Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
A/N: I am changing the song of the chapter to fit Harry and Mariana's situation.
Wednesday
Looking up at the ceiling of my old childhood bedroom, I start to realize all of the shitty things I have done. I let my mother down and I hurt everyone who ever cared about me. Mariana is just one prime example. For the past three days it has been torture. I told Mariana I will give her space, but I cannot do that. I miss her touch, her laugh, the way she bites her lip when she gets nervous. I just miss everything that she does. My thoughts transfer over, we have been on adventures, but we have never been on an official first date. Should I ask her out for a picnic? What would make that even better....? To serenade her with an original song that I wrote. I have some ideas since I write in my journal every night.
Some lines that kept coming up was that I would be the star in her life... Tired of feeling alone.... and how an important photo seems shattered. That is all my feelings. I made promises that I have messed up and I feel as if I shattered it beyond repair. All I know is that I am tired of being alone and I know that I messed up but I don't want her to leave and be gone...leaving me behind. I know and understand what it is like to be with someone like me. Trust me. I am myself and I even tire myself of the old routine. Going in the office I take out a notebook that I have never used. It was so juvenile. My notebook had TMNT characters on it. I grab my bike helmet and take a ride on my motorcycle to go somewhere other than my living room. Getting fresh air so that I could write the song with a clear mind.
"Hi Harry. How have you been?" My neighbor asks. I completely forgot her name. I never spoke with her unless I was too drunk or hung over. She was never really all that kind to me in the past. Understandably so though.
"I am fine thanks. Have a good one." I tell her as I ride off into a different location.
"Don't let me go... 'cause i'm tired of sleeping alone." I sing in my head and I make a mental note to write that down. I am thinking this line could be the chorus. Or some part of it. When I noticed a small park that was empty... I decided to stop my motorcycle and went to find a spot for me to get to writing. Right when I sit on the grass, I feel that I should change the pace of the song... or maybe even the concept. Maybe I should write about how happy she makes me and how happy I would be with her in my life.
When we were together and walking around...I noticed stares from people and I think that they were talking about us. Which is inevitable. I am filled with tattoos... and Mariana is a blank canvas that is so bright. I don't care what people say when we're together... This is good.. one line down. You know I want to be the one to hold you when you sleep. Two lines down... Cuddling and holding her in general just gives me the best feeling in the world. If there was a cloud 99, I would be on it... when I have her in my arms. All I know is, she is the only person I see myself with... forever. I just want it to be you and I forever... I know you'll want to leave, so come on baby stay with me so happily. I got the chorus down. Now I need to think about the song as a whole.
