Things Only Musician Understand

Part 34: JJ

dad,

was a complete dick

the entire time

we were fishing.

I know,

"Why didn't you say no?"

"Are you fucking stupid?"

I heard it all when I got home.

No matter how much

I am fighting

the agreement for custody

I am required to spend time with him,

and fishing

was one of them.

The entire time I was with him

I couldn't help

but worry

and watch my words

for care

of slipping

and saying Justin

or Raylin

or Eliza.

I hardly spoke

because

that's all I could think of,

in a car with my dad.

Fishing was horrible

and good god

if the man talked any more

My ears would come off.

and every moment

I thought

of how much I hated him

and wished he would get out of my life.

On the ride home

he asked me,

sober,

but probably high,

"How's your slut of a girlfriend?"

and you know what I said

"Shut the hell up."

but.

it didn't end there

"You know you don't have to be pissed off

if your whore cheated

it happens to me all the time.

It's their job right?"

I think I lost it

right about thereish

"She's not a whore,

she's not a slut,

she didn't leave me,

and I'm nothing like you.

You don't kn0w anything about me

so shut the fuck up

and drive me the hell home

where I should be."

Instead he pulled over

and looked at me.

"Do you want to pretend

that your life was horrible?

You had a good life

and you know it."

I scoffed

"Good life,

every night

you would beat

mom

and I

until we could no longer stand.

You beat me

every time I saw you.

You threatened to rape my mom,

and then did.

You threatened to rape my girlfriend

and I'm not letting that happen.

So drop this,

'life was great'

pitch

and drive me the fuck home

so I don't have to be around you

any longer."

He turned to me

with hell in his eyes

"Don't you tell me

what I did and didn't do.

Don't tell me

what to do.

Don't accuse me

of things.

You are my son

and that means

I demand respect

and

I don't need to be snubbed

by my own son

who should learn his place."

He's so full of himself

"Respect?"

I said laughing

"you'll never get any of that.

Not from me,

not from mom

not from Eliza

not from anyone.

You see,

that's what happens

when you beat the shit out of your kid

and your wife,

you lose respect from the world.

and if you think I haven't leaned my place

then you are more fucked up

then you even know

because I have

and it's with Eliza

and our kids

so take me home

then leave me the fuck alone."

Oh,

shit.

No!

I didn't

Son of A bitch

and

the

world

goes

dark

as

pain

lights

up

on

the

side

of

my

face.