Tanya's POV
We celebrated our new house by having a barbecue in the backyard. Malawak ang backyard at may isang puno ng mangga sa isang sulok nito. I instantly fell in love with the place because of that. Ito talaga ang bahay na matagal ko nang pinangarap. This had always been what we wanted.
I took in a deep breath. Naramdaman kong nanikip ang dibdib ko ng maisip ko iyon. The hollowness in my chest ached. Ganitong bahay ang napipicture ko sa isip ko noon. Kasabay kong pinangarap ang buhay na kasama siya dito. We made this dream together but he wasn't here with me.
Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko. Si Wayne pa rin ang nakikita ko sa isip ko. I could picture the life we could've had together. Simple at tahimik lang. Nakaupo siya sa tabi ko dito sa patio habang pinanonood namin ang mga anak namin na nagtatakbuhan, mga batang kamukhang-kamukha niya. That had always been my dream, he had always been a part of it.
"Mommy!" Hinatak ako pabalik sa realidad nang marinig ko ang boses ni Therese. Naglalaro sila ni George sa hindi kalayuan. She waved at me and I smiled, waving back at her. My life now was different from what I'd always dreamt. Therese and George were my reality. Hindi na parte ng realidad ko si Wayne, hanggang sa pangarap ko na lang siya.
Magsisinungaling ako kung sasabihin kong wala akong pinagsisisihan sa mga desisyon na ginawa ko. That wasn't the truth. I'd forever regret leaving Wayne. I'd forever wonder what could've been with him. Pero siguro ito talaga ang kapalaran ko. That had to happen because of Therese. She was the most beautiful gift God had given me. Kahit marami akong pagsisisi wala akong babaguhin sa nakaraan ko if it meant nothing having her here with me now.
I'd always love Wayne but maybe we just weren't meant to be.
Tumunog ang doorbell. Ibinaba ko sa la mesita sa tabi ko ang hawak kong juice. I got up and went into the house to open the front door. Nagulat ako ng tumambad sa harap ko si Wayne.
"Hey." He greeted with a wry smile on his face.
Biglang nanuyo ang lalamunan ko at napalunok ako ng makita ko siya. A flash of what had happened between us a week ago came back to my mind. I could still remember the feeling of his warm body pressed against mine, I could still taste his lips, I could still hear his moans and groans in my ear. I still remember how sore he made me the morning after.
Shit. Napamura ako sa isip ko. Hindi ko alam kung paano kikilos sa harap niya o kung ano ang dapat kong sabihin. I wasn't prepared for this.
"A—ano'ng ginagawa mo dito?" Iyon ang lumabas sa bibig ko.
"George invited me over." He answered. Tinitigan niya ako sa mga mata ko. There was a mischevious glint of something in his eyes. I felt uncomfortable and looked away.
"Ganon ba?" Sabi ko. Hindi man lang nabanggit sa akin ni George ito.
"Aren't you going to let me in?" He chuckled.
Parang napahiya naman na tumabi ako. I opened the door wider and motioned for him to come in. He took a step in and closer to me. I could smell his cologne mixed with his natural scent. Agad akong napaurong palayo sa kanya. The tension between us was palpable and I felt nervous around him.
"Where's George... and Therese?" He asked, looking around the house.
"N—nasa backyard sila." Sabi ko at tumalikod ako. Alam kong nakasunod lang siya sa likod ko, ilang hakbang lang ang layo mula sa akin. I felt all tensed up, like there was a knot in my stomach. Right behind me was the man I'd made love with a week ago. Muntikan pa kaming mahuli ni Therese. Buti na lang hindi iyon nabanggit ng bata kay George. Sana lang nawala na sa isip niya iyon at hindi niya na mabanggit pa iyon.
