Chapter Eleven

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"Do you want my bed?" Calum asked.

"Yes, please." I said. It was bad enough being back in the same house with heavy memories of Ashton, but sleeping on the couch would be hell. I followed Calum up the stairs to his room and he opened the door for me.

"Thanks, a lot Calum." I said and gave him a hug.

"You're welcome." He whispered him my ear.

I broke away from our hug and gave him a smile. He left the room, closing the door quietly behind him. I sighed and padded towards the bed. I looked down for a second and saw myself in Calum's shirt and a way too big pair of his basketball shorts.I climbed into his bed and pulled the covers up to my neck. I closed my eyes and I didn't know how exhausted I was until now. Memories of me and my mother back at home flooded into my head and gave me a warm feeling. I slowly drifted to sleep, happy.

"Look man, she isn't here okay." I heard Calum's voice. I lifted my head from the pillow and checked the time, it was eight in the morning.

"She really isn't here?" I heard Ashton's voice and for once it gave me no emotion. I wasn't sad or angry I was just done with him.

"A-alright." I heard his defeated voice.

"Bye Ashton." Calum said and I heard the front door close. I slowly got out the bed and opened the door.

"Calum?" I called.

"In the kitchen!" He called and I walked down the stairs and saw him in the kitchen.

"Hey!" He said and gave me a smile. "You like orange juice?" He asked and handed me a glass of orange juice.

"Thanks." I said and took it. I took a drink of it and placed it on the counter.

"I heard Ashton." I said. "Thanks for saying I wasn't here."

"No problem. I thought you wouldn't want to speak to him."

"Yeah." I said and took another drink of orange juice."



"So do you want me to drop you off at your dorm?" Calum asked changing the subject.



"Yeah, sure." I said and went back upstairs to gather my stuff. Once I got all my stuff I followed Calum to his car and then slid into the passenger seat. For the drive I didn't talk, instead I looked out the window and at the birds flying and the trees. It was a comfortable silence. Too soon he pulled up to my dorm.



"Bye. Thanks again Calum. This will be the last time you have to do this." I said and gave him a smile.



"You're welcome." He said and returned the smile.



I shut the door and walked down the hallway and unlocked my dorm room. Once I got in there I placed my stuff on my bed and let out a big sigh. I turned around and noticed Kayla lying on the couch.



"Oh hey. I didn't think you would be home." I said and she chuckled.



"I can't get with Mikey every night." She said and we both laughed.



"So who where you with last night?" She asked and raised her eyebrow at me.



"Calum. But knock it off, we didn't do anything. We even slept in different rooms." I said when she gave me a big grin.



"You guys are so hard to keep up with. Especially you and Ashton." She said and I winced a bit at the mention of his name. Kayla checked her phone and then looked back up at me


"Well Im going to change and then Im going to get some coffee." I said and went to the bathroom to change. I put on black skinny jeans, my All Time Low T-Shirt and my black vans. I grabbed my jacket and headed out the dorm.



Walking down the street gave me time to think and process. I was surprised that Ashton wasn't waiting for me in my dorm. Maybe he finally realized that he wasn't going to get anything out of me so he moved on to another girl to torture. I walked around behind the coffee shop, almost around the bend that lead to the tables and the start of the line. I walked out from behind the bricks of the coffee shop and stopped dead. Ashton and Ava where sitting at the closest table, Ashton's back facing me. I quickly pressed myself against the wall, praying Ava didn't see me.



"Ava I don't know who else to go to. I can't take it."



"Ash." Ava said, I peeked around the corner and saw her eyes full of pain as she looked at the broken Ashton in front of her.



"She won't believe me after all the stupid shit I've done to her. I screwed everything up." Ashton said and placed his head in his hands.



"Ash please. Just talk to her. She might listen if you say the right stuff." Ava had her hand on Ashton's shoulder.



"Maybe I should just let her go. I've hurt her and she deserves someone better than me."



"I can't stand to see you so heartbroken. I have never seen you like this."



"I don't know these feeling either." He said and sighed.



"Well I have to go meet Luke now. Please just do what is best for you, I can't take seeing one of my best friends like this." She said and gave him a hug before she walked off.



I stood there, behind the coffee shop not knowing whether to run away or go up to Ashton. I decided to go with option one. I turned around and slowly started to walk away. The chill of outside seemed to seep into my body, I was shaking. Seeing Ashton broken and feeble made me want to run to him but after all that's happened I can't let my walls down now. But he seems to seep under or over the walls, he really got me and in the end I didn't want to let him go. I missed him last night, I know I did. When I was in Calum's bed I was wishing I was back under the sleek black covers of Ashton's. I wanted his arms around me and I wanted him to hold me close.



"Ren?" I heard his voice. No, I was vulnerable right now if he got me I wouldn't be able to resist. I did the only thing I could, run. I ran. I ran away from Ashton's voice screaming my name. I ran away from the pain. I ran from my problems. I ran from Ashton.



I was stopped, someone pulled me back. A familiar large hand grasped mine, his thumb slow stroking across my hand. I didn't realize I was crying until the cold wind blew in my face and cause my tears to be noticeable.



"Please baby, stop crying." He cooed into my ear, as I stood there in the middle of the sidewalk crying.



I placed my hands on his chest and pushed him away. I turned and walked away.



"Ren!"



"Don't call me that!" I spun on my heel and yelled at him. My response startled him, he stood there with his jaw hanging open.



"Please listen to me! It's not what you think!" He said. "Just give me one minute."



"You have one minute and that is it." I said.



"I didn't kiss Jess or anything last night! She texted me asking to talk so I followed her outside. She told me she wanted me and tried to kiss me. I refused telling her that I... I found someone else." He said.

"Ashton, how do I know you're not lying to me again." I said.

"Because I promised I would never hurt you again, remember."

"I.. I have to go." I said and turned my back and walked away.

Aston was silent, and so was I. I walked away from the pain, I didn't let my walls down this time and part of me was proud and the other part was calling me stupid for walking away. But the proud side won, and I won this round instead of Ashton.

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