Noise {Phan}

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Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

That was a sound I had gotten used to. A sound that made me feel safe. A sound that reassured me that Phil's heart was still beating. It was scary to say the least. To think of a world without Phil, because he was my world.

He helped me get through everyday without having to force a smile or want to go back to my room and be my anti-social self. Nope, Phil played video games with me, cracking jokes all the while. We'd scroll through Tumblr together, showing each other funny posts. Even the days we went out of the apartment were enjoyable.

It was funny how one person has changed my entire life, before I never needed anybody and I was fine with that. Then Phil Lester came along and fucked everything up. He showed me a world of excitement and wonder, a world full of emotion, and I don't know how to see that world without Phil guiding me.

There is also the fact I've fallen in love because of him. Him and his amazing personality. His beautiful pale skin, black hair, and excitement-filled blue eyed combination. It wasn't fair to my heart, it never stood a chance against Phil.

I closed my eyes for what seemed like first time since the accident, even thought it had been 2 weeks and sighed. My head and heart was pounding, it was nothing new to me that I was in love with Phil. Soon my brain decided to finally rest.

The highway was clear, no cars in sight as we drove away from the bowling alley we were just at.

"You totally could've of pulled ahead on that last round! Did ya get distracted by my good looks when you missed that strike?" Phil asked while looking over at me.

"You are pretty dazzling," I replied with a slight blush on my cheeks.

"I can't argue with that!" Phil said, while playfully grinning.

Oh no, I thought. He was planning something and it didn't seem like something good. Phil continued driving for a while before he leaned over and kissed my cheek. He then turned his eyes back on the road and continued driving, he was blushing like a mad man but I couldn't say I was doing any better.

Soon we were back home and Phil went straight to his room and I went to mine. It wasn't long that I had fallen asleep, just to wake up to Phil's screams.

I jumped out of my bed in record speed and grabbed a tripod that was sitting around my room. As I neared closer to Phil's room I heard 2 gunshots and some glass breaking. I made my way to his room and once I was there I saw an image that would haunt me for the rest of my life.

Phil's body laid sprawled out across the bed, blood slowly spreading across the blue comforter. The main sources were his stomach and shoulder, but while he was trying to back away he hit his head on the back board of his bed and it knocked him out.

I called 911 and from there he was rushed to the hospital.

I woke up from my dream and held in my sobs, trying to stop the waterfalls of silent tears. That was the 9th time in 2 weeks that I have had that dream. The other 5 were of Phil calling my name and pleading for me to help him just before he got shot by the unknown intruder. Every time I tried to help he would get shot, but in the head, killing him almost instantly.

Quietly I spoke to Phil while holding his hands, hoping to make some kind of noise other than the constant beeping. "Hey, Phil... I know your in a coma and probably can't hear me but I just want to say that I want you to wake up. I want you to wake up so bad. I need you Phil. I need your smiles and you laugh. I need your beautiful blue eyes to brighten the beginnings and ends of my days.

Did you know that I love you? Did you know I love your smile and laugh, and the reason I need it is because people never want to let go of something you love..."

Suddenly I could feel his hands squeeze mine, and it was then I screamed for nurses because there was still a chance that he would wake up.

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