They're becoming really bad, and I don't want them to screw up.

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March 16, 2000

Today was an extremely weird day. Hunter broke up with Stacy, because yesterday Catherine gave him a blow job while they were both on valium, and now they're going out. Catherine and Emma are like, obsessed with doing valium now, which is unnerving to me. They're becoming really bad, and I don't want them to screw up. [Sorry, who does valium for a good time? It must have been the only drug available for them to pilfer from their parents.] 

Also, the Kaylee and Matt thing. It wasn't such a big deal compared to what happened to Stacy, so I got over it quickly. I'm not mad at Kaylee because she's really shallow and too innocent, mind-wise, to be upset at. [Ouch.] Matt and I acted the same way as we always do in Spanish, which I liked. I don't want to be enemies with him, but I couldn't never trust him at all.

Stacy and I are friends again, which is the one good thing that came from this whole mess. I feel so awful for her! Today she was crying in the bathroom, and I had to go to the guidance counselor's office with her. I'm disgusted with Catherine for giving Hunter a blow job - I don't even think I can stand to look at her! But starting a fight with her won't help anything, so I'm not going to.

The other messed up thing that happened today is that everyone found out some interesting news about Emma and Catherine, which is that they ate each other out. I am not sure when - some people said it was yesterday, while they were both on valium, some people said it was two days ago at Steph's house, and some people said it was some time over the summer. I think that's the nastiest thing I ever heard in my life, and now I'm realizing how I don't really know Emma or Catherine well at all. [You'd think I would have had some compassion for the subjects of such a vague rumor.]

Oh, well. This weird day is over. I had this conversation with Jacob online a few hours ago:

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: what do you think about today?

Jacob: no opinion

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: it was the weirdest day ever i think

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: i think you were right about matt, which makes me mad. because you're always right and then you don't even gloat, you're just like "yeah, whatever, i'm right AGAIN" only you don't say that, you're just LIKE that. it would be better if you said it.

Jacob: thats like self egonistic.

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: what is self egonistic?

Jacob: as in self centered. big ego. egonistic. [Oh, egotistic.]

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: oh you mean "egoTIStic." you spelled it wrong.

Jacob: no. egonistic. [Eh... it's egotistic.]

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: it doesn't matter. [But it's egotistic.]

Jacob: anyway it's the best way to learn from your mistakes. the truth isn't always best.

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: but you were best friends with him and zach for years.

Jacob: i know him inside and out

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: but he told me he doesn't open up to his friends. he said he hardly knows hunter at all.

Jacob: wuts he mean by that? his true self doesn't show? that's pretty corny...

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: i know it is. but the reason i'm mad is cause i feel supid for trusting him cause it was like... i thought he was this tortured soul who had no one to talk to and i was like, i'll be the one he can talk to. but it turns out he was just a dick, and you knew that but you didn't tell me.

Jacob: i did tell you... kinda. i didn't want to go out and bluntly tell you don't go out with him.

IMAQTpieNUlikeit: why not?

Jacob: me and him are in enough shit. dont want to associate with him or talk about him. if you like him you like him

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