Losing Patience

[16]

Boo you so blessed to have yo mama
Man I'm so fa'real
Through them lil pictures and my daughters the only time I see her
But I'm a man tho.
So I keep praying tho
    When times get hard I know she   Got me in her hands bro
       (Webbie x Pray for me mama)

Patience

I wasted no time making it to the hospital. I walked in and went straight down the long hall to Cash's room. I stared at him as all type of needles and tubes were in his body. Trying to keep him alive. He didn't deserve to live. "Dear God, Ima ask you to make my heart cold tonight. Forgive me for my sins." I prayed never taking my eyes off Cash.

I walked over to his bed side "why'd you have to kill her?" I whispered in his ear. "She was only a child." I seen tears fall from his eyes. "It's too late to cry now. A fucking year went pass, you should've cried then. Tonight .. You die. For what you did to my baby." I sucked up my tears and took a step back.

I pulled the plug and watched as his heart monitor flat lined. I stood there watching as he took his last breath before the nurses and doctors ran in. "What happened?" The doctor asked me. I shrugged my shoulders and ran out.

•

•

•

I thought killing Cash would make me feel better. I thought I would feel powerful, untouchable, and lastly, complete for getting rid of Heaven's killer... But I didn't. I still felt empty. I need help. Of all the years I've completely ignored the need. But it's true.

DING-DONG

I Heard my doorbell ring. I slowly got up and walked over.

"Who is it?" I grumbled. I really didn't feel like company tonight.

"It's Kev."

I haven't seen Kevin since that night at the strip club. My heart jumped out my chest. "Uh, gimme a minute." I ran to the back took my bonnet off, brushed my hair, and slipped on some clothes. I walked back over to the door and did a breath check before opening it.

"Damn, took long 'nuf." He said eyeing me up and down.

"Hush up" I said moving aside and letting him in.

He looked around "nice li place"

"Thanks"

There was an awkward silence for about ten minutes.

"So, you heard 'bout Cash huh?" He raised a brow at me

"Umm.. No, what happened?" I stumbled.

There was another awkward silence.
"Well, he died. Doctors was tryna find out what happen. But ultimately couldn't find anything. Besides the cord that was keeping him alive, was pulled."

"Wow" i said, trying to play off.

He stared at me "yeah, but the only deal is.. We tryna figure out who did it and why. Cash couldn't do it to himself."

I remained silent and took a sip of my water.

"So why'd you do it P?"