Be Still My Heart

Chapter 1

Every day I wake up, go to school, go to study group, go home, and repeat. That is my life in a nutshell. My name is Camryn Louis and I am the poster child for the kid who only wants to make her parents proud. All A's and never breaks a rule, but to get that I ended up with no friends.

Having no friends sent me into spending a lot of time with my grandmother. She told me lots of stories, some were happy and some were not. She taught me more values than any other person or experience.

My favorite story is the one of a girl and a boy who met when they were very young and loved each other as much as any person can love another. They saw every color of the rainbow and cherished every moment they spent together. They eventually got married so they could spend every moment together. When the couple was moving into their first home together the boy fell from a ladder and hit his head. He went into a coma and suffered terrible injuries that left him to be brain dead. While in the hospital the young man died and his poor wife's vision lost all color and she saw everything in gray. While no one believed her when she said it was because her sunshine had died she knew deep inside it was true. He was the reason her world was so bright and beautiful. All of her memories of him were colorful and bright and life without him was dull and sad.

The thought of having that kind of love gave me hope, but with the life I'm living I'm not sure I will ever find the love I truly deserve. Maybe this is the universe's way of telling me I don't deserve love.

"Due to the drastic weather, all after-school activities will be canceled. I repeat all after-school activities will be canceled." That meant study group. Great. The end of the seventh period with no study group means going home early. It also means walking home because my parents are both still at work. I was bummed out until I heard the raindrops begin to hit the tin roof. As odd as it sounds it brought a smile to my face. I remember another story my grandmother told me to keep me from being sad when it rained outside.

Rain is always used to represent sadness. It's cold and usually, the sky is dark. But she always saw it differently. My grandmother loved to sit on her porch while it rained because she loved the smell. It reminded her of when she was a child and she would run around in the rain splashing in mud puddles or simply just sit on a curb and let it drench her.

Once when I was sad and it was raining she said to me "Go outside and let the rain wash away all the pain. Trust me, Penelope, you'll feel better." I did as she said and it's worked ever since.

I went to my locker and put all my things away seeing as I didn't have homework and the study group was canceled. I changed into the jean shorts I keep in my locker for emergencies and left my flannel shirt on. Shoes in hand I walked down the street in the rain. I forgot how good it felt to be carefree. Sometimes I wish grief hadn't overtaken me and I could still be the fun and goofy girl I used to be.

Halfway home I decided I didn't want to go home yet so I simply sat down on the side of the road. I closed my eyes, looked up, and let the rain hit my face. The feeling reminded me of a time when everything was easy. It was peaceful and let me just forget every problem I have. It allowed me to pretend I was still a child. But it was all ruined when I felt something that was definitely not a raindrop. 

I opened my eyes as the bright yellow yolk dripped down my face and saw a car speeding past on the other side of the street and I saw four boys. I only recognized two of the boys, Aiden Paul and Spencer Matthews. Spencer looked like he felt sorry for me and Aiden wasn't even paying enough attention to notice.

The boy who hit me I recognized from school, he was popular and he had a smile on his face as a cartoon villain would. I wiped the egg from my eyes and was thankful that the rain hid the tears that were running down my face.