My Voice for My Heart

Chapter 36: Disappear

(A/N- I originally planned for this to be published on Update Day, but I am nowhere near 10,000 words, so I am just posting the chapters I have completed. Thanks for your patience!)

Phillip's Point of View

The students returned to my cottage and nodded at me before beginning their work. When they'd first arrived for their lessons, I'd had something else for them to do.

Make her disappear.

They knew what I meant. From the moment Keela had first arrived, the other students had noticed her. Even hidden away, she made an impression on them. She'd helped in the kitchen and with the animals. She didn't know it, but the chores she took on were those of the students, and they appreciated what she did them for them.

This was a place of learning, but also of responsibility. While we had servants, every person was expected to help the house run efficiently. The students learned the importance each person's role; they learned how what they did impacted everyone else. Obviously, there were chores that were less desirable than others: cleaning, mucking stalls, peeling potatoes. Keela had done those things without being asked, or looking for credit. Her presence was instrumental in identifying the future leaders and eliminating the entitled gentry. I saw right away those people that were right to rule and guide, and those that were not. A few insults may seem harmless enough, but when directed at a person with no power or family, it showed all of us who were listening, watching, and judging the people who would stay true to our ideals, and those with ulterior motives.

Thinking of ulterior motives reminded me of McKendricks. I brought Keela to stay with me when McKendricks, and his oily friend Mac Aodh, arrived. McKendricks was a mistake our society had to remedy. He'd been allowed to pledge and join our circle. He'd appeared to take our mission seriously, to hold it as close to his heart as we did. Our society was built on an ideal, and we all believed in it. We lived in a dangerous world, and we would do our best to guide leaders to protect those less powerful than themselves. We would help them rule with mercy and compassion.

McKendricks just wanted to rule. Rumor after rumor reached us; stories of his ambivalence, his inaction, and as time went on, his greed. He'd used our group to bend the ears of powerful leaders. He didn't guide them, he encouraged them toward violence. He'd been a confidante of Aohdan's father; a man with more land, more money, and less heart than even Lord Arden. He was cruel without McKendricks' help, but with it, the depths to which he'd plunged shocked us.

First there was news of his anger at Arden. That was expected. Somehow, the son he'd placed in Lord Arden's care had disappeared. Now I knew what had happened, but at the time, I'd been as confused as everyone else. How do nine young men, all from prominent families, all members of our circle, disappear without a trace? Aohdan's father, Gregor, had been counting on his son's musical talent getting him into palaces across the world. He'd fostered him to Lord Arden early in Aohdan's life. Choosing him about other families since Arden was the wealthiest and most powerful man in the land (besides himself and the king.)

With McKendricks at his side, he rode with a dozen soldiers to Arden's keep. McKendricks and Gregor thought they would have the advantage. But when they arrived, they were disappointed. It was clear to everyone that Arden was doing everything in his power to locate the Aohdan, and that he hadn't been the cause of his disappearance.

Angry at being thwarted, Gregor and McKendricks rode way, but decided to stop at their tenants' houses and farms along the way. The purpose for that became clear all too quickly. They'd collected tithes for Arden, taxes for themselves, and left the tenants with nothing. If they couldn't pay with gold or silver, then they paid with horses and cattle, their harvest, their homes, and if none of that suited the men, their lives.

By that time, we'd recalled McKendricks, but we were still too slow. We'd given him too much leeway, trusted in his training too much. He didn't care about our mission, and he ignored us. He ignored us until we had no choice but to send the council after him and bring him back here, where we would decide what to do with him.

As soon as he arrived, something about Keela attracted him and the sycophant he brought with him. She was silent, and strange. Their interest caught all of our attention, and as a group, we decided to keep her out of his way. As much as I wished to just kill him (and I did, despite being a healer, as the man's actions called for nothing less than death) my hands were tied by our system of justice. McKendricks had a chance to defend himself, to make amends for his actions.

And so I was left protecting Keela the best way I knew how. I kept her close to me. When Aghaidh arrived, he'd immediately agreed to help. I assumed that he'd met her at Lord Arden's. His and Balthair's land abutted Arden's. But Keela didn't know who he was. Still, she grew to trust him quickly. I could see Aghaidh's growing attachment to her, but I'd ignored it. Stupid. I should have learned from ignoring McKendricks; issues and emotions are only compounded if they aren't addressed. I should have killed McKendricks, and I should have told Aghaidh about his brother, and about Keela's feelings for him. I should have made it clear that I knew her heart belonged to Balthair. I believe it was taken by all nine of the young men who'd grown up at her father's house, but that may have been too much for Aghaidh.

If I'd done as I should, McKendricks never would have contacted Lady Maeve.

I sighed, rubbing my hand across my forehead.

We had so much to do, and so much more about this world to understand. While we had been concerned with vassals, lords, and kings, we'd forgotten about the ancient powers that existed alongside them. I never thought about the power a witch could wield. Faced with the swans, who I knew to be bewitched, I accepted the magic that transformed them.

I saw Keela toil away, and like a child, I believed the story would unfold as it should. Keela would sacrifice, counter the magic, and the swans would be restored to their human forms. I didn't imagine that the witch who had cursed them would show up at our door, or that we would be so poorly prepared when she did.

So we used all the skills we had. We organized, planned, spied, and hid. The first two students were not the first I'd sent to hide Keela's trail. I'd sent others, each group unaware of the other group, so if Maeve was to dip into their minds, she would only see a piece of the puzzle. I had other groups tramp about the woods. They had no idea why I had them go where they went. They probably assumed my age was making me senile.

"Go out to the lake," I told them. "Row across it to the forest. Walk in counterclockwise circles of increasing circumference."

Other groups were told to knock down trees, dig trenches, find plants. I wanted the land disturbed. If someone tracked her, they wouldn't be able to tell what was done by her, and what was ordered by me.

Which brought me here; I had to leave. I couldn't risk McKendricks or Maeve making me lead them to her. I couldn't let Maeve know I knew that she'd transformed the men into swans, or how close Keela was to finishing her task. As annoyed with Aghaidh as I'd been when he'd taken off in a snit, it was actually working to my advantage. If I found him along the way, I would tell him to stay away. The fewer people with connections to Keela left, the better.

I stood up, stool scraping against the stone floor and clapped my hands together.
"Friends," I announced, "please take your work back to your rooms. I will see you back here in the morning. Please finish your maps of the human body, and return with them tomorrow."

I would be gone tomorrow, leaving no trace. I could visit colleagues in some of the warmer climates, it would be good for my bones. The cold was settling into my joints, making me stiff and cranky. I just hoped when I returned, Keela would still be alive.