MaNan: Breaking Free

25|Rising

Nandini's POV

I dump my bag on the bed and dash to the bathroom. Splashing cold water on my face, I look at my reflection in the mirror and trail my index finger along the spot on my neck where Manik's mouth had been not so long ago. I can still feel a shiver running down my spine.

That moment had been pure bliss. As Manik planted soft, wet kisses on my skin, my insides had gone into a tizzy. It felt so good. His strong, muscular arm wrapped around me, gave me a weird sense of happiness and security. His teeth gently nibbling at my skin and his arousal twitching so close to me had totally driven me out of my senses, wrecking havoc all the way. Even thinking about it right now, I am turning scarlet. The way he looked at me sent a cascade of butterflies invading my stomach. It felt as though a craving I didn't know I had was being satisfied.

Oh, come on! You knew full well you were having that craving. You've had it every time you have looked at him longer than 2 minutes at a go. Huh. My subconscious and her snarky remarks just don't stop.

Initially, I had thought that not talking to him would make me indifferent to him. But, what happened was the exact opposite of that. Over the last month, I have become miserable. Even more miserable than I was before I met him!

He took me on paths I had never treaded on before. He took me to a place where I found myself believing that happiness indeed is not so difficult to stumble upon. He made me happy! Only to snatch it all away and shun me into a pool of misery! I don't even understand why he had this overwhelming impact on me, when I barely knew him.

Because, for the first time, you started letting someone in!

I was so angry with him. So fucking angry. But, in that moment, as I lay pressed against him, all my anger faded away. All I could feel was hot, bubbling desire, exciting each nerve of my body.

Enough, Nandini. You CAN'T go back to that! Be strong! Build your walls up again!

Wiping my face, I come out and collapse on my bed with a groan. The door opens and Jenny enters.

"Nandu, kya hua beta?" She asks with a concerned face.

"I am so tired, Jenny." I moan.

"Of what?" She asks meaningfully.

"Of Manik."

"What happened?"

"I don't understand why he affects me so badly. Even when I am adamant on hating him, I find myself all dazzled by him. It's after a really long time that I am such a mess." I croak in frustration.

"Oh, honey!" She pulls me into a hug and places her hand on my head. "Don't let a guy give you such a hard time. You are my strong baby, aren't you?"

"I don't know." I mumble, defeated.

"Of course you are." She says proudly. "Remember our first Christmas together?"

The memory of that Christmas instantly brings a smile to my face.

"Jenny, whele is daddy?" My four year old self had asked the immensely kind and caring lady who had walked into my life a couple of weeks ago as my nanny.

"Daddy is bringing Nandu a beautiful Christmas tree with a yummy chocolate cake." She had said pulling me onto her lap, with the warmest smile I had ever seen.

"Tocolate cake! Chlistmas tlee." I had squealed in excitement.

"Yes, baby." She had gently kissed my forehead.