Blue Coffee Mugs and the Agoraphobic [boyxboy] ✔

Successes

TWENTY FOUR

drought (n.)
a prolonged period of abnormally low rainfall; a shortage of water resulting from this

*two months later*
(they've known each other for about four months now)

"Austin! I's finally working!", I exclaim happily. I'm currently standing about five feet away from my house on the sidewalk, smiling at Austin who is making his way towards me across the street.

It's been a little over two months since I've had my first success with going outside. Now I'm finally comfortable (almost) with going (almost) anywhere on my street as long as I can still see my house.

My therapist Anna showed me some special breathing techniques to control possible panic attacks while outside. It's been working really well lately and I'm very proud of myself. It's obviously still not perfect, but it is getting a lot better every day, since I've been working on it really hard.

"Hey, babe", Austin says, grinning at me as he leans down to give me a quick kiss on the lips. I blush at the nickname. "You're getting really good, huh?". I nod, "Yeah, it's amazing. Promise that you will take me to the woods and a library and to your job?" He laughs, "I promise. although my job is kind of boring - I'm just saying; I simply make and serve coffee for hours."

"See? That's a great job! Why do you think I want to come?" He shrugs, "I don't really know. I can't give you any free coffee, if that's the reason." I roll my eyes, "I get free coffee at home, dumbass."

"Wow, no need to insult me", he gasps jokingly and presses his hand to his chest in mock hurt. I shake my head at him, smiling. I honestly could look at him for hours, just watching all the little things he does. Like blinking, or licking his lips or scratching his nose. Honestly, if anyone would've told me I was going to think cheesy things like that half a year ago, I would've rolled my eyes at them and said something like: "Watching someone do stuff like that is about as interesting as watching an apple slice slowly turn brown. No thanks."

But with Austin, it's like everything about him is interesting no matter what it is. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to call what I'm feeling for him, but I know that I cannot not think about him.

It's strange, because I could be brushing my teeth, or listening to someone tell a story, or reaching for a glass in the cupboard and my thoughts will just drift towards his face and the way he smells and what he will possibly say or wear the next time I see him.

"Alan?", his quiet yet firm voice snaps me out of my thoughts, "Are you coming?" I nod, following him into the house and up to my room.

Austin reads to me for a while, while we're cuddling in bed.

After we've finished a few chapters, I place my head in his lap and look up at him.

Austin's POV

His head's in my lap, I'm running my fingers through his beautiful ginger hair and for once, he's not complaining about it. I know he hates it. I frown when I hear him sigh. I guess I'm just so overprotective, that the smallest a sign of him being unhappy, like a sigh, makes me want to fix it immediately and make him feel better. "You won't leave me, right, Austin?", he asks. The question catches me off guard. Why would he think that? "No", I say immediately. "Promise?", he whispers. "Promise."

He sighs and gets up from the bed, "I'll go get a drink."

It's for the better, Austin. It really is. You know it is, you have to do it.

I take a deep breath and try to concentrate on anything but my thoughts. Soon, Alan is back with just a glass of water. He sits down next to me on the bed again, spilling half of the water over my shirt in the process.

He gasps, "I'm so sorry, let me get you a-"
"No, no, it's fine", I laugh, I'll just take off the shirt if that's okay with you. Put it on the heater and I'll put it back on when I leave."

"Not complaining", Alan smirks (but blushes either way) as I take my shirt off. He walks over to the heater in his room and places the shirt on it before, once again, sitting down.

He moves closer to me, shivering, "Yes, you're even warmer like this." I smile and put my arms around him as he places his head on my chest.

"Your heart his beating really fast.", he remarks. "Yeah, well, that'd be your fault.", I say. Alan giggles and presses his lips to the skin right above the thumping machine in my ribcage.

He's absolutely perfect. "God, I love you", I whisper. As soon as it's out, I regret it. Great, Austin.

Alan sits up and looks at me with wide eyes. "No, no, not- I mean... Yes, but if you-", I stutter. I quickly silence myself and just look at him. As he realizes how panicked I'm starting to look, he quickly says something.

"Wait, like, seriously?"
"I, uh, I think so. I mean, I haven't thought about it that much, but... yeah, I guess."
Quickly, his facial expression turns from shocked/surprised to excited as he throws his arms around me, laughing.

I'm not sure what it means, but hug him back anyway. "Say it again, so I won't feel stupid, Austin.", he orders. "What? I love you?"
He grins, "Yes. I love you too."

[ok um yeah sorry about the short chapter and the big time skip but trust me it is needed or else this would have like 62528164 chapters because what I have planned needs a lot of time. The next chapter is gonna be longer and a bit more interesting too, hopefully. Thanks for reading and don't forget to comment!!]