for a good ten minutes before I managed to wriggle free. I grabbed my phone and stood outside of the hotel room.
After seventeen attempts Katy answered.
"Who is it?" An angry Katy whispered down the line.
"Katy. It's Rayne."  I said. I heard a groan and some squeaking. "Were you in bed?"
"Not anymore honey, what's up?"
"Where's John?" I asked.
"He's upstairs, in bed. Why?"
"It's Taylor. Where was John at about seven this morning?"
"I don't know, I was asleep. He wasn't in bed when I woke up though, why?"
"Because I saw him. He came over and raped Taylor." I checked on Taylor as Katy stuttered down the line. Taylor was still asleep.
When I got back outside Katy had managed to form a sentence.
"What should I do?"
"Stay away from him, please. I don't want you getting hurt too." There was a sniff from the other end of the line and a muffled voice.
"It's too late, Rayne." I heard Katy sobbing as the line went dead. I dropped my phone and followed it to the floor. A moment later Taylor's hand was on my shoulder.
"What happened?" She asked. I grabbed my phone and barged past. I threw my phone on to the bed and grabbed a pillow.

*Taylor's POV*

Rayne thrust her face to the pillow and screamed. When she pulled it away she threw it across the room and it hit a vase, shattering it. Flowers dropped to the floor and water seeped everywhere. I threw a towel down and collected all of the shards of glass, wrapping them up and leaving a note for house keeping.
I ran over to her as she was about to punch the headboard. I grabbed her wrist and with her other fist she gently hit my collarbone before her head took her fists place. It was her turn to cry hysterically. She kept punching my shoulder softly as she cried.
At one point she bit my shirt to stop herself from screaming. When I let go of her wrist she wrapped her arms around my waist and began to tap her head against my collarbone.
She ran out of tears after about an hour and was reduced to ragged breathing.
"What happened sweetie?" I asked resting my head on hers, stopping her from banging her head.
"It's John." Was all she could whisper.
"What happened?" I asked again, my voice catching.
"He ... Katy ... Too." She muttered between sharp breaths. Her fists clenched the back of my shirt and she screamed with her mouth closed. "Bastard." She muttered.
"Rayne!" I gasped sarcastically, hoping to cheer her up.
"What?" She looked up at me. I smiled and she began to cry again.
"Taylor?" She asked, putting her head back in my chest.
"Yes."
"What would you do if you had a child that had ADHD?" I felt her tense.
"I would still love you, even if you don't love me." I said, kissing the top of her head.
"Thanks Taylor." She relaxed again and snuggled closer to me.
"Taylor?" She asked again.
"Yes?" This, again, was my reply.
"I'm supposed to hate you because I'm a Katycat but sometimes I really care. Like when you were sick earlier. I passed it off as my ... condition, but can I love you too?" She asked.
"Yes." I whispered.
"Katy was there for me every single time that the blade almost took me. You were a hero too but then that stuff happened with the back-up dancers and I really did hate you. When I met you though and got to know you as a person, not from the media, I started to care and I didn't like it, at all. When I starved myself it was easy, I've done it so many times before but I don't want to. I want help Taylor, I want help for my ... condition. Oh, and stop saying 'yes'. Find a more interesting word, mom, I love you."
I felt my heart stop and I began to cry.
"I love you too." I whispered.
She called me mom. I've waited fourteen years for that and when I got her back I was afraid it was never going to happen.
I felt an itch in the back of my nose and I sneezed, and again, and again. The third time my stomach contracted and I vomited all down Rayne's back.
"Sorry." I mumbled as I ran to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet.
Ten minutes later Rayne came in and rubbed my back. She had changed. The vomiting soon stopped and Rayne helped me to bed. She had stripped the bed of its covers and made up a hot water bottle. I pressed it to my stomach and curled back up around Rayne, under the covers.
"Taylor?" Rayne whispered. It was like a punch to the stomach. She had just called me 'mom'.
"Y- what?" I stopped myself from saying 'yes' but instead I sounded rude. Rayne laughed.
"You can say 'yes'. So, does my name have a specific meaning? Like Taylor means 'eternal beauty'." I heard her snort.
"Hey! Yes. It means 'strong councillor' or something but I liked the sound of it. That's the only reason I chose it." I put my chin on top of her head and fell back asleep before she could ask anymore questions.