ZIPS

Blue Print

I wasn't born with a silver in my mouth. Growing up with just a grandmother and two other uncles in the house showed. My grandmother said my stories would take me somewhere. I never put much thought into what she meant. But I knew I wanted better.

Now at the age of 21, I'm a graduate from Spelman and a registered nurse. Writing was just my hobby. "What would I be without my journal? " I wrote.

I closed up my journal and walked into my kitchen. I lived alone in a two bedroom apart in the hills. Klien Hills to be exact. After I moved from out of the jam packed project apartment with my grandmother and two uncles I grabbed a place on the outside of where my family lived. It was best to stay close I guess.

I took the tea bags out the pot and sat it to the side to cool. Mixing and stirring the sugar in, I placed the pitcher of tea in the refrigerator before helping myself to a glass of ice tea.

I checked my time on the microwave and it read 3:32. I spent my off days writing mostly. It was just me and my kitten nipsey. Being away from my family my life seemed pretty normal and so far it was.

After losing my little brother by a drive by over drugs my life changed drastically. It forced me to calm down. Believe it or not I was into the streets badly. I was smoking, robbing and selling anything I could get my hands on just to survive.

I had it rough coming up. My mother was around but she was sprung out on herion. I would see her every eclipse. My dad was a big time drug dealer. Better known as the dope man. Everyone knew my father Eric. He only dropped by every summer giving my grandmother $100.00 for school clothes. My grandma was all of 76 years old but she tried her best with us. I guess you can say her preaching did some justice. My brother Aaron and I moved in with her when I was just nine and he was seven. Our life's took a big turn after wards. Typical life of anyone coming out east Atlanta.

I remember my grand mother saying how she didn't want us exposed to 'the real world' or how cold it was. But living with her only turned us loose in it though.

I snapped from my thoughts as my buzzer buzzed. Walking to the peep hole I see that its my friend Rachel. I swung the door open giving her a welcoming hug.

"I have been calling you all day. You've had your head in that journal huh?" She went on rambling. "I swear you haven't been the same since--"

I stopped her before she could say another word. I just knew she was going to say how I changed since the death of Aaron. "Not today, okay Rachel? Look I was busy!" I lied.

"Doing what? Not a damn thing! Come on girl, come out with us tonight. Its ladies night and that big club Zips opening."

I plopped on the sofa. "I'm not sure. I was just going to stay in, get a red box movie and chill."

The club life wasn't for me anymore and Rachel couldn't understand that.

She sucked her teeth. "Girl. You're going to miss out on a lot of fun." She stood from the sofa walking into my bed room and I followed. "But since you're not going you wouldn't mind if I wear this dress, right?"

I rolled my eyes and nodded yes. "Okay now go. I was busy." I said as I play pushed her out the door.

Finally, I was alone again.

After four years I still wasn't the same Kylie. I knew I had to be better than my parents and make a difference for the sake of my little brother. I felt as if it was my fault. I should've been there for him. I should have taught him right from wrong since we had no one else to do so. If I would've been a role model instead of a terrible sister then he would be here right beside me.